How do you get trust back?

[KarenR]

My daughter has been caught in several lies recently. She is a senior in high school and I know kids will lie to their parents. But my questions is... how do you get past that? How can I trust her again? She is leaving in the fall for college and I would like to repair our relationship before she goes. I am afraid if I catch her in anymore lies I won't be able to get past it. Do I need to just accept teenagers lie or should I follow up on what she tells me?

[02nana07]

 I think trust has to be earned and it isn't just given.  I also agree it would be hard if you catch her in another lie there is nothing you can do to help it is up to her whether she lies or not. 

[MansfieldMama]

Unfortunately it takes time to earn that trust back.  I hope your daughter realizes that and works to earn your trust before leaving for college.

[atlmom2]

Let her know its gonna take a while. Until then tell her all bets are off. Trust is broken.

[fantasticfour]

It has to be earned back and she is the only one who can do that.

[LoveonHollySt]

My mother checked up on my stories several times while I was in hs and I feld betrayed and angry but I also felt what she was feeling when I did lie to her.  It was hard for both of us to get over.  Most teens do lie to their parents from time to time and trust has to be earned back.  But at some point you will need to forgive her as well.  When she leaves, you will have to trust her bc you can't be there when she f's up and put her on the right path again.  This is going to be hard for the both of you but it is something that we all have to go through.  Eventually you will have to trust in the fact that you taught her the best you could.

[JustaSM231]

What is she lying about?  Is it something silly or something that could potentially be dangerous for her?

 

[luckysevenwow]

This was my question also, for me it determines the outcome of a lie.

Quoting JustaSM231:

What is she lying about?  Is it something silly or something that could potentially be dangerous for her?

[MJP76]

Repairing trust takes time. And both parties have to work on it.

[lazyd]

Oh, my daughter and I are slowly working on our trust issues with each other.  It takes a LONG time.  My daughter is always askin me "why don't you believe me?"....well cuz....you have lied so much in the past. 

[boys2men2soon]

Follow up.   Not all teenagers lie.    She is going off to college, she is old enough to understand cause and effect.   She lies, therefore you can't trust her.      To move on and regain trust, you must get to the bottom of why she lies.