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Friends foul mouthed teen

Posted by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 4:17 AM
  • 13 Replies
Over the summer my boys and I went w a friend and her kids to FL, I had rented a house for a week, the daughter went straight to the master bedroom wo checking if its ok, suddenly the sister and her daughter were in the area and could they come by for a night then it was two nights then the sister left and the daughter stayed, the entire time the friends daughter was such a rude indiv, always called her mom a b**** and other names, farting, arguing, actually punched the cousin, and wanting to shopall the time, she ruined the trip, but I also think the friend was selfish for not stopping the behavior, the daughter slammed the door a million times, and this behavior imposed on us, she wasn't like this before, we are no longer friends, neither of us have reached out to the other but it bothers since we were friends for such a long time but she's allowing her daughter to grow up, she's 18, into a barbarian and I'm wondering should I have shrugged it off?
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 4:17 AM
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Replies (1-10):
lakerfan420
by Jamie on Apr. 9, 2013 at 4:38 AM
That's one of the longest sentences I have ever read! That aside, this is something that should have been brought up during the trip. By allowing it to go on, you sort of said you were ok with it. Granted it was incredibly rude and it sounds like the mother isn't really a good friend, but by not bringing it up (which for the record you shouldn't have had to as the other mom should have been parenting her kid all along) you basically said you were fine with the arrangement. It's no wonder the daughter acts like that, because mom doesn't do anything about it.
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newlife2013
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 5:25 AM
Quoting lakerfan420:

That's one of the longest sentences I have ever read! That aside, this is something that should have been brought up during the trip. By allowing it to go on, you sort of said you were ok with it. Granted it was incredibly rude and it sounds like the mother isn't really a good friend, but by not bringing it up (which for the record you shouldn't have had to as the other mom should have been parenting her kid all along) you basically said you were fine with the arrangement. It's no wonder the daughter acts like that, because mom doesn't do anything about it.

Really? Anyway, I did bring it up and then there was another thing, I did mention we were in a rental home on vacation so there is no where to go, I was more surprised at someone's teen behaving this way and how a friend didn't behave the way you would think.
lakerfan420
by Jamie on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:50 AM
So there were no hotels in the state of FL that she could have gone to? I get that you paid for the house so if your friend couldn't agree with your rules, you should have kicked her out. I'm sorry she ruined what should have been a nice vacation for your family. And for the record, I was talking about the other mom should have been parenting her daughter, not you. Sorry if that was unclear and yes, your old friend was in the wrong.


Quoting newlife2013:

Quoting lakerfan420:

That's one of the longest sentences I have ever read! That aside, this is something that should have been brought up during the trip. By allowing it to go on, you sort of said you were ok with it. Granted it was incredibly rude and it sounds like the mother isn't really a good friend, but by not bringing it up (which for the record you shouldn't have had to as the other mom should have been parenting her kid all along) you basically said you were fine with the arrangement. It's no wonder the daughter acts like that, because mom doesn't do anything about it.

Really? Anyway, I did bring it up and then there was another thing, I did mention we were in a rental home on vacation so there is no where to go, I was more surprised at someone's teen behaving this way and how a friend didn't behave the way you would think.

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atlmom2
by Susie on Apr. 9, 2013 at 8:44 AM
I would have disciplined her. Sometimes when outsiders say things it means more.
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luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 10:23 AM

Honestly when someone elses behaviour starts to infringe on my sanity. I have no problem telling them to knock their crap off. 


Barabell
by Barbara on Apr. 9, 2013 at 10:28 AM

If the mom wasn't going to say something to her daughter, in that kind of environment I probably would have spoken directly to the teen. The teen is 18 and legally an adult now, so I'm not sure why you couldn't have spoken directly to her.

newlife2013
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 10:46 AM
Quoting Barabell:

If the mom wasn't going to say something to her daughter, in that kind of environment I probably would have spoken directly to the teen. The teen is 18 and legally an adult now, so I'm not sure why you couldn't have spoken directly to her.


we did speak her, and that is the whole point, while we were friends for years, it was surprising to see how the daughter really behaved, I guess she was on her best behavior? It was surprising that my friend put up with it, we repeatedly kept telling her to stop and she didn't to the point where it offended the 'friend' and we no longer speak. I have just never heard a child speak to their parent this way.
Barabell
by Barbara on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:11 AM


Quoting newlife2013:

Quoting Barabell:

If the mom wasn't going to say something to her daughter, in that kind of environment I probably would have spoken directly to the teen. The teen is 18 and legally an adult now, so I'm not sure why you couldn't have spoken directly to her.


we did speak her, and that is the whole point, while we were friends for years, it was surprising to see how the daughter really behaved, I guess she was on her best behavior? It was surprising that my friend put up with it, we repeatedly kept telling her to stop and she didn't to the point where it offended the 'friend' and we no longer speak. I have just never heard a child speak to their parent this way.

I'm having trouble following your OP.

Why did you stop becoming friends? Did you lose respect for your friend? Or is she embarrassed by her daughters behavior? Or is it a combination of both?

racheal241977
by Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:27 AM

Sounds like my 12 year old niece, she cusses like a sailor. My other sis in law told me about her telling her mom to f off & to shut the f up. I was shocked cause had it been my child they would be picking themselves up off the floor. Her mom does allow her to cuss.

My niece has cussed infront of me, the s word or the b word, but I put her in her place right there & told her she is not to talk like that around me or in my home.

Also let her know I will smack those words right out of her mouth. 

If the parent allows it, really not much you can do except let them know its not allowed around you or your child

drfink
by Emily on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:32 AM

Why did you agree to the cousin staying ? We have a beach house and if a kid misbehaves several times and the parents do nothing I speak up loud and clear.We have had a couple of people find excuses to stay longer but as long as everyone is helpful and behaved I let it go .I did have a friend that invited a  kind of mutal friend to her beach house.The daughter was just flat out rude to everyone ,finally my friend said something. Our mutal friend got into a huff and packed up and left about 5 in the morning.My friend told me she could hear the mutal friend packing her car ,getting her daughter and leaving but she just stayed in bed and let her go.

The mutal friend has dropped huge hints to me about coming to my house...LOL aint gonna happen .I was there during the day ,saw her get mad because her rude 17 y.o. daughter was being corrected...not going to do that 

They are no longer close.It is sad but ok.Sometimes as time goes by some friends out grow or change so much friendships slow down.

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