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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

In Desperate Need Of Advice ASAP!!

Posted by on Feb. 12, 2014 at 3:14 PM
  • 17 Replies

I have a 15 year old daughter that is very defiant.

She is rude, disrespectful, failing all her classes in school, her friends are bad friends that are into cutting class and smoking and drinking.

I have her in a program that is for children with behavior issues. That is not even helping because she ended up dating a girl that is in the program so she is on the verge of getting kicked out of the program.

She is cutting classes and getting written up all the time now, she is not doing homework, and she is very manipulative and is a big liar.

She comes off as such a sweet child and yes that she is as long as you do not correct when she is wrong, catch her in a lie or so forth. Once that occurs you are on her bad side.She will curse you out and try to provoke you to fight her and ahh!

She has stopped doing chores at home, is not showering, she just turns on the water and lets it run.

Me and my husband try talking to her which is not her dad but pretty much is because he has been in her life for 7 straight years. We have even tried to get other family members to talk to her nad no use. This is her 3rd program and still the same results and she is getting worse each day!

Which is also causing a big toll on my household because I have two younger children one other daughter that is 8 and a son that is 5 years old. They see the confusion with her and I see that my 8 year old is now trying to copy off of her nad I have to let her know that it is not cool what her sister is doing and so forth.

Does anyone know what I can do? I am located in New Jersey if anyone knows of something!!

by on Feb. 12, 2014 at 3:14 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Doctorsherlock
by on Feb. 12, 2014 at 3:27 PM
1 mom liked this

I would ground her, make her come stright home from school, if you give her allowance take it away, tell her she can't hang with the kids she is hanging out with now, make her do chores and don't let her get away with anything. Maybe look into some group therapy or something of that sorts.

Cgrant81
by on Feb. 12, 2014 at 4:26 PM

Thank you for the reply and I have literally tried all the above that you mentioned and nothing is working, each day she is just getting worse and more worse. Just got a phone call that hse cut 4 classes today and then she did not come home after school then called me a half hour later to say she missed the bus and will take the late bus.

owlfeather919
by on Feb. 12, 2014 at 9:00 PM
Follow her to her classes, that might help. Maybe after a day or two of you stalking her, she will go on her own and stay there lol. good luck Momma :)

Quoting Cgrant81:

Thank you for the reply and I have literally tried all the above that you mentioned and nothing is working, each day she is just getting worse and more worse. Just got a phone call that hse cut 4 classes today and then she did not come home after school then called me a half hour later to say she missed the bus and will take the late bus.

Jenniy
by Member on Feb. 12, 2014 at 9:01 PM
Military school? Idk, good luck!
OvrMyHead
by Member on Feb. 12, 2014 at 9:34 PM
Has she had a psychological svaluation? She may need some sort if medication. Get the school involved, talk to the counselors there, try to get some help through your county. You may try checking her into a mental facility for an evaluation or if she gets out of hand. Tell the county that she is at the point where you may not be able to keep her in your home.
woodswalker
by Member on Feb. 12, 2014 at 9:36 PM
1 mom liked this

Counseling!   And yes, if my child were skipping classes, I would be going to school and escorting them to class, sign in with principal and make sure each teacher signs something that says they were there that day.  

OHgirlinCA
by Bronze Member on Feb. 12, 2014 at 9:40 PM
Is she in any extracurricular activities? If not... Find some that she may enjoy. It may give her some focus.
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boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on Feb. 12, 2014 at 11:24 PM

I would look into boot camp type programs.      I would not allow her to eat at the table without being clean.   Of course, my answer to not showering is a garden hose!      As for school, attend her classes with her.   Hopefully, it will embarrass her to have her Mom with her all day, every day.




lazyd
by Bronze Member on Feb. 13, 2014 at 12:53 PM

Send her to the nearest psych ward for as long as it takes!  Seriously!  My 15yo daughter spent 3 days in one and has learned a lot and will do everything and anything to NOT get sent back there!!!  

woodswalker
by Member on Feb. 13, 2014 at 5:45 PM

Also, I recommend getting a drug test at CVS.   Their one for just pot is about 15 dollars but you can get one that tests for 12 things for 50.    You need to know what she's on, if anything, so a counselor can help her.  You need to get control of this whole situation now or it is only going to get worse.   Good luck, mamma.

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