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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

Teenagers first love

Posted by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 4:38 PM
  • 25 Replies

I have a troubled 13 y.o daughter who is head over heels in love with a 15 y.o. boy. They have just become a couple, but I'm afraid that he end up breaking her heart. The boy does not have a good reputation, and I have heard he has been in trouble with the police before. I have caught them smoking and drinking together so I'm scared of what he can make her do besides that. I do know they have slept together, but I'm afraid he'll make her do something she doesn't what to.

How can I tell my daughter that he is "bad" for her, without making her just rebel?

by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 4:38 PM
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Replies (1-10):
sahlady
by Gold Member on Jun. 28, 2013 at 4:54 PM
2 moms liked this

 that is the first issue that needs to be addressed.

Quoting juliaterirea:

I have a troubled 13 y.o daughter

 

sabrtooth1
by on Jun. 28, 2013 at 5:43 PM

If she's "troubled" she is ALREADY "rebelling" , so I don't understand what your difficulty is.  Time to BE A PARENT.  Get rid of the boy.  Tell your daughter NO BOYFRIENDS.  Start supervising your child, COMPLETELY.  No going ANYWHERE alone.  Get her counseling--and get some for yourself,

atlmom2
by Susie on Jun. 28, 2013 at 6:06 PM
1 mom liked this
Your 13 yo was caught smoking and drinking. Rock her world. She needs to know that is not gonna happen. Is she in counseling? 13 year olds never need to be in situations without adult supervision. Especially one who drinks and smokes and likes a 15 yo.
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nurse1997
by Member on Jun. 28, 2013 at 8:07 PM
1 mom liked this

What are u kidding me she would be locked up !   

bizzeemom2717
by Jen on Jun. 28, 2013 at 11:10 PM

 Since you have caught her smoking and drinking I would def not allow any unsupervised time what so ever, never! Also, she's already rebelling and is very young to be doing so, I agree with pp, you need to seriously nip in bud now or in a few years it will out of control and out of your hands, she could very well be in jail or worse. If you need help setting boundaries, seek professional help asap...family counseling, teen alcohol and drug assessment center, call the local 1-800 crisis line for resources and low income ideas if you don't have funds, but do now. Good luck.

luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on Jun. 28, 2013 at 11:19 PM

Took the words right out of my mouth!

Quoting sabrtooth1:

If she's "troubled" she is ALREADY "rebelling" , so I don't understand what your difficulty is.  Time to BE A PARENT.  Get rid of the boy.  Tell your daughter NO BOYFRIENDS.  Start supervising your child, COMPLETELY.  No going ANYWHERE alone.  Get her counseling--and get some for yourself,


fantasticfour
by Grumpy on Jun. 28, 2013 at 11:29 PM
1 mom liked this
Wow at 13 and you are allowing her to date a 15 year old who is getting her to smoke, drink and have sex? And you're wondering where this is going to go next??
juliaterirea
by on Jun. 29, 2013 at 2:40 AM

My daughter is already in counseling. I do set boundaries for her and I do have rules. I work 2 jobs so I have a babysitter for her at all times. What usually happens is that when I drive her to school in the mornings, right after I leave she leave school and is with her boyfriend. I don't allow her to drink or smoke and I have grounded her for it. I do feel I'm being a parent, since I'm a single mother of 3 kids (14, 13 and 10 y.o.) I just feel its harder

destiny83
by on Jun. 29, 2013 at 2:52 AM
1 mom liked this

I feel for you momma. It's hard to be a single parent and watch your kids every move. Is there anyway you could tighten things up and have someone there to pick her up before schools even out? Or even a peers mom who you trust in parenting skilld to let her carpool with them so she's never alone? 

Where's dad? 


Quoting juliaterirea:

My daughter is already in counseling. I do set boundaries for her and I do have rules. I work 2 jobs so I have a babysitter for her at all times. What usually happens is that when I drive her to school in the mornings, right after I leave she leave school and is with her boyfriend. I don't allow her to drink or smoke and I have grounded her for it. I do feel I'm being a parent, since I'm a single mother of 3 kids (14, 13 and 10 y.o.) I just feel its harder



bizzeemom2717
by Jen on Jun. 29, 2013 at 2:54 AM
1 mom liked this
Awesome that you have her in counseling! Since your boundaries aren't working real well at this point I would ask the counselor for guidance. What does the counselor say about the situation? Hopefully you are getting some good feedback or switch therapists. I think people we encouraging supervision because if your daughter is truly supervised at ALL times the drinking, sex, ect wouldn't be happening. If it happened at school, call school, pull her out and figure out alternative. Anything to get her out of that poss situation ever arising again

Quoting juliaterirea:

My daughter is already in counseling. I do set boundaries for her and I do have rules. I work 2 jobs so I have a babysitter for her at all times. What usually happens is that when I drive her to school in the mornings, right after I leave she leave school and is with her boyfriend. I don't allow her to drink or smoke and I have grounded her for it. I do feel I'm being a parent, since I'm a single mother of 3 kids (14, 13 and 10 y.o.) I just feel its harder

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