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Having problems with my daughters teacher

My daughter has ADHD and she's in 5th grade and I asked the teacher if she can just make sure that my daughter writes down her homework so I can make sure she does it at home.she said no that was not her job.When I asked her if I could have a meeting with her and the principal she said absolutely not .he has no say so on how she runs her class.
by on Mar. 18, 2014 at 3:52 AM
Replies (21-30):
Bonita131
by Member on Mar. 19, 2014 at 2:49 AM

What is wrong with you that you cannot go to the principal directly and complain about the teachers attitude over your simple request? If it was me, I'd be in his or her face until I knew this kind of bullshit never happened again.

atlmom2
by Susie on Mar. 19, 2014 at 7:56 AM
But not to remind them to write it down and check. If the teacher tells the whole class she should not have to check all 30 if they wrote it down. By 5th grade it is the OP's kids issue. No teachers checked. They told kids of homework. It is their responsibility. OP doesn't want to blame her child. She wants to blame someone else. My kids didn't have teachers check if you wrote it down or not. Teachers do too much hand holding as it is. No, college professors don't hand hold either. Kids don't learn and teachers waste time doing it. No wonder kids are the way they are now, and helicopter mom's don't help.

Quoting tyfry7496: My sons high school teachers remind the kids and make sure they write down homework or snap a picture of it. I've had teachers send me a text message of big projects. This is without any formal interventions in place.

Sorry but it is the teachers job to remind kids of homework. It takes seconds to give a reminder at the end if class.

My college professors gave us reminders.
Quoting atlmom2: Actually OP's dd could write her own sticky note reminders. At that age seeing this should remind her. If not she is in a world of hurt in middle school and beyond.
Quoting HopesNDreams: No, I meant that no one wants to take the simple step of reminding her before going through the ton of paperwork. Most districts are willing to have their teachers do basic accommodations like reminders, notes on desks, email communications with parents, etc without the formalities of 504s or IEPs.
Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

Quoting HopesNDreams:� 

I find it strange that no one wants to take that simple step before going to the next level. Usually schools like to avoid it if they can.

It's because accommodations come with a ton of paperwork and most school psychologists are already overworked. Plus ADHD alone usually only qualifies for a 504 plan and that doesn't come with extra money for the school to pay for accommodations like an IEP does.

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tyfry7496
by Silver Member on Mar. 19, 2014 at 9:23 AM
College professors don't hand hold but they most certainly do give homework reminders. I've had them done verbally, by text and by email.

Just because someone is growing up or is an adult doesn't mean that reminders aren't done or needed.

I've been saved by those reminders in college. When taking 5 classes, doing an internship, working and raising a child things get forgotten and I was anal about writing EVERYTHING down.

What is being done or what this mom wants done is NOT helicopter parenting. It's a legitimate request that takes less than a minute to accomplish.

This teacher is not doing her job.

I guess I've dealt with more professional and nicer teachers. The few teachers that refuse to review homework are the most unorganized and unprofessional teachers in our district.


Quoting atlmom2: But not to remind them to write it down and check. If the teacher tells the whole class she should not have to check all 30 if they wrote it down. By 5th grade it is the OP's kids issue. No teachers checked. They told kids of homework. It is their responsibility. OP doesn't want to blame her child. She wants to blame someone else. My kids didn't have teachers check if you wrote it down or not. Teachers do too much hand holding as it is. No, college professors don't hand hold either. Kids don't learn and teachers waste time doing it. No wonder kids are the way they are now, and helicopter mom's don't help.

Quoting tyfry7496: My sons high school teachers remind the kids and make sure they write down homework or snap a picture of it. I've had teachers send me a text message of big projects. This is without any formal interventions in place. Sorry but it is the teachers job to remind kids of homework. It takes seconds to give a reminder at the end if class. My college professors gave us reminders.
Quoting atlmom2: Actually OP's dd could write her own sticky note reminders. At that age seeing this should remind her. If not she is in a world of hurt in middle school and beyond.
Quoting HopesNDreams: No, I meant that no one wants to take the simple step of reminding her before going through the ton of paperwork. Most districts are willing to have their teachers do basic accommodations like reminders, notes on desks, email communications with parents, etc without the formalities of 504s or IEPs.
Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

Quoting HopesNDreams:�  I find it strange that no one wants to take that simple step before going to the next level. Usually schools like to avoid it if they can.

It's because accommodations come with a ton of paperwork and most school psychologists are already overworked. Plus ADHD alone usually only qualifies for a 504 plan and that doesn't come with extra money for the school to pay for accommodations like an IEP does.

mjande4
by Member on Mar. 19, 2014 at 9:26 AM

I agree with all of this.  I have no doubt that the teacher is reminding the class, what he/she should not have to do is cater to one special snowflake because mama doesn't want hold the right person accountable.

