Our dd is 16, and she just refuses to do anything. She'll lie in bed all day or on the couch unless we literally pick her up and stand behind her until she finishes the task. If we stop hounding her for even a second, she slinks off to go sit down again. We've tried punishments, rewards, a combination of the two, having group meetings with her psychiatrist and therapist, and it always goes back to the same thing. I've just been basically following her around all day.
Even if we do manage to get her up, she's screaming and whining. She wasn't this bad even as a toddler! I am NOT a lax mother, and she knows this kind of behavior is way out of bounds. When meeting with her psychiatrist, she promises to do better, but then as soon as he leaves she goes back to having full out tantrums.
I understand she's going through a really tough time, for reasons I won't mention, but so are my husband and I, with each other and her. She's incredibly irresponsible. We've tried the, "you're gonna act like a child, we'll treat you like one", and I'll admit, she was better, but I can't see how treating her like she's 6 for any extended period of time is going to create a productive adult.
Any suggestions? Maybe I need to look at it from another perspective. Thanks