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Appropriate or Asking for trouble?


 

Poll

Question: Do you think it is appropriate for a youth group to have kids from middle school through college doing late night and overnight activities together?

Options:

Yes, this is fine

No, this is asking for trouble

Other


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 42

View Results

My step kids go to a youth group that takes place on Friday evenings from 7pm to 11pm.   The "kids" that attend range in age from middle school to college (ages 11 to 20).   Some of the events are movies at the mall, overnight slumber parties, late night swimming and destination trips (skiing, amusement parks, ect.).   On these outings there is only one youth group pastor who is 24.   

Do you think this arragnement is appropriate?   Would you allow your 13yo to attend?

 

by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 12:21 AM
Replies (21-30):
luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 9:18 AM

We're small town, and only have a few youth groups, and that is how it is done. So for me the age range isn't an issue. Depending on how many kids there are to this one counselor- would be where I might have an issue.

Barabell
by Barbara on Jun. 18, 2013 at 9:48 AM

I would need to know more about supervision. If there is proper supervision in place, I might consider it.

boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Jun. 18, 2013 at 11:01 AM

Are the college kids involved group leaders?    I know our local Young Life organization has many older, college age kids who are leaders.... I know several of them.    The supervise and mentor the younger kids.    Personally, I would not allow my 13 yr old to go anywhere overnight unless i knew the chaperones very well.




mumsy2three
by Shauna on Jun. 18, 2013 at 11:25 AM

I think there is too big of an age gap for the group. Are the college kids participants or group leaders of some sort?

drfink
by Emily on Jun. 18, 2013 at 1:28 PM

I have always lived in a large city but grew up in a small church.Our youth group was like this except no college students.We always had plenty of chaperones.As far as I know while we ,my younger sis ,and I were active nothing took place.Really the h.s. kids had little to do ...hang out ...with jr. high.I do remember older guys sometimes being chatty but a chaperone always joined us just talking...lol...at the time I didn't get why the chaperone started hanging out with us.Mostly though they stayed with their ages.

I belong to a much larger church.Sixth grade is solo .then M.S. and then H.S. but we also are large enough to have boy M.S. events ,girl M.S. events etc as well mixed all together ,The same for H.S..


bizzeemom2717
by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 8:08 PM
1 mom liked this

 

Quoting GleekingOut:

So you would find it weird that my special needs DD is best friends with 2 17yo girls?

 

Quoting bizzeemom2717:

No way, too big of an age gap. Also sorry but if a college boy or girl feels awkward around their own age I still don't think it's appropriate for them to hang with younger kids. Asking for trouble.

 

 

 Nope because it's a "special" circumstance, under normal circumstances absolutely! Still though, I wouldn't want my 15 year old DD hanging out with girls and esp boys who are years older.

GleekingOut
by Silver Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 8:10 PM



Quoting bizzeemom2717:

 

Quoting GleekingOut:

So you would find it weird that my special needs DD is best friends with 2 17yo girls?


Quoting bizzeemom2717:

No way, too big of an age gap. Also sorry but if a college boy or girl feels awkward around their own age I still don't think it's appropriate for them to hang with younger kids. Asking for trouble.



 Nope because it's a "special" circumstance, under normal circumstances absolutely! Still though, I wouldn't want my 15 year old DD hanging out with girls and esp boys who are years older.


No. If DD was a boy and was still more geared towards girls 3 years younger - I would have to put a stop to it until he was at least 22 for them to be definetely 18.

FindersKeepers
by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 11:28 PM

 DH and I do not know the group other than the few friends the kids bring over... we do not attend this church.   Everything you say was my experience with this type of all ages activity.  

Quoting lakerfan420:

How well do you know the group? I got involved with a church group around age 14. The youth services were mixed between middle school up through the college aged kids who still attended. My sister was one of those kids until she started her own family at 20, I'm 4.5 younger than her. Two of our youth leaders (who were older high school at the time) dated for years and everybody except the youth pastors (who really did care and had the youth group's best intentions at heart) knew they were sleeping together. Looking back, I can see how inappropriate that was, especially since they were supposed to be the model couple proving that teenagers could be together but delay intimacy. All that did was prove to me that even religious kids still have hormones and that they may act out on them just like secular kids. I met my dh there when I was 16, he was 20 and dating the senior pastor's daughter, who was also my age. That's how laid back the staff was. They broke up and we started dating when I was 17. We broke our promise not to sleep with each other once (we were trying the born again virgin thing) and I had my now 15 year old dd just before I turned 18. That probably didn't put your mind at ease, but again, how well do you know this group? Aside from those examples, most of the kids were really good kids. Or at least anything else was unknown to anyone else.


 

FindersKeepers
by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 11:34 PM

 There are 20+ kids ranging from 12 - 20+ and one youth leader who is a 24 yo male.


Quoting Barabell:

I would need to know more about supervision. If there is proper supervision in place, I might consider it.


 

FindersKeepers
by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 11:36 PM

 No... there is one leader who is 24yo male.   The other 3 college students just kept attending after they graduated high school, but are not leaders. 


Quoting boys2men2soon:

Are the college kids involved group leaders?    I know our local Young Life organization has many older, college age kids who are leaders.... I know several of them.    The supervise and mentor the younger kids.    Personally, I would not allow my 13 yr old to go anywhere overnight unless i knew the chaperones very well.


 

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