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Daughter dating her roommate? What would you do?

Posted by on May. 26, 2013 at 9:56 PM
  • 28 Replies
My 18 year old daughter is going to college in the fall, and she's found a girl she wants to room with. They met on Facebook, and aplied to room with each other. But when I was borrowing her phone cause mine had died, a text popped up from the girl and it seems like they've started dating after they got to taking? I haven't told her I know yet, but would this bother you? I'm thinking I'll let it be, they're both adults, but I'm not sure.
by on May. 26, 2013 at 9:56 PM
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Replies (1-10):
DropZoneMom
by on May. 26, 2013 at 10:15 PM
3 moms liked this

I'm assuming you were already aware your daughter is gay, since that doesn't seem to be the issue.   Honestly, the thing most parents of college students fear when the kids start dating is pregnancy -- at least you don't have to worry about that.   If it was my daughter, I'd let her know I accidentally saw the message -- and tell her to just take it SLOW.   It's hard enough to live with a roommate you don't know.   Even harder to be in a relationship with her.

tyfry7496
by Silver Member on May. 26, 2013 at 10:23 PM
1 mom liked this
Leave it be. She's an adult and can make her own decisions. I would talk to her about respect, treating each other nicely and what she will do if/when they breakup.
PurpleHazey
by on May. 26, 2013 at 10:25 PM

She's 18 what are you going to do?

boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on May. 26, 2013 at 11:13 PM
2 moms liked this

I would talk to her about getting too involved with a room mate.....what happens when/if they break up? 




atlmom2
by Susie on May. 26, 2013 at 11:17 PM
I would say no? What happens if they break up and hate each other? Would someone want their freshman dd living with a boyfriend at school? Doubt it??
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bizzeemom2717
by Jen on May. 26, 2013 at 11:21 PM
I agree I would be honest with what I saw and advise her to take it slow

Quoting DropZoneMom:

I'm assuming you were already aware your daughter is gay, since that doesn't seem to be the issue.   Honestly, the thing most parents of college students fear when the kids start dating is pregnancy -- at least you don't have to worry about that.   If it was my daughter, I'd let her know I accidentally saw the message -- and tell her to just take it SLOW.   It's hard enough to live with a roommate you don't know.   Even harder to be in a relationship with her.

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GleekingOut
by Silver Member on May. 27, 2013 at 8:12 AM


Do you mean no it wouldn't bother you or no you wouldn't allow it? Cause - as much as I admire your parenting and your rules - they are 18 - there's not much ANYONE can do about it.

Quoting atlmom2:

I would say no? What happens if they break up and hate each other? Would someone want their freshman dd living with a boyfriend at school? Doubt it??



GleekingOut
by Silver Member on May. 27, 2013 at 8:14 AM
1 mom liked this

I'd leave it - honestly she's about to go off to college - you don't want her going with a fight/argument. I would just wait for her to tell me and if she did - then I would tell her to take it slow. But on the other hand - if the deal is that you "snoop" through her phone until she leaves for college - then I would bring it up casually the next time I saw her. I feel though that if you tell her that you read her texts without her knowledge it will send her straight into this girl's arms.

atlmom2
by Susie on May. 27, 2013 at 8:52 AM
1 mom liked this
No, not allow it. Dorms don't allow guys and girls to live together so why allow this?


Quoting GleekingOut:


Do you mean no it wouldn't bother you or no you wouldn't allow it? Cause - as much as I admire your parenting and your rules - they are 18 - there's not much ANYONE can do about it.


Quoting atlmom2:

I would say no? What happens if they break up and hate each other? Would someone want their freshman dd living with a boyfriend at school? Doubt it??





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02nana07
by Ida on May. 27, 2013 at 8:57 AM

 remind her things could get bad if things don't work out and they still have to live together.

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