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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

i feel lost please help.

Posted by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 8:40 PM
  • 16 Replies
i am a separated from husband stay at home mom.my husband walked out when i had to go into a wheelchair.that was 12years ago. he turns up every 4 or 5 years wanting money his family back and a place to stay
i joined los church nearly a year ago and my youngest daughter14 joined a little after followed by 17 yr daughter. my son 23 lives in another country but is coming home to introduce me to his pregnant Muslim wife whom we have never met. came as big shock as he had lovely girlfriend of 6 yrs waiting for him to return after business internship.
well that's a potted history. my problem is my youngest daughter has told her sister she does not believe in God and only joined church to shut me up. this makes no sense as everything that she has done and said would indicate she has a deep faith and understanding beyond her years.
Im heart broken to hear this and Im worried what happens about the people she has been baptized for ( including my mother ) if what she says is true and its all been a lie. what happens to them and there baptism and what happens to my daughter.? i have tried to talk yo her but get all upset and knotted inside and can't talk. advise please.
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by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 8:40 PM
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Replies (1-10):
jojo_star
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 9:35 PM

Your daughter goes on with her life, making her own choices, and living a life that makes her happy. If she doesn't believe, then she doesn't. 

tyfry7496
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 9:38 PM
2 moms liked this
This and tell your ex to get lost when he comes around.

Quoting jojo_star:

Your daughter goes on with her life, making her own choices, and living a life that makes her happy. If she doesn't believe, then she doesn't. 

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daisykat
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 10:13 PM
2 moms liked this
If you're really worried about her soul, I'll tell you a little about me. I was baptized at age 10 and grew up in an UBER-religious household and was angry at and terrified of God. There was no kind, loving, merciful Lord, it was all about punishment and hell. It was all about the rapture (any day now!) As a matter of fact, I was so afraid of having my back turned to God should the rapture occur at night, I used to force myself to fall asleep facing east. I would wake up numb and sore and praying for forgiveness for anything "inappropriate" I may have dreamt about during the night.

Fast forward to age 20- I was a practicing witch and belonged to a coven. It was there I found peace with God. It lasted about 13 years, and then I realized there were issues with my faith that I couldn't reconcile. After a year of serious soul-searching I went to a church, just to see how it felt. And now, at age 40, I am a happy, peaceful Christian. I have much respect and understanding for other religions and I found the God I was looking for.

My point is, she needs to find her own way. Don't worry about the baptism by water- she will now go through the "baptism by fire". Maybe she'll find her way back to Christianity, maybe not. You know, we're all searching for and wanting to believe in the same thing. It's the details we get hung up on. Only God knows what's in her heart. And be careful of what kind of God you're showing her. The judgemental, harsh one is no good. You need to talk more about his love and less about his wrath.
daisykat
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 10:19 PM
2 moms liked this
Oh, and you don't get baptized for other people, you do it for yourself. I'm not sure what you meant by "what happens about the people she has been baptized for". And yeah, tyfry7496 was right- tell the ex to take a long walk on a short pier.
boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Apr. 1, 2013 at 10:21 PM
1 mom liked this

I think you would be better off to talk to your clergyman in this situation.




bizzeemom2717
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 11:07 PM
You cannot control another Person's faith, also she was baptized for herself not others. I would speak with your pastor on the best way to discuss this with her without shutting her out. Ultimately it's up to her to make her own decision.
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bluediamondmom
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 11:32 PM
I agree with all these ladies. She has to find what her soul is looking for in her time and I too had a problem with the hell fire and brim stone the churches of my youth preached on every week. Show her the loving God. And turn the ex away. HUGS to you momma!

Quoting daisykat:

If you're really worried about her soul, I'll tell you a little about me. I was baptized at age 10 and grew up in an UBER-religious household and was angry at and terrified of God. There was no kind, loving, merciful Lord, it was all about punishment and hell. It was all about the rapture (any day now!) As a matter of fact, I was so afraid of having my back turned to God should the rapture occur at night, I used to force myself to fall asleep facing east. I would wake up numb and sore and praying for forgiveness for anything "inappropriate" I may have dreamt about during the night.



Fast forward to age 20- I was a practicing witch and belonged to a coven. It was there I found peace with God. It lasted about 13 years, and then I realized there were issues with my faith that I couldn't reconcile. After a year of serious soul-searching I went to a church, just to see how it felt. And now, at age 40, I am a happy, peaceful Christian. I have much respect and understanding for other religions and I found the God I was looking for.



My point is, she needs to find her own way. Don't worry about the baptism by water- she will now go through the "baptism by fire". Maybe she'll find her way back to Christianity, maybe not. You know, we're all searching for and wanting to believe in the same thing. It's the details we get hung up on. Only God knows what's in her heart. And be careful of what kind of God you're showing her. The judgemental, harsh one is no good. You need to talk more about his love and less about his wrath.
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gdiamante
by Bronze Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 11:46 PM

No one is baptized for others. Only for themselves. And nothing will happen to anyone else.

As to what happens to her... she's 14. MANY things can happen over the course of her life. I wouldn't worry about that.

suesues
by Silver Member on Apr. 2, 2013 at 8:34 AM
1 mom liked this

everyone is different talk to your pastor

fantasticfour
by Grumpy on Apr. 2, 2013 at 9:25 AM

 I have no idea why would you let your exhusband walk into your life every few years and turn it upside down.  Perhaps that's what your daughter has a problem with.  Why does God let this happen.  Then when your daughter is baptized for other people, that baptism is not for them, it is for her.  Only her.  It is something she does that's important to her.  My son is being raised in a catholic household yet he had doubts about becoming confirmed.  I told him that was fine, don't worry about it because this is his decision.  Spend his time figuring out his doubts and if he chooses then go ahead, otherwise I understand.

Your daughter has to find her own way and the more you force the issue the worse it gets.  Perhaps sit her down and ask her if she would prefer a different church, if she has friends she might want to go to church with and see what theirs is like.

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