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Lying

Posted by on Jun. 24, 2013 at 4:52 PM
  • 14 Replies

I need some advice! Honestly my daughter is normally a really good well behaved and I feel trust worthy person. I am not just saying this because I am her mom but I really feel this way and others see it to but that being said... she has played minecraft for about a year now and loves it. SO about a month ago she told me she met a friend on there and her name was Jenny. She went on to tell me that they have so much fun building stuff and really enjoyed playing with her online. So honestly I didnt think to much about that being I know so many kids that do play the game and just thought she met someone that playes it like she does. Well long story short she started texting "Jenny" and sending picts of herself and talking on the phone to her..... Well come to find out IT WAS ALL A LIE!!!!!!!!!!! Last night about 12 her phones goes off and my husband goes and gets the phone and I see a text saying that "Jose got his phone taken away and he wanted to let you know" I read the text so many times in disbelief that this was what I was seeing. To spare the details she is grounded and the phone is permanently taken away and no minecraft either. I also had a serious talk with her... BUT her 13th birthday is Wednesday and I dont even think she deserves anything that we had planned. Can anyone give me some advice on what they would do and about how you would handle the party?? 

by on Jun. 24, 2013 at 4:52 PM
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Replies (1-10):
atlmom2
by Susie on Jun. 24, 2013 at 5:46 PM
1 mom liked this
Shows 12 yo kids don't need phones especially texting.
The party is a real tough one. You are giving her punishments already. I would probably do a party just because 13 is a big deal. She needs to know trust is gone, out the window and she has to build it again and that is gonna take years.
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boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Jun. 24, 2013 at 5:53 PM
1 mom liked this

I would let the party happen.    13 is a big deal...she is going to be a teenager!   The party is a great way for her to interact (with your supervision) face to face with her peers.    I would rather her live in Real Life and have friends that I know, than having her socialize with strangers playing online games. 





luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on Jun. 24, 2013 at 7:23 PM
Minecraft doesn't have to be played on a multi-player level. Just pointing that out.

Keep the party. Yes, she screwed up, take the phone and computer for a while.

Birthdays should only be taken for the most extreme cases. This isn't one if thosecases.
butterfly112505
by on Jun. 24, 2013 at 7:31 PM

I agree with all of you. I am glad so far everyone feels the same way I do about the party.  Also luckysevenwow I have been trying to look up today on how to disable multiplayer and have not had much sucess. Do you happen to know how to do that? 

luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on Jun. 25, 2013 at 12:30 AM
I'll ask my 11 year old, he should know but if he doesn't I believe my DD's boyfriend will.

Quoting butterfly112505:

I agree with all of you. I am glad so far everyone feels the same way I do about the party.  Also luckysevenwow I have been trying to look up today on how to disable multiplayer and have not had much sucess. Do you happen to know how to do that? 

bizzeemom2717
by Jen on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:46 AM
I agree.

Quoting luckysevenwow:

Minecraft doesn't have to be played on a multi-player level. Just pointing that out.



Keep the party. Yes, she screwed up, take the phone and computer for a while.



Birthdays should only be taken for the most extreme cases. This isn't one if thosecases.
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Not_A_Native
by Bronze Member on Jun. 25, 2013 at 2:38 AM
1 mom liked this

This is actually pretty minor, and I think you're REALLY overreacting.  You have another 5 years of her growing up, which is what she's doing.  Yeah, she lied.  So she gets her phone/video game taken away for a week or two.  A long talk about internet safety.

Then - let her be a teenager.  WITH the party.

MrsBLB
by Missi on Jun. 25, 2013 at 9:49 AM

I agree with the others.

disnchntdwife
by on Jun. 25, 2013 at 10:00 AM

I'm only guessing here, but maybe the reason she lied is directly linked to how you responded to this....I'm certainly not blaming you, but I know from raising my daughter (she will soon be 23) the few times she was dishonest with me, were always over things she knew I wouldnt approve of..not that any of that makes lying ok. The ultimate goal should be better and more open communication. I showed my daughter several stories online about young girls who were decieved (sometimes abducted and worse) by strangers on the internet before she started getting online without supervision or had a cell phone of her own. I dont think this should effect her party, give her a punishment and move on. If you make too much out of this, you can count on being lied to again in the future. Best of luck Momma!

fammatthews4
by Trisha on Jun. 25, 2013 at 12:18 PM

out of curiousity, what would your reaction have been if your DD had been up front with you and told you her online friend was a boy instead of a girl?  Is this why she lied?  Not that it makes it right, but sometimes it helps to understand why kids do what they do.  

Honestly I would go ahead with the party

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