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carpooling

Posted by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:13 PM
  • 5 Replies

We have new neighbours and our 14 yo girls are in sports together. They moved in in June & we are trying to work something out with carpooling with sports activities & nothing has been set in stone. We just have our girls or us moms txt/call each other to set something up. I think this is ok so we can see if it will all work out but I am a person who likes things organized so I know what will be... but I also know maybe we are just trying this to see if our families are a match for carpooling. Is this how it works for you and carpooling? Have you started out not with a basic plan (like one family takes 1 week, then the other family takes the next week & so on? So far it's worked out but it's been really one-sided becuz I'm doing more definitely (cuz I'm so... nice, such a sucker) lol. I am getting up at 5:15 each morning now for almost a week taking them to school cross country by 6 am. There was even a time a week ago when I asked the Mom if she could pick up my daughter after soccer because I had a visit planned with some friends out of town.  She said yes, but then her daughter told mine in school (that day...) that she wasn't going to soccer that she had something else.  The Mom didn't call me to tell me or anything, just left us hanging.  My daughter called my husband & he came to pick her up. What is a good way to try to make it more even? Should I just not text/call & just see if they offer?? Now, I find out she just got a job. I will have more carpooling since I'm not working yet, looking for a job tho (oh, maybe I should have sucked it up and just worked another year in the schools) oh, but I was getting sick all the time, etc. so I decided after 5 yrs to hang it up. I think I will wait & see if they offer to carpool, we have been doing so much more & we don't know when they will volunteer. Oh.... I'm going on & on, sorry. I think I'm doomed to being this way.... ha! It's so hard to change & when I do I seem to fall back into my old patterns (giving too much, even tho I'm not working), why is it always me?! How do you handle this so you aren't taken advantage of?

by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:13 PM
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Replies (1-5):
sabrtooth1
by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:19 PM

No one held a gun to your head, and forced you to take the other kid.  If you don't want to, or can't, then STOP.  Personally, I would NOT have even begun carpooling with someone I just met, and did not know completely.  I would not trust MY kids with strangers, and would not ask them to trust THEIR child with me. 

cat4458
by Bronze Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:34 PM
No, we have known the family for many years. We would not trust anyone we don't know. They just moved to our subdivision. I was ok with carpooling at first till now I feel kinda taken advantage of.
Quoting sabrtooth1:

No one held a gun to your head, and forced you to take the other kid.  If you don't want to, or can't, then STOP.  Personally, I would NOT have even begun carpooling with someone I just met, and did not know completely.  I would not trust MY kids with strangers, and would not ask them to trust THEIR child with me. 


MrsBLB
by Missi on Aug. 28, 2013 at 12:47 PM
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I would suggest trading off weeks if you continue to carpool.  Good luck  :)

Txlisa7969
by Bronze Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 2:58 PM

I would just tell them that you need a concrete schedule so that you know who needs to be where ahead of time.  Ask them if a week on week off schedule would work for them.  If not then if you are going to continue to do the larger share of the driving they need to kick in for gas.  I had something similar happen last year with my ODD's band practices.  A friend of hers mother started assuming I could just give her daugther rides since it was on my way and I have a van.  I told her after the third time either she needed to trade out with me or pony up some gas money. 

1kidmomajm
by Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 8:50 PM

Speak up, tell her how you need it to be, aske what her needs are. You wouldnt want to leave her daughter stranded. Concrete plan for sure, swap phone numbers.

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