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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

Should I/Would you interfere?

Posted by on Nov. 6, 2013 at 10:44 PM
  • 23 Replies
There's this boy in my daughter's transition to High School class who will not leave her alone. He's been antagonizing her since day one.
examples: teacher brought up racism. She was trying to show that it can affect you no matter what color your skin is. So she asked if my daughter agreed. Next thing you know he's telling students my daughter is racist!
Today he decided it would be funny to delete some of her school work in the computer. Then in another class he started telling my daughter's friend that my daughter was a bitch and mean.
So now my daughter was almost in tears and ready to just walk out of class.
The teacher won't move their seats because "my daughter is a good role model for him and also my daughter will learn to deal with difficult people"!
My daughter is already dealing with depression issues and is seeing a therapist.
This boy keeps pushing her and she's likely to snap and slap the crap out of him.
I want my daughter to talk to her guidance counselor, maybe he can get the teacher to separate them. The teacher really likes my daughter and vice versa. I just don't think she realizes how difficult this is for my daughter.
by on Nov. 6, 2013 at 10:44 PM
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Replies (1-10):
drfink
by Emily on Nov. 7, 2013 at 12:03 AM

First off deleting school work off a computer is not appropriate.I don't see how a teacher would call that learning to deal with difficult people.

I would schedule a chat with the teacher and follow up with an email just wanting to follow the discussion.Remind the teacher that being a good influence should not come at a cost to your daughter.Just as every student deserves not to be harassed or have work deleted so does your daughter.

If that doesn't work copy the email and write a new one to her grade level dean or a.p.

Jinx-Troublex3
by Bronze Member on Nov. 7, 2013 at 12:27 AM
I would go Momma Bear on the teacher and involve the counselor and the Principal.

My DH said to me,"Im glad you homeschool the kids but they miss out on learning how to deal with bullies and kids in school. I was picked on and CARRIED A GUN TO SCHOOL EVERYDAY and the kids knew I carried so they didn't mess with me. Our kids will have no idea of street smarts."

I was aghast! REALLY??? I am scarring our kids becaise they don't have bullies in our small sharter school??? I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
bizzeemom2717
by on Nov. 7, 2013 at 1:02 AM
3 moms liked this
Your daughter has done the right thing by going to the teacher with zero help there the next step is for you to contact the guidance counselor, principal and teacher all in one email with your concerns and how you would like the situation resolved. Your dd has every right to get away from this bully. Ask what the school bully policy is? CC everyone in the email so the teacher KNOWS you are contacting everyone up the chain of command and make sure to state dates and times your daughter went to the teacher to have this resolved and received no help. Good luck I would do this ASAP if it was my daughter and I'm not usually a fan of rescuing but since she already tried and this kid is a BLATANT bully it's a bunch of BS IMO
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fantasticfour
by Grumpy on Nov. 7, 2013 at 7:50 AM
Would I interfere? ABSOLUTELY. Teacher needs a reality check. So does the kid.
atlmom2
by Susie on Nov. 7, 2013 at 7:55 AM
He is a bully. You need to go higher up.
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Msgme
by Silver Member on Nov. 7, 2013 at 8:58 AM

Wow you would expect with all the anti bullying stuff going on and how much awarness the subject has gotten that teachers would be quicker to deal with it.  There is a difference between a difficult person and a bully and he is a bully.   I would have a chat with the teacher and bring along the guidance counselor and principal.

When my son was in 3rd grade he was being bullied by several boys, one in paticular who was  pretty bad and had resorted to physical bullying.  I had always (up to that point) taught my son not to fight and to tell the teacher etc.... When that didnt work I went up to talk to the teaher and she told me she was aware of the problem but that there was nothing she could do about it and pehaps i should speak to the boys  mom.

02nana07
by Ida on Nov. 7, 2013 at 10:22 AM

 I would because I had a boy like that in class and I got in big trouble because I snapped when he called me a b**** I showed him one it took several guys to pull me off of him but he never bothered me again after that.

PurpleHazey
by on Nov. 7, 2013 at 10:22 AM

I would have a meeting with the school

PurpleHazey
by on Nov. 7, 2013 at 10:23 AM

 


Quoting 02nana07:

 I would because I had a boy like that in class and I got in big trouble because I snapped when he called me a b**** I showed him one it took several guys to pull me off of him but he never bothered me again after that.


 Wow you go girl

Saphira1207
by Member on Nov. 7, 2013 at 10:48 AM

This may seem like bullying but I also see an element of normal boy-has-a-crush-on-the-girl behavior too.  He clearly wants to get her attention and is doing what ever he thinks will do the trick.  In a few instances he's gone to far, granted, but mostly I see a crush thing.  I'd confront him about it.  ALLLLL of it.  And I'd make it clear that his behavior stops or the authorities (principal, his parents, etc. ) will be called in to deal with him.

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