Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

need advice

Posted by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 2:32 AM
  • 5 Replies

 I have a 14 yr old son and he is introvrted when it comes to his peronal problems, such as school, friends needs, etc.  Do you know any tip (s) I can do for him to open up to me?  thanks !

by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 2:32 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-5):
gdiamante
by Bronze Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 3:37 AM

What I've found with my 13 year old is that when I push for that information, he clams up. So instead I just ask if anything interesting/funny/cool happened at school. And then he'll tell me a story about the basketball game he played with his friends at lunch or about the science experiment he did. I also ask him what point of history they're up to in social studies, and he'll usually tell me not only the topic but what he and his buddy in that class are doing for a report or project. 

For his other classes I usually have to look it up online; all the teachers post everything. He recently read "Flowers for Algernon" and we talked about the book. I'm still looking for the movie "Charly" to show him.

Keeping those kinds of communication going seems to help when he's having a problem.

fantasticfour
by Grumpy on Feb. 8, 2013 at 9:26 AM

Sorry  I have no idea.  Here's a bump though.

JustaSM231
by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 9:45 AM

Don't question him about specifics or push for any information.  Try to keep conversations with him light.  Tell him about your day, any silly or stupid thing that may have happened, a conflict that you faced during the day, to let him know that he may not be the only one experiencing problems or concerns.  Then take the time to listen when he talks.  Put everything aside that you may be doing and focus on him, let him know that he has your attention and interest.  Try to find some common ground you both can talk about, a book or a movie or something, that will open up communication between you with a neutral topic.   It may not work, especially if he is super introverted.  Also this is the age when teens start turning more to their peers than their parents as confidants.  It's a natural progression as kids tro to establish their own identities and social circles. 

luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 10:00 AM

Just talk, even if you feel like you are talking to yourself. He hears you and when you spark an interest he will talk also.

mumsy2three
by Shauna on Feb. 8, 2013 at 7:44 PM

Keep talking to him but not in a pushy or prying way.

My preteen son is kind of the same way. When he comes to me about something I stop what I am doing and listen. Sometimes he'll email me, when it's something he's not comfortable asking face to face yet. I did a journal with my dd when she was a preteen and it worked well with keeping the lines of communication open. I thought email would work better with my sons.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)