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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

is it weird for a kid to act like this before leaving for college

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My daughter is really excited about the college she is going to, and is kind of giving up on the year already. Not with grades though, she still has As and Bs but she is fed up with almost everything else. Recently, she and her dad got in a little argument about something petty but instead of quickly resolving it like they usually do she ranted at him about how she was sick of being controlled and that he better start being more respectful. she said she had always been to scared to stand up to him but now she was almost out she wasn't going to just try and deal with stuff without standing up for herself. shes always been a pretty agreeable kid but thats all changed recently now she's almost out of this town and she claims shes just saying the stuff she always wanted to. she's basically ditched the girls i thought were her friends, all she said was she's sick of acting like she likes them. and this guy who i know likes her, i heard from my friend she rejected him pretty rudely. Im so shocked by this, ove never known her to be deliberately rude and i dont know whether to believe she really did hhave such big issues with everyone (though she always hated the small town we live in) or if theres a bigger problem going on. she says that shes sick of acting around people, and she just wants to get to college where she can have a new start. Do you believe this or is it something more i should be worried about?
by on Apr. 23, 2013 at 3:35 PM
Replies (211-219):
irishgal63
by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 7:57 PM

  sounds  like  there' s  something  she's  not  telling  you(maybe  being  bullied, or  something) .  I  hope  you  both  have  that  'heart-to-heart ' talk, SOON  ! 

etmermaid
by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:28 PM

Does she have a new boyfriend and new college friends?  Plus a surge of confidence  coming from a preperation to be independant is normal.  She's practicing on those closest to her, also she is likely a bit scared.  Her self image is changing from that of a highschool kid to that of a college student.  it may take he a little while to settle down and find a happy medium.

Sweet_Carol_126
by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:47 PM

I can understand her desire for independence, but unless she has her own money to pay for college, maybe she needs to be told that she is still dependent on parents.  As to her friends, I am very surprised by that though maybe the boy liked her more than she liked him.  It could be a problem when she goes to college if she is throwing off her behavior at home.  Could he be putting pressure on her not to go?  Or to have sex?  Maybe you need to try to sit her down and talk to her about what is going on.  Keep what she says confidential but se what is happening that she doesn't like her friends anymore.  Good luck to you.

CarolynC71
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 1:25 AM

It sounds a little extreme but somewhat normal. I would just sit her down and talk to her one adult to another. She still has to live with you through the summer so she has several more months before she will get her freedom. Just remind her that you are still her parents and deserve respect. You understand how she is eager to get out on her own but remind her that being an adult comes with responsibilities and those can be very tough on an 18 year old "child." You are only trying to prepare her to be an adult.

DawnMarieFTF
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 10:13 AM

Good morning, as an expert in this topic. I want you to know your daughter is normal. Your daughter has been given all these extraordinary tools to take into the world yet has had little practice using the tools. The one piece of parenting we did NOT get was that we as parents are the sterile Laboratory. First of all you need to know your child brain is not fully developed. As much as we would like to think it is, it is not. It will not be untik she is 30 years of age. She will then wake up and have an ahhhh ha moment like it all came together. At that moment her brain will be fully developed. Until this time arrives, expect yourself and your spouse to be the sterile Laboratory. I promise you, she doesn't mean anything she says. Consider you have gotten to this point and have not taken eachother out. You WILL  get through this thing called parenting. Your doing fabulous, I know to you it may seem hard, but I promise it will be worth it. Hang tight, don't take off the seat belt yet, you still have a good 12 years to go. Remember SHE CHOSE YOU GUYS as her parents. It was not the other way around. She did it wisely knowing you would give her all the right tools she needed to perfect this life. However along the way you got to Find your Dawn. Your a different person then you were 18 years ago, because of this amazing human being you call daughter. Thank her, she sculpted you into what God needed you to be.

Have FUN  & enjoy this RIDE called Parenting!

Dawn Marie,Author Motivational Speaker

mariarojas1969
by on May. 4, 2013 at 9:57 AM

shes probably having an identity crisis right now or in a " transitional stage",   a girl who will be  getting ready  to stand with her two bare feet  and soar....and mom, this is the time that you need her most....good luck.  I have also a daughter who is manefesting similarly to yours....keep posted ..tnx

PurpleHazey
by on May. 4, 2013 at 10:03 AM

All kids think they are grown and they know it all.

metalmomma86
by on May. 6, 2013 at 2:46 PM
1 mom liked this
Are you paying for college? Because any kid that acts like that would not be going away on my dime that's for damn sure. You need to tell her that she needs to amp up the respect or you will amp down the support.
Tell her you have been thinking it might be better for her to attend community college the first year. She will love that.
Marissaq11
by on May. 9, 2013 at 12:02 AM
It sounds like she's got some problems she's been bottling up but even so thats no reason to disrespect you and her dad. i would get the family together and talk to her about why she is acting how she has been
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