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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

Money? Good or Bad ?

Posted by on Jul. 7, 2013 at 7:48 AM
  • 31 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Can money ruin a kid?

Options:

Yes

No


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Total Votes: 24

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 I married my current husband when my son was 4. I did not know that he was a millionaire until after we were married. From 4 to 13 we lived this lavish lifestyle. Now the money is gone, husband left me 50K in debt. And my son refuses to accept the fact that after I pay bills on the first of the month, I have $4.60 to do the rest of the month.

Do you think money can ruin a kid? I wish we had stayed in our little apartment with me working nights and happy. Than the misery I have now.

by on Jul. 7, 2013 at 7:48 AM
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Replies (1-10):
the3Rs
by Member on Jul. 7, 2013 at 8:03 AM
2 moms liked this
It's not the money that 'ruined' him. It's the way you acted/lived/etc. I am not rich by any stretch of the imagination, but I have a couple of friends who are. They do not live an outrageously lavish lifestyle, and their kids are well grounded, humble kids. If they lost everything tomorrow, they could adjust without too much difficulty.
Adexecmom
by on Jul. 7, 2013 at 8:16 AM
1 mom liked this

He's a teenager, which makes it worse.  Teens are all about image, and to admit to his peers that the expensive clothes and lavish vacations are over is beyond humiliating.  He needs a reality check and to realize what life is really like right now.  He also needs to know he's not the only one.  Thousands of upper middle class families have lost houses and cars and are on the verge of having nothing due to the economy.  He's just at a really tough age to have to deal with it.

atlmom2
by Susie on Jul. 7, 2013 at 8:39 AM
1 mom liked this
It can, but not my girls.
We are quite well off because we always scrimped and saved and saved early on.
Our girls are wonderful adults that were taught we came from nothing and they will have to make their own way. DD and her boyfriend live together and scrimp to save a little and don't have much to spend. They never have expected to live their adult lives how they grew up. They are well grounded.
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sahlady
by Gold Member on Jul. 7, 2013 at 9:40 AM
2 moms liked this
There is an area that feeds into our high school that is one of the wealthiest areas in the country. It isn't the money that ruins some kids it is the lifestyle the parents choose. We know some amazingly wealthy families whose kids are the salt if the earth and will be amazing adults. It is all about how you raise them.
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SAMI_JO
by on Jul. 7, 2013 at 10:04 AM

 We totally screwed up!

Not_A_Native
by Bronze Member on Jul. 7, 2013 at 10:27 AM

With the money "gone" - sounds like whatever you guys did was the problem.

We live a fairly lavish lifestyle by some standards, but my kids work, they take care of their stuff and so on.

How can "millions" be "gone?"

sabrtooth1
by on Jul. 7, 2013 at 10:56 AM
2 moms liked this
Quoting Adexecmom:  He's a teenager, which makes it worse.  Teens are all about image, and to admit to his peers that the expensive clothes and lavish vacations are over is beyond humiliating.

This is poppycock.  We are well off because we used our heads and worked our asses off.  And our kids still were clothed at Oscar De La Kmart, and Tarjhay.  It is ridiculous to spend a fortune on clothes that roll in the dirt, and are soon outgrown.  We went on many vacations, but my kids certainly knew the money for them did not grow on a shrub in the basement. 

They babysat beginning at 12, and had regular jobs as soon as legally possible.  They had a clothing allowance, and knew how much things cost.  If they spent $150 on a pair of shoes, OH WELL.  Then they either earned enough to buy other clothes, or they made do with what they had.  They supported their cellphones, cars, Ipods, etc.  They earned their own walking around money.

This is how they learn what it takes to have a good life, and that God helps those who help themselves!!!  Our kids got good educations, have good jobs, and are now able to afford their OWN homes, cars, clothes, and vacations.

There is always unexpected tragedy, but if you have a brain, you prepare for that.  There is NO reason children can't be taught good habits and values, regardless of financial circumstance.

02nana07
by Ida on Jul. 7, 2013 at 11:41 AM
1 mom liked this

 I have taught my kids how to manage money. 

When they want something they shop around and get the best deal, they use coupons and very seldom pay full price for anything.   

If they fall on hard times they know how to adjust,  If kids are taught to manage money and learn to live withing their means they will become better adults

drfink
by Emily on Jul. 7, 2013 at 11:54 AM
3 moms liked this

Having money doesn't ruin a kid.

Not learning to appreciate can ruin a kid.The feeling of entitlement ruins a kid.

boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Jul. 7, 2013 at 11:58 AM
1 mom liked this

Money doesn't ruin people.   If you lived a lavish lifestyle and never taught your son the value of money, that is the issue.       

I had no idea if my family was poor or wealthy when I was a kid.   My parents did not discuss their income.  I was a teen when my friends started commenting on our home decor, vacations and such.  I was often accused of being spoiled, but the truth was, I wasn't.     My siblings and I all had jobs in high school,  we did chores, we were taught to live on a budget...and save!




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