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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

I have two very different teen boys. Need advice on one of them.

Posted by on Oct. 20, 2013 at 12:22 PM
  • 18 Replies

My oldest is 16 and is a very good kid. Now my 15 year old. Is a different. He's cussing having sex and chewing. I have him in counseling but it doesn't seem to be working. Any advice.Thanks


by on Oct. 20, 2013 at 12:22 PM
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Replies (1-10):
atlmom2
by Susie on Oct. 20, 2013 at 1:08 PM
What punishments do you give for chewing? When is he alone and having sex???
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
my2kidsmom9498
by Bronze Member on Oct. 20, 2013 at 1:59 PM

Are there consequences for his actions?   Where is he getting the chewing tobacco?  Is he having sex at your place?  It sounds like he needs a lot more supervision.

drfink
by Emily on Oct. 20, 2013 at 4:21 PM

 There needs to be consequences as well as counselling.Talk with the counselor and ask some advice for consequences of action that the counselor will think will be effective.My clients did best when there was consequences along with therapy.Counseling or therapy does NOT negate the need for consequences.

bexsmum
by Bronze Member on Oct. 20, 2013 at 5:13 PM

I have 3 boys 1 girl. Teens cuss although most often not around the parental units. I would remind him he's not the court or playing field and to mind his mouth as soap doesn't taste very good. That being said DD has the mouth of a sailor but so does her mama. Although I have learned to temper it as I have grown older. This is one of the negatives of my kids growing up on a military base,one of the very few negatives I might add.  Okay he is having sex,is it safe sex and is it with a girlfriend he has been with for a while. If he is just hooking up with randoms on a regular basis the biy needs a talking to about respecting women and himself. Ask him would he want his sister, if he had one around a guy like him. I find guys that have sisters be it younger or older tend to treat the girls how they would want thier sisters treated for the most part. As fot eh chewing get some very very grafic photos of mouth and toungue cancer scare the living shit out of him.

Barabell
by Barbara on Oct. 20, 2013 at 6:20 PM

I also want to know what kind of consequences you've already tried. Please update us with that.

Barabell
by Barbara on Oct. 20, 2013 at 6:21 PM

These are some important points too, and I like the suggestion of showing him the consequences of his actions (like the pictures of cancer from chewing).

Quoting bexsmum:

I have 3 boys 1 girl. Teens cuss although most often not around the parental units. I would remind him he's not the court or playing field and to mind his mouth as soap doesn't taste very good. That being said DD has the mouth of a sailor but so does her mama. Although I have learned to temper it as I have grown older. This is one of the negatives of my kids growing up on a military base,one of the very few negatives I might add.  Okay he is having sex,is it safe sex and is it with a girlfriend he has been with for a while. If he is just hooking up with randoms on a regular basis the biy needs a talking to about respecting women and himself. Ask him would he want his sister, if he had one around a guy like him. I find guys that have sisters be it younger or older tend to treat the girls how they would want thier sisters treated for the most part. As fot eh chewing get some very very grafic photos of mouth and toungue cancer scare the living shit out of him.


mumsy2three
by Shauna on Oct. 20, 2013 at 6:40 PM


Quoting my2kidsmom9498:

Are there consequences for his actions?   Where is he getting the chewing tobacco?  Is he having sex at your place?  It sounds like he needs a lot more supervision.

I was going to ask the same questions.

my2kidsmom9498
by Bronze Member on Oct. 20, 2013 at 7:08 PM

Great minds think a like!


Quoting mumsy2three:


Quoting my2kidsmom9498:

Are there consequences for his actions?   Where is he getting the chewing tobacco?  Is he having sex at your place?  It sounds like he needs a lot more supervision.

I was going to ask the same questions.



bizzeemom2717
by Jen on Oct. 20, 2013 at 8:09 PM
Yep was going to ask what punishments you have tried so far then can give more feedback

Quoting my2kidsmom9498:

Great minds think a like!



Quoting mumsy2three:


Quoting my2kidsmom9498:

Are there consequences for his actions?   Where is he getting the chewing tobacco?  Is he having sex at your place?  It sounds like he needs a lot more supervision.

I was going to ask the same questions.




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Ann7227
by on Oct. 21, 2013 at 12:27 PM

He is a freshman and someone from the high school is getting it for him. We tried the your a man way. Made him do a big chew with no spiting it out . He got sick and said he wouldn't do it again. we where wrong . His dad chews and he also taking his cans. So now we have it hidden . What happen was my mom was here sent him out to take out the trash . He knew his dad was on his way home from work. My husband came home and he wasn't in the house he went to go find him. And caught him and the girl in the act in a shed. We sent him to my moms for the night. Took away his phone and Ipod. Their both gone. He won't get them back. He has adhd and odd. It's been getting worse. Not sure if it's he's hormones or him just rebelling. We told him if he messes up one more time he's gone. His stuff is packed. Not sure what else to do.

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