A little bit of background: Bri was almost 13 when she met Graig. He was her first 'real' bf. I know she was young but has always been years above her peers maturity wise. After only a month, she just ended it. He was devastated. She then asked a boy out at school (her and Graig went to different schools) who turned her down. Then at 13 she attempted to date a family friend who was almost 18. After going camping with my sister (his legal guardian), she came home and admitted that they had had sex. We obviously cut off physical contact between them (they were like cousins up until this point), but did still allow her to talk to him. I didn't really want to but felt she deserved at least that much since she came to us, and also didn't want to discourage her from coming to us with stuff she knew we wouldn't like in the future. Luckily she ended it after a couple months. She didn't date for awhile (her choice) and had a chance to sort of re-find herself. She realized she made a huge mistake in dumping Graig, and that her irrational behavior that followed for a couple months was her trying to erase the pain. They began to reconnect as friends.
March 13, 2012, they officially start dating again. Over the summer, we (along with his parents) could see that the relationship was deep and well beyond the typical teen romance. We could even see ourselves becoming in-laws in the future. They want to finish high school, then get engaged, and then get married. His mom would rather they marry right out of high school so they could then have sex as a married couple. Well over the past couple months, I could see they were really fighting off urges to have sex. A couple weeks ago, she confessed they were ready. Last weekend, she confessed that they had, and I told her I already knew based on our prior talks and the glow on her face. I know many would say have them wait until 18, but what makes that the magical age? I'd rather have mature teens practicing safe sex versus a legally grown adult sleeping around. So, I know he should tell his parents, but they're probably not going to take it well. We are prepared to take him in if need be, but really wish they weren't so focussed on him being married first. How would you handle it? Should I encourage him to tell them or just let them continue to be naive?
on Mar. 18, 2013 at 12:40 PM