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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

What should be the punishment? - Updated

Posted by on Oct. 19, 2013 at 10:51 AM
  • 31 Replies

Thanks Everyone! 

For those who missed my reply regarding him doing his own laundry, rest assured he does know how to do his own laundry and does it whenever I ask.  It just so happened that I was doing laundry that day and didn't mind throwing his in as it was only 1/2 a basket.  And for the record, my10 year old is learning how to do his laundry and has done it a few times with supervision.  All 3 boys have been folding/putting away their own clothes for years.

Regardless of WHO is doing the laundry though, all 3 boys know to empty their own pockets - and usually do.

I decided to not really punish him, but I'm no longer agreeing to do his laundry when it's convenient for the next month.  For that month it's 100% his responsibility.  After that we'll revert to how we've been doing it all along.

As for the phone, it was so cheap because we bought it with his upgrade.  That was back in the Spring and he's not eligible for another upgrade, so we'd need to spend almost $200 for the full price phone.  If we cancel his service, we have to pay the remaining months as a fee.  We have no old phones to activate.  DH and I are eligible for upgrade, so we'll be doing a cross upgrade with DH's phone that will activate with DS's number.  This means DH has to wait until 2015 for his upgrade, but he doesn't really care.

Thanks again for all of your advice!

---------------------------

My boys - all 3 of them (14, 9, 7) - know that when they want me to do their laundry, they put their basket in the laundry room.  They KNOW that it is their responsibility to empty the pockets as I won't do it.

Well, this morning my 14 yo put his basket in the laundry room.  It was only 1/2 full, so rather than pull out each piece, I just dumped the whole basket in.  If I had pulled out each piece I probably would have noticed it...and would have taken it out...but I didn't notice it.

What is "it" you ask?  His CELL PHONE.  Yup.  Went through the entire wash.

So...we didn't have any rice laying around and we put it in the freezer as different sites recommended...though it might just be too late.

I'm SO frustrated...he is in a lot of after school activities, so I don't want him to be without a phone (yes I know we all did it as kids - but I also had change on my and used the pay phone all the time...we have no pay phones anymore).

So...what would you do (besides not getting him another phone) to punish? 

(by the way - it's not a smartphone and it cost me 5 cents to buy)

by on Oct. 19, 2013 at 10:51 AM
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Replies (1-10):
atlmom2
by Susie on Oct. 19, 2013 at 12:05 PM
He needs to pay for it. 14 yo should be doing his own laundry anyway
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natural_s
by Bronze Member on Oct. 19, 2013 at 12:15 PM

 

I agree, he needs to work for another phone especially if you have told him over and over again to dump his pockets.

I also agree at that age have him start washing his own clothes and let him be solely responsible for his items or clothes getting messed up because that is what is going to happen when he gets out there on his own.

My teens use to do the same thing, my daughter now washes her own clothes and my son will start  learning on his upcoming birthday where he will be turning 14.

Quoting atlmom2:

He needs to pay for it. 14 yo should be doing his own laundry anyway


 

drfink
by Emily on Oct. 19, 2013 at 12:21 PM

 We keep our old phones.This hasn't happened but they have lost them due to carelessness.They can figure how to buy a phone using allowance money or they get the oldest phone we have so that we can have communication.Each kid has done this ,each kid got stuck with....the horror.....LOL.... an old phone ,didn't happen again.

02nana07
by Ida on Oct. 19, 2013 at 12:31 PM

 go to a yard sale or thrift store to get him a basic phone no camera or other features one that just makes phone calls.  He pays for it and the service for it either with cash or by working it off this will help him remember the next time.  

the3Rs
by Member on Oct. 19, 2013 at 12:41 PM
Thanks. So, to be clear he does know how to do his own laundry, and he does do it whenever I ask him to. It just so happened that I was doing it this time.

Quoting natural_s:

 


I agree, he needs to work for another phone especially if you have told him over and over again to dump his pockets.


I also agree at that age have him start washing his own clothes and let him be solely responsible for his items or clothes getting messed up because that is what is going to happen when he gets out there on his own.


My teens use to do the same thing, my daughter now washes her own clothes and my son will start  learning on his upcoming birthday where he will be turning 14.


Quoting atlmom2:

He needs to pay for it. 14 yo should be doing his own laundry anyway



 

natural_s
by Bronze Member on Oct. 19, 2013 at 12:49 PM

 

Oh okay. My daughter does the same thing when I am washing clothes and she wants something washed, lol.

Teenagers can drive you crazy, lol.

Your welcome.

Quoting the3Rs:

Thanks. So, to be clear he does know how to do his own laundry, and he does do it whenever I ask him to. It just so happened that I was doing it this time.

Quoting natural_s:

 


I agree, he needs to work for another phone especially if you have told him over and over again to dump his pockets.


I also agree at that age have him start washing his own clothes and let him be solely responsible for his items or clothes getting messed up because that is what is going to happen when he gets out there on his own.


My teens use to do the same thing, my daughter now washes her own clothes and my son will start  learning on his upcoming birthday where he will be turning 14.


Quoting atlmom2:

He needs to pay for it. 14 yo should be doing his own laundry anyway

 


 


 

Caitlin10081989
by on Oct. 19, 2013 at 1:03 PM

I wouldn't give him a punishment. His punishment is not having a cell phone now. From now on if your doing the laundry check the pockets to make sure nothing is in them. 

the3Rs
by Member on Oct. 19, 2013 at 1:19 PM
1 mom liked this
Thanks, but I've already decided he needs a cell so that can't really be a punishment. And no, I won't dig through their dirty laundry for stuff in their pockets. I've taught them very early on to do that for themselves and most of the time (obviously not in this case, lol) it's a non-issue & there's no problem.

Quoting Caitlin10081989:

I wouldn't give him a punishment. His punishment is not having a cell phone now. From now on if your doing the laundry check the pockets to make sure nothing is in them. 

Caitlin10081989
by on Oct. 19, 2013 at 2:00 PM


Have him earn the money to pay for his own cellphone if you feel he needs one. 

Quoting the3Rs:

Thanks, but I've already decided he needs a cell so that can't really be a punishment. And no, I won't dig through their dirty laundry for stuff in their pockets. I've taught them very early on to do that for themselves and most of the time (obviously not in this case, lol) it's a non-issue & there's no problem.

Quoting Caitlin10081989:

I wouldn't give him a punishment. His punishment is not having a cell phone now. From now on if your doing the laundry check the pockets to make sure nothing is in them. 



the3Rs
by Member on Oct. 19, 2013 at 2:49 PM

Good plan!

Quoting Caitlin10081989:


Have him earn the money to pay for his own cellphone if you feel he needs one. 

Quoting the3Rs:

Thanks, but I've already decided he needs a cell so that can't really be a punishment. And no, I won't dig through their dirty laundry for stuff in their pockets. I've taught them very early on to do that for themselves and most of the time (obviously not in this case, lol) it's a non-issue & there's no problem.

Quoting Caitlin10081989:

I wouldn't give him a punishment. His punishment is not having a cell phone now. From now on if your doing the laundry check the pockets to make sure nothing is in them. 




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