My stepson is 13 yo and gets an I.E.P in school for being born with hydrocephalus. They have had him down for learning disabilities since pre-k. Fortunately for him, he doesnt look or act any different than other kids his age. He has managed to take advantage of his iep and simply does NOTHING in the terms of homework. He lies and says he doesn't have any or he finished it in school. He doesnt study at all and he barely completes any of his school work.
His grades all reflect an "f" during the whole grading period but they curve them to a "d"in on his report card. My husband can clearly see what is going on. He does absolutely nothing to fix it. His son gets no discipline for failing grades.
I got so tired of his laziness last year that we implemented the same punishment for him as my children had. D/F on report cards meant grounding. The minute he had limits set, all hell broke loose and mommy dearest played his game by taking us back to court.
I have tried explaining to my husband that he is doing his son no justice by allowing him to skate by with no consequences. He just makes excuses that the boys mother won't follow through, so what's the point?
We can't get him to lift a finger around the house. I am given the excuse that they dont have to do chores at their moms so they aren't use to it here. We have been a family for 4 yrs!
Really, what it all boils down to is this:
1. Our kids aren't raised with the same values.
2. I am a disciplinarian, my husband isn't
3. None of the other kids get by with the same things this boy does.
4. My husband is a pushover with his ex wife and is afraid of court so he parents on a guilt based level.
I have tried getting the boy into therapy but as a step mom, those plans we revoked by bio mom and she failed to take him back, as she didnt think it was needed. I am so sick and tired of trying. I am feeling used and i am feeling fed up. I am on the verge of taking my kids and leaving.
What else can i possibly do?