warning: content PG-16
Do you allow your 16 -18 yr old sons to look at porn? Do you have blocks on their phones?
Quite a discussion with my 16 yr. old DS last night. Earlier in the month I walked in on my son taking care of his male business while on live chat with his GF. I didn't see the screen so only can assume she was showing him her front or something. It was embarrassing for him yes. He didn't think he had done anything wrong except for bad timing. Last night we really got into a discussion, (him in tears). I told him it was completely unacceptable for him to be sexting OR videoing or live chatting in a sexual manner with his GF. He said live sexting couldn't be caught by the police or government so it was okay...hmmm. I let him know if he wanted to keep his phone he had to agree to my terms of the phone not being used for him and his GF in that manner. He still disagreed and continued in tears. He said I have so many blocks on his phone and I am the ONLY parent out their with these crazy controling rules. I have blocks set up on his phone through our cell carrier. I didn't really think they would work so well, but he says they do and they block to much. He said I didn't understand guys and they need to get "off" with pictures and images and ALL of his friends look at porn on their phones and since he can't he needs to look at pictures of his GF and thought that would be better than looking a pictures of strangers. He tried to negotiate he would no longer use the phone with his GF in those manners if I would unblock his phone so he could look at porn. I tried to explain to him, porn is not realistic, it's not loving, some of it is brutal and I don't want him seeing those images and think those things are ok. I also explained how people could get addicted to those sites. He just didn't get it or want to hear it. I had my husband come in on the conversation because my son kept saying being a female I didn't get it and Dad would "get it." He tried to calm my son down. We agreed his dad would get him a Playboy magazine if he felt the need, but video online porn could be dangerous. He didn't want the magazine he said they were old school and not how things are done theses days and we were at a stand still.
My question to you do you have block your older teens from porn, have the don't ask don't tell policy or allow it? Am I to over bearing? Son claiming I won't let him grow up and do normal guy things. He is a great kid and this is our only problem with him. Should we let it slide and look at porn. My son says he'll walk around miserable and grumpy all the time if we don't. My husband is afraid he will get into other things if I keep such control on him. I thought I was just being a good parent, but maybe it's time to loosen the reins....I just don't know. I'm tired of being the bad guy and hated. Feel like my son is just waiting to get out of the house and away from me.