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never been more lost when it comes to raising a son untill.......

Posted by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 11:19 PM
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 He turned into a teenage son. I don't know if somethings wrong or if it is just male teen behavior. I knew him so well when he was my baby boy/child and always felt very close to him.Lord knows I love him. Always have. Then the teen years hit and I sometimes wonder did I miss something? Has he always been like this and I just didn't see it? What happened to my little boy. He's lost in there somewhere I think. I don't even know what goes on in that head of his these days. He keeps to himself so much. As a mother who is always there for thier every need, this is really  hard because I'm not sure what it is he needs and therefore unsure if I'm doing ok parenting him or messing it up completly. I feel lost on him sometimes. Shut out even. I hope he is ok. I hope that he will be ok and heading down the right path in life when this teen phase passes. I hope this is just a teen phase. Anyone else feel like raising a teen boy has left you wondering is this normal and where did that sweet boy I once knew go?

by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 11:19 PM
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by on Apr. 28, 2013 at 1:14 AM
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What is troubling you about his behavior? Is it only that he's gotten quiet? I have two sons, one is a teenager, the other is about to be a teen. They DO go through those spells where they withdraw somewhat; they suddenly want their privacy and alone time. Pull him aside and say, I just want to talk, don't say a word, just listen. Then tell him how much you love him and that you worry about him being quiet, and that if ever anything is wrong, you will be his greatest ally and will always have his back. Tell him that no matter where you are or what you're doing, if he wants to talk, you will make it a priority. And most importantly, no matter how you've reacted in the past to any misbehaving, from now on if he wants or needs to tell you about something he's done wrong, you won't yell or judge, you will help him remedy the situation in the most productive, positive way.

Take him out to lunch some afternoon, or take him fishing (trust me, it works and it's fun) or something he shows interest in doing. You will use that time together to talk. It make take him time to warm up at first, but if you make it a regular thing, he will open up. Just get him out of the house so he can't slink off to his room and shut the door. Good luck, mama. And trust me, what's going on, if it's just the silent treatment, it's pretty normal. *HUGS*
by on Apr. 28, 2013 at 1:15 AM
by on Apr. 28, 2013 at 1:17 AM

The do start to keep back more of themsevles to themselves during these years.  It is hard for a mom to go through, but I also think it's normal.  

by Silver Member on Apr. 28, 2013 at 7:40 AM


by on Apr. 28, 2013 at 10:33 AM

Hang in there mama! Yes, my son (13yo) has done the same thing to me! At first I was worried, mainly because he doesn't have many friends outside of school to hang out with and I thought his social skills sucked. He wouldn't open up to me like he used to, said everything was "fine". He only wanted to play his video game. I eventually had to almost make him go hang out with some of his local friends at the school park. At first he seemed bummed out, but now he has a great time and hangs out a few days a week after he does his homework and I've even met some new moms :) He went to his first dance *gasp* last week and is looking forward to the May dance next month...oh, and he danced with a girl- I got inside info on that one. Yup, our boys are growing up!

by on Apr. 28, 2013 at 1:16 PM
I have a DS age 20 who is away at college. It's normal for them to break away a little bit as they get older and more want that. However you also want to make sure you still have open communication, never ever more important than in teen years
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by Member on Apr. 28, 2013 at 1:31 PM
The saying is true boys come back to you in their 20's. I felt the same as you I knew my son well. Then he became a teenager who was a rude stranger who didnt like anyone in our family. He was an alien. I never understood him. Still don't most of the time, but I see more of the little boy he was coming back. He is 20.
by Silver Member on Apr. 28, 2013 at 3:59 PM

What precisely is going on?

Yes, they do change as they get older and the hormones hit. But can you be more specific?

by on Apr. 28, 2013 at 4:39 PM
I am having the same glad to know I am not alone!
by on Apr. 28, 2013 at 4:52 PM
You are so not alone!!!
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