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Does this seem a little strange to you?

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I've been having a heck of a time with my 15 y/o son.  He has been sneaking out, drinking, and smoking pot.  I had to tackle him before he jumped out of a second story window a couple of weeks ago.  Bit by bit I took everything from him.  Cell phone, grounded to his room, no internet, no tv, no radio, it even got to the point where I took all of his cool clothes and replaced them with kakis and dress shirts and one pair of dorky sweats.  I kept all his shoes in the trunk of my car and only gave him one pair when we went somewhere.  

Last week he came back from his dad's and I was expecting more bad behavior.  He is usually much worse when he comes back from there. Heck, I even psyched myself up for it (Telling myself I can handle my son, I will be strong, I will be patient...)

He comes back a little sad, tells me that he isn't going to fight with me anymore because it stresses him and his little brother out.

Uh...Ok...that's awesome, honey.


It is now week two.  And he is perfect.  I asked him to take care of a few things last night and they were immediately done. No argument, no questions.  After being grounded for quite literally half of his summer break, he just did a complete 180.  Now I am really grateful, really...but should I be worried?

by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 11:58 AM
Replies (11-20):
v2011
by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 3:36 PM
OR maybe it was his grandmother. My ex's mom. She knew we were having problems and she loves that boy very much. Maybe she talked with him.
MrsBLB
by Missi on Jul. 16, 2013 at 4:49 PM

Could be that, or maybe he just wants to be a better person.  Either way, accept it graciously, but cautiously.  Good luck!

Quoting v2011:

OR maybe it was his grandmother. My ex's mom. She knew we were having problems and she loves that boy very much. Maybe she talked with him.


v2011
by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 5:33 PM

I accept I accept :)

luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on Jul. 16, 2013 at 8:09 PM

Enjoy it, hopefully it will last!

bizzeemom2717
by Jen on Jul. 16, 2013 at 8:43 PM

My guess would be that his dad was a jerk and he is more appreciative now?

PurpleHazey
by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 6:40 AM

I would have never gone as far as putting his shoes in your truck. Not sure but it sounds like he has a lot of things "spoiled" maybe he is starting to grow up....Good Luck.

Medusa686
by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 10:49 AM

Either his dad spoke with him or something happened to make his turn things around and it must be something pretty significant. I won't worry, this is what you want. 

Barabell
by Barbara on Jul. 17, 2013 at 12:38 PM

Wonderful turn around! Definitely sound like he had an epiphany!

v2011
by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 2:11 PM

Quoting bizzeemom2717:

My guess would be that his dad was a jerk and he is more appreciative now?


Oops I read this wrong at first. I hope he sees how his father is, but that is a determination he will have to make for himself. I do my best to vent on here about my ex and not to my boys. I just want them to be kids and not have the pressure of being in the middle of the disagreeing parents.
deb51980
by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 2:13 PM

Make very, very sure you verbalize appreciation.  That has much more effect that complaining or acting in responsive to bad behavior. 

I hope you have started on the process of easing back on the punishments.  Perhaps ask him what one thing he most wishes to have restored.

Have a talk with younger son.  Get him on board with suspending any retaliation and mad mouthinhing, to wait and see what develops.


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