Quoting atlmom2: But not to remind them to write it down and check. If the teacher tells the whole class she should not have to check all 30 if they wrote it down. By 5th grade it is the OP's kids issue. No teachers checked. They told kids of homework. It is their responsibility. OP doesn't want to blame her child. She wants to blame someone else. My kids didn't have teachers check if you wrote it down or not. Teachers do too much hand holding as it is. No, college professors don't hand hold either. Kids don't learn and teachers waste time doing it. No wonder kids are the way they are now, and helicopter mom's don't help.
Quoting tyfry7496: My sons high school teachers remind the kids and make sure they write down homework or snap a picture of it. I've had teachers send me a text message of big projects. This is without any formal interventions in place. Sorry but it is the teachers job to remind kids of homework. It takes seconds to give a reminder at the end if class. My college professors gave us reminders.
Quoting atlmom2: Actually OP's dd could write her own sticky note reminders. At that age seeing this should remind her. If not she is in a world of hurt in middle school and beyond.
Quoting HopesNDreams: No, I meant that no one wants to take the simple step of reminding her before going through the ton of paperwork. Most districts are willing to have their teachers do basic accommodations like reminders, notes on desks, email communications with parents, etc without the formalities of 504s or IEPs.
Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

Quoting HopesNDreams:�  I find it strange that no one wants to take that simple step before going to the next level. Usually schools like to avoid it if they can.

It's because accommodations come with a ton of paperwork and most school psychologists are already overworked. Plus ADHD alone usually only qualifies for a 504 plan and that doesn't come with extra money for the school to pay for accommodations like an IEP does.


atlmom2
by Susie on Mar. 19, 2014 at 9:27 AM

This teacher from what the OP says gives reminders but doesn't check each kid if they wrote it down.  In 5th grade they don't need hand holding.  This teacher is reminding.  That is their job and the teacher did it.  OP wants her kid specifically to be checked and looked after that she wrote it down and wrote it down right. 

Quoting tyfry7496: College professors don't hand hold but they most certainly do give homework reminders. I've had them done verbally, by text and by email. Just because someone is growing up or is an adult doesn't mean that reminders aren't done or needed. I've been saved by those reminders in college. When taking 5 classes, doing an internship, working and raising a child things get forgotten and I was anal about writing EVERYTHING down. What is being done or what this mom wants done is NOT helicopter parenting. It's a legitimate request that takes less than a minute to accomplish. This teacher is not doing her job. I guess I've dealt with more professional and nicer teachers. The few teachers that refuse to review homework are the most unorganized and unprofessional teachers in our district.
Quoting atlmom2: But not to remind them to write it down and check. If the teacher tells the whole class she should not have to check all 30 if they wrote it down. By 5th grade it is the OP's kids issue. No teachers checked. They told kids of homework. It is their responsibility. OP doesn't want to blame her child. She wants to blame someone else. My kids didn't have teachers check if you wrote it down or not. Teachers do too much hand holding as it is. No, college professors don't hand hold either. Kids don't learn and teachers waste time doing it. No wonder kids are the way they are now, and helicopter mom's don't help.
Quoting tyfry7496: My sons high school teachers remind the kids and make sure they write down homework or snap a picture of it. I've had teachers send me a text message of big projects. This is without any formal interventions in place. Sorry but it is the teachers job to remind kids of homework. It takes seconds to give a reminder at the end if class. My college professors gave us reminders.
Quoting atlmom2: Actually OP's dd could write her own sticky note reminders. At that age seeing this should remind her. If not she is in a world of hurt in middle school and beyond.
Quoting HopesNDreams: No, I meant that no one wants to take the simple step of reminding her before going through the ton of paperwork. Most districts are willing to have their teachers do basic accommodations like reminders, notes on desks, email communications with parents, etc without the formalities of 504s or IEPs.
Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

Quoting HopesNDreams:�  I find it strange that no one wants to take that simple step before going to the next level. Usually schools like to avoid it if they can.

It's because accommodations come with a ton of paperwork and most school psychologists are already overworked. Plus ADHD alone usually only qualifies for a 504 plan and that doesn't come with extra money for the school to pay for accommodations like an IEP does.


atlmom2
by Susie on Mar. 19, 2014 at 9:29 AM
Quoting mjande4:

I agree with all of this.  I have no doubt that the teacher is reminding the class, what he/she should not have to do is cater to one special snowflake because mama doesn't want hold the right person accountable.

Quoting atlmom2: But not to remind them to write it down and check. If the teacher tells the whole class she should not have to check all 30 if they wrote it down. By 5th grade it is the OP's kids issue. No teachers checked. They told kids of homework. It is their responsibility. OP doesn't want to blame her child. She wants to blame someone else. My kids didn't have teachers check if you wrote it down or not. Teachers do too much hand holding as it is. No, college professors don't hand hold either. Kids don't learn and teachers waste time doing it. No wonder kids are the way they are now, and helicopter mom's don't help.
Quoting tyfry7496: My sons high school teachers remind the kids and make sure they write down homework or snap a picture of it. I've had teachers send me a text message of big projects. This is without any formal interventions in place. Sorry but it is the teachers job to remind kids of homework. It takes seconds to give a reminder at the end if class. My college professors gave us reminders.
Quoting atlmom2: Actually OP's dd could write her own sticky note reminders. At that age seeing this should remind her. If not she is in a world of hurt in middle school and beyond.
Quoting HopesNDreams: No, I meant that no one wants to take the simple step of reminding her before going through the ton of paperwork. Most districts are willing to have their teachers do basic accommodations like reminders, notes on desks, email communications with parents, etc without the formalities of 504s or IEPs.
Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

Quoting HopesNDreams:�  I find it strange that no one wants to take that simple step before going to the next level. Usually schools like to avoid it if they can.

