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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

Anybody have a teen that met a "friend" online and now wants to meet in person?

Posted by on Nov. 2, 2013 at 9:29 PM
  • 19 Replies

So my daughter (14) met a girl on some website and they have been chatting and texting each other daily for about 6 months now. They want to meet in a public place because they consider each other really good friends. My daughter has been open with me from the beginning and has shown me pics of her. She came to me and asked if I could drive her to a mall to meet her. The problem I am struggling with is she wants to go off and walk around with her by herself. Typical teenager doesn't want her mom to crowd her. But I really feel uneasy doing this because I feel like an overprotective mother. I worry about the worst. She said that her friends mom can call me and we can talk about it BUT i feel that it wouldn't make a difference because I don't know her personally. Please give me advice and opinions on how I should handle this situation.

by on Nov. 2, 2013 at 9:29 PM
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Replies (1-10):
boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Nov. 2, 2013 at 10:06 PM
5 moms liked this

Call the Mom and talk to her.   Invite her and her daughter to meet with you and your daughter for lunch at the mall.    You can all have lunch together and then the girls can wander around while you and the other Mom chat.




wondergirl
by Member on Nov. 2, 2013 at 10:17 PM

My daughters have met up with girls that they have usually met very briefly at an event and then chatted more with online. Depending on the situation, I would be ok talking with the other girls mom and meeting briefly and then letting the girls go off on their own. Unless I had some reason to be concerned, I think I would probably skip the whole lunch thing and maybe just do some shopping on my own. I know it's important to be cautious and you know your own kid but sometimes I think we can be a bit overprotective. Also, however, I must add, that I monitor my girls online chats pretty closely, so I have a pretty good idea about the other girl before we ever meet.

GleekingOut
by Silver Member on Nov. 3, 2013 at 12:19 AM
I don't allow my kids to meet anyone they meet online in real life. Even my eldest (21) must be able to tell me how she knows someone if I ask her or she looses the internet for a week.
annabl1970
by Member on Nov. 3, 2013 at 1:14 AM
No way!
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annabl1970
by Member on Nov. 3, 2013 at 1:15 AM
1 mom liked this
Do you know some predators work as a couple? that girl could be a crime partner who help to lure a victims.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Lorelai_Nicole
by Lorelai on Nov. 3, 2013 at 3:54 AM
1 mom liked this

My DD hasn't, but I have when I was younger. I started chatting with a girl in a trivia chatroom when I was about 17 or so, and I invited her to my birthday party. It was at a public place, so I wasn't worried. Another girl, I haven't technically met her yet, but we've been talking online and on the phone for the last, like, 11 years. She started out as my brother's online girlfriend, and then we started talking and now we're really good friends. We want to meet really bad, but she lives in TX and I'm in CA. Someday!

As far as your DD's situation, I would allow the meet-up, but talk to the other mom first. Arrange to meet at the food court and get to know each other first, before letting the girls wander the mall together. If you start getting a bad feeling, call it off.

Alexis Emma 10-13-1999 - 14 years old
Kirsten Leslie 03-14-2004 - 9 years old
Sarah Mackenzie 08-14-2007 - 5 years old
Charlotte Amelia & Harmon David 04-12-2012 - 18 months old
Angela Victoria 06-09-1996 - 17 years old (niece) 

fammatthews4
by Trisha on Nov. 3, 2013 at 7:02 AM
I think I would have the girl meet us in the mall for lunch first then I could kind of check her out. Then if I felt it was ok I'd let the girls walk around together.
ConnieBonjiovi
by on Nov. 3, 2013 at 9:54 AM

This girl she met is in a different state so they have been talking and planning a date that they can meet. Her friend is willing to drive to our state to meet. She is 16. I don't know if her mom was going to come also. I believe my daughter said she was though. Meeting for lunch all together would be fine but if her mom doesn't come then I don't know!

02nana07
by Ida on Nov. 3, 2013 at 10:40 AM

 My boys have but they both went and me and husband were in the building all 4 of us had cell phones.  It was at a gaming convention where they met

notjstanothrmom
by on Nov. 3, 2013 at 10:42 AM

I would let them meet, they're already in contact and obviously know a lot about one another. I would however require both parents be there. Maybe do something that you could all go to in a close area but they could have their own time too? A movie and you and Mom sit a few rows ahead or behind? 

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