Daughters best friend bullying her, gonna kick her butt
New here and not sure where to start, sorry it's long, but I NEED ADVICE. My daughter J is 14 and has these 2 best friends for about 8 years. The one is neutral, but the other one, H always ends up putting J down, treating her second best, just plane making her feel bad. J is always crying that H treats her worse and when she says something to H, H just yells back and tries to make it all J's fault. Neither of them are angels and both start fights, but it is always J that comes out on the bottom feeling badly and crying, and H just doesn't care. I have tried to tell her to get other friends, which she has, but she keeps going back to H. Now, things have drasticlly changed. J was crying to me on Thursday and I told her to give H her space at school and don't say anything, just do what you need to at school. Well if H ingores J, it is ok, but if J ignores H, all hell breaks loose. She ended up saying J is a beeyooch. Not sure if I can swear here. Not going into the itty bitty details, but H was with some of her so called new friends, and I don't know if she was trying to be all big and bad and show off, but she ended up saying if J said anything or come outside, (H was outside of my house talking to the third friend) she was going to kick her butt. NOW, they have been friends for 8 years, J has stuck up for her when everyone told her to dump her and she was stupid for being friends with her. As a mom, I just couldn't sit back, and let this girl threaten J. For 8 years, I welcomed her into my house, took her places, treated her like a daughter and she is going to kick J's butt???? I said I wanted to talk to H and see what was going on. I just wanted to talk, but I ended up blowing up on her. She tried to exaggerate, and make it all look like J's fault. I just couldn't take it, I told her to stop F'n lying, that she needed to remember who was friends with her in the beginning when no one would give her the time of day. I told her she has issues and she needed to re-evaluate herself, that i didn't understand how one day you are best friends and the next you want to kick her butt. Now i feel really bad, she was crying, but she is vindictive and i am afaid she is going to retaliate against J because of what I did. Are there any mothers out there that would have done the same thing? J is really small for her age and I really think that H could do some harm. I just don't understand how you could do this to someone who was your best friend. I did call H's cell phone and apologize, becuase i really didn't want to hurt her with what I said, and i know i went too far, I just wanted to know what was going on inside that mind of hers. Disclaimer, H is a spoiled brat that gets everything she wants, and if she doesn't, she cries and cries until she does. I don't think anyone has ever confronted her like I did and said the things to her that I did. PLEASE, someone give me advice. Should i feel bad? I love my daughter and just couldn't sit back and see her so called best friend get away with this crap. Sorry it's long.