It's because accommodations come with a ton of paperwork and most school psychologists are already overworked. Plus ADHD alone usually only qualifies for a 504 plan and that doesn't come with extra money for the school to pay for accommodations like an IEP does.


Mine wrote it down because I made them accountable and punished them for homework not done.  That made them remember because of a consequense if they didn't do homework. 

mjande4
by Member on Mar. 19, 2014 at 9:38 AM
1 mom liked this

The OP is VERY similar to a situation that I have in one of my classes with one of my 200 students.  The difference is the kid is now a jUNIOR in HIGH SCHOOL.  At the end of each lesson, I tell the kids to pull out their calendars, write down the assignment, and get started.  I have 35-40 students in one class, but mom thinks that I should hover over her special son because he has ADD.  Uh no.  If he can't follow simple directions, then good luck holding down a job.  She has enabled him since he was in elementary and he feels no sense of obligation to take control of his education.  The future writing is on the wall with the OP's daughter as well.

Quoting atlmom2:
Quoting mjande4:

I agree with all of this.  I have no doubt that the teacher is reminding the class, what he/she should not have to do is cater to one special snowflake because mama doesn't want hold the right person accountable.

Quoting atlmom2: But not to remind them to write it down and check. If the teacher tells the whole class she should not have to check all 30 if they wrote it down. By 5th grade it is the OP's kids issue. No teachers checked. They told kids of homework. It is their responsibility. OP doesn't want to blame her child. She wants to blame someone else. My kids didn't have teachers check if you wrote it down or not. Teachers do too much hand holding as it is. No, college professors don't hand hold either. Kids don't learn and teachers waste time doing it. No wonder kids are the way they are now, and helicopter mom's don't help.
Quoting tyfry7496: My sons high school teachers remind the kids and make sure they write down homework or snap a picture of it. I've had teachers send me a text message of big projects. This is without any formal interventions in place. Sorry but it is the teachers job to remind kids of homework. It takes seconds to give a reminder at the end if class. My college professors gave us reminders.
Quoting atlmom2: Actually OP's dd could write her own sticky note reminders. At that age seeing this should remind her. If not she is in a world of hurt in middle school and beyond.
Quoting HopesNDreams: No, I meant that no one wants to take the simple step of reminding her before going through the ton of paperwork. Most districts are willing to have their teachers do basic accommodations like reminders, notes on desks, email communications with parents, etc without the formalities of 504s or IEPs.
Quoting Hannahluvsdogs:

Quoting HopesNDreams:�  I find it strange that no one wants to take that simple step before going to the next level. Usually schools like to avoid it if they can.

It's because accommodations come with a ton of paperwork and most school psychologists are already overworked. Plus ADHD alone usually only qualifies for a 504 plan and that doesn't come with extra money for the school to pay for accommodations like an IEP does.


Mine wrote it down because I made them accountable and punished them for homework not done.  That made them remember because of a consequense if they didn't do homework. 


gardensparrow
by on Mar. 19, 2014 at 10:27 AM

I'm sorry you're running into problems with your son's teacher. I know that's frustrating to feel like they're not on your side in helping your child get the best education possible. But I'm glad you've received so much good advice on IEPs, etc. Also, if you're not aware of it already, I wanted to mention that there's an organization called CHADD (Children and Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder) you may want to check out. They have a website that has a ton of information on there that might give you some guidance in handling this issue. Lastly, as others have mentioned, it may not hurt to go ahead and meet with the principal and share your concerns-or even talk with the school counselor. At least you'll feel like you're doing your part and maybe get some more insight on what sort of help you can expect for your son and where to go from here. So, just a couple thoughts to consider!

happynewyorker
by New Member on Mar. 19, 2014 at 2:23 PM

U should see about getting a friend buddy at school.  Ask the other children's parents if they can provide u with the homework assignment if need be. 

I'd report the teacher to the school board.

ladybugchick317
by on Mar. 19, 2014 at 2:27 PM

 Both my girls teachers make sure all the kids have their homework written in their agendas before they leave for the day everyday.

Quoting HopesNDreams: Depending on how severe her academic issues are, either a 504 plan or an IEP could address it. Once it is written in, it then becomes the teacher's job to make sure she writes it down. I find it strange that no one wants to take that simple step before going to the next level. Usually schools like to avoid it if they can.

 

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