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Would your teen daughters date a boy in a younger grade??

Posted by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 10:28 AM
  • 21 Replies

My dd is 14 and so is her boyfriend.  She's actually 4 months older than him.  Because of his B-day being after the cut off and getting held back in elementary school when he was little he is 2 grades behind her. She starts 10th grade next month and he starts 8th.  She likes the kid alot and he's a good kid.  However the news of them being together is starting to make the rounds and she's starting to catch some crap  for it.  She says she doesn't care but i'm wondering if your dd's would date a boy in a younger grade?

by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 10:28 AM
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Replies (1-10):
boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Aug. 22, 2013 at 10:37 AM

I don't have a daughter, only sons.     But, I do think that 2 grades behind at that age is a lot.




MrsBLB
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 10:49 AM

I don't think it's too big of a deal.  Mine weren't allowed to date at that age tho.

TranquilMind
by Bronze Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 12:43 PM

 Yes, 4 months is fine.  She will probably feel like she has to explain that though, and that she is not dating a little 8th grader. 

I'm not really comfortable with 14 year olds dating, though, so it would be supervised, group activities for me.

atlmom2
by Susie on Aug. 22, 2013 at 12:49 PM
14 is too young. Mine were older. Dd was a senior. Her boyfriend was a junior.
10th and 8th grade is way to large of gap. 8th graders don't need to thinking about dating. I doubt he is super mature. Maybe I am wrong.
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Niccalyn
by Bronze Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 1:18 PM

I am assuming that by 'dating,' what you mean is that they tell other kids they are dating, and they see each other in group settings, and perhaps he comes over occasionally and hangs out with her in the family room watching TV. This is the type of 'dating' my oldest did back then.  She is now 16 and a Junior in HS.  When she turned 16 we started allowing her to go on the occasional one-on-one date (to the movies, to play putt putt, etc), but for the most part, she 'dates' in groups.  Anyway, she has dated a boy who was a few months younger than her, although in the same grade (he has a summer birthday, while hers is in December).  It didn't work out for them, although they have stayed good friends, primarily because his immature behavior became annoying to her.  I wouldn't prevent her from dating a younger boy, but just be ready when she decides to call it quits!

lucky2Beeme
by Gold Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 2:29 PM

I dont have a DD both my sons dated  girls  1 yr older than they are all through HS.

luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 5:13 PM
Mine weren't allowed to date at that age. When they could date they couldn't date anyone older then them or younger then them, by a year.

I can say kids, regardless of age, tend to act the age of those around them. My dd was much older then most kids in her grade (long story) and she never acted her age. Her friends were all younger so that's how she acted.

I don't see a problem though if she's okay with it. My girls liked the guys to be older though.

littlelamb303
by Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 5:43 PM

My dd did not date a younger boy, but she was very good friends with one that was a year and half younger.  They spent a lot of time together, but he wanted more in the relationship, and she just enjoyed the friendship .  Obviously, the friendship did not last and she was crushed, because she really thought of him as a good friend, but did not want him as a boyfriend . A year and half difference at this age does make a difference.  Four months not so much.

bexsmum
by Bronze Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 6:32 PM

DD did date younger and older. Her long term now ex was 5 months younger but they were in the same grade. The biggest difference was when she was 20 and dating an 18 yr old male.

sabrtooth1
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 7:07 PM

When my kids were 14, they were not dating ANYONE.  When they were 16, they would NOT have dated someone 2 grades behind them, because the intellectual difference would have been too much.  More than 2 years OLDER, at that age, is too much also.

For the record, my Dh is 16 months younger than me, but we did not start dating till I was a rising COLLEGE jr.

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