So recently my daughter has had to retire to her room to use her laptop as the only chair that does not cause her back agony is in her room. Because my kids are in bed she shuts the door, turns on her light and uses headphones if she needs to listen to anything. Sometimes she shuts her door so she can practice her guitar, practice her singing, etc. She's recently started asking why we cannot knock on her bedroom door before entering. We've told her that it's because A) she get's dressed/undressed in the bathroom so we're not worried about walking in on her changing B) she knows she's not allowed to deal with herself sexually until it's bedtime because the kids will and do go and see her whenever they want and they do not need to see that. We've never caught her doing that, and never had to have a consequence for it thankgoodness - and C) It's our house. We have the right to actually enter that bathroom even when she's showering if we want to. She pays us $100 every 2 weeks. That is nowhere near enough money for us to seriously consider calling it "her" room. My husband thinks that her insistance on us knocking proves that she's up to no good and we need to call her on it. I think she's trying to act like the "boss". So what's your rule? Do you allow your adult/teen children privacy?
Edit: what I'm trying to say is, I'm happy to knock on the door - but I know that if I start knocking, then DD will say that seeing as I'm knocking that she can say no to me entering a room in MY house. Now does that change some view points/offer a wider birth in advice?
Edit2: Today I had to go into DD's room to help her move around some furniture. The entire time I was in there she refused to leave the room even though DH was trying to get her to help with some stuff. Later on, I asked for her password for her laptop so I could google something and she refused to give it to me; signing on, logging out of all her accounts and standing *right* next to me the entire time I was on her computer. Then after dinner DS asked to use her computer to type something up for school, As she was turning it back on and waiting for it all to load, I heard him ask what a program was on her computer and she told him that he had no right to look at anything on her computer, that it was hers and that if she heard him dobbing on her one more time (he normally shouts out "DD has twitter open. DD is messaging someone" regarding her computer or phone she would delete all his Xbox demos. and she also sat right next to him the entire time he was typing, which was painful because DS is a slow typer. She offered to type it for him so that it was done quicker but he refused. Now she's gone to her room and I've just gone in to check on her and she got cranky that I had opened her door without knocking and she's switched into her PJ's rather early which is unusial for her.