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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

moms..... please tell me Im not the only one having this issue.

Posted by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 10:23 AM
  • 9 Replies

 17 days we leave to move our oldest into the dorms.  Her moods are off the chart.  She is gone more than she is here, each time having her one last time with friends.  We will start a conversation and she will be sweet, happy, excited but when I ask her to do something college, packing, moving related she all the sudden get defensiveand snaps at me.  Rationally I understand that she is nervous even if she doesnt recognize it..... but it is getting really hard to deal with.  I have corrected her and we are trying some new communication techniques... but my heart is so flip'n heavy right now.

 

by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 10:23 AM
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Replies (1-9):
HilbillyMamaof3
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 10:32 AM
I've not been in this situation, but have read post similar to this. Hopefully she will snap out of it, hugs your way.
atlmom2
by Susie on Jul. 31, 2013 at 10:32 AM
Ask her what is up? Mine never acted that way but doesn't mean it isn't normal. Just tell her she should talk issues out and not snap at you for asking simple questions. Sounds like you are doing all you can. Count down the days, lol.
Got 18 days till dd moves in for her sophomore year.
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sahlady
by Gold Member on Jul. 31, 2013 at 10:37 AM

 I know whats up.... she is nervous. 

We travel, but I wouldnt say we were well traveled.  She has been away from home, but never for longer than 2 weeks.  So I think she is just nervous to be so far away on her own.  Luckily she is very out going so it shouldnt take long for her to build a network of friends.  And she has been texting and talking with her roommate for a couple months now.  But still this is HUGE for her.

Quoting atlmom2:

Ask her what is up? Mine never acted that way but doesn't mean it isn't normal. Just tell her she should talk issues out and not snap at you for asking simple questions. Sounds like you are doing all you can. Count down the days, lol.
Got 18 days till dd moves in for her sophomore year.

 

mamavalor
by Member on Jul. 31, 2013 at 10:40 AM

I think she wants to prolong the time she has with you all.  It's very stressful to pack and to say good-bye to your family, the life you have always known.  Hug her often, say you love her and let her do her thing. 

I still get snappy every time I'm about to leave my folks' house after a long visit.  My parents used to snap back/correct my behavior but then quickly understood that I acted that way because I didn't want to leave but had to.  Their love and understanding have made my departures more bearable and I look forward to coming back to visit, often. 

atlmom2
by Susie on Jul. 31, 2013 at 10:42 AM
My dd is 7 hours away. We are near Milwaukee. She goes to U of Dayton. This dd is quiet and still made oodles of friends the first week. Your dd sounds like my oldest. Super outgoing!!
My dd had the worst roommate and still didn't have a bad freshman year. She is excited to havfe a quad with 3 friends.


Quoting sahlady:

 I know whats up.... she is nervous. 


We travel, but I wouldnt say we were well traveled.  She has been away from home, but never for longer than 2 weeks.  So I think she is just nervous to be so far away on her own.  Luckily she is very out going so it shouldnt take long for her to build a network of friends.  And she has been texting and talking with her roommate for a couple months now.  But still this is HUGE for her.


Quoting atlmom2:

Ask her what is up? Mine never acted that way but doesn't mean it isn't normal. Just tell her she should talk issues out and not snap at you for asking simple questions. Sounds like you are doing all you can. Count down the days, lol.
Got 18 days till dd moves in for her sophomore year.

 


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MrsBLB
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 1:20 PM

I haven't been in this situation.  Hugs to you.

bribren
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 3:59 PM

My daughter is going through the same thing. She is excited about college and moving into the dorm one minute and freaking out the next.I sent her to Montana for the summer to spend time with her grandparents and now she is really ready to move on to the next exciting chapter in her life. She just need a little space and time to come to grips with growing up.

drfink
by Emily on Jul. 31, 2013 at 5:23 PM

I have had something like this with my older two.They are generally happy ,even tempered people but the summer before college started the mood shift was quick and at times I knew even less than ever before ever..ever...ever...LOL Then the next second they were back to their selves.Some friends and I whined and wined to each other about it ...wine helps...and we think this behavior helps with the loosening of the ties.How much our teens are willing to admit it varies but they are excited ,thrilled and worried.Once they left things with them got back quickly to normal and I even got smarter suddenly ...at least in their eyes.For us each summer gets a tiny bit like this as we get closer to the start of college.I think this is more along the lines it gets a little old being a kid again when they have been so independent at school.

It is hard when we ...at least for me...so much want their last summer before college to this warm ,close time before they step out in a big way and they don't co-operate 100%  ; ) I laugh at my fantasy now but with my oldest it was really tough at times.With my poor daughter ...oh my ,her brother was deployed ,my youngest was starting middle school and she was going 700 miles away to school.My home sweet home fantasy was huge ...but she still loves me.

boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Jul. 31, 2013 at 11:18 PM

Sounds normal.   My guys went to college locally and stayed at home, but the mood swings were present.   They had friends leaving for out of state colleges and that added to the mix.

Maybe you can ask your DD to set a date to focus on packing?




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