What to do? Need advice...#1 school district for high school or #1 private school??
Okay--here is my story and I need some other motherly advice from anyone who has teens. We live in the Williamsville School District (rated #1). My daughter who is in 8th grade is beyond your average smart (like 99%average all 4 years so far of middle school). She just recently auditioned for All-County Orchestra and got 99/100 and made it even only after learning how to play the bass since this September. Next is the NYS auditions, tried out for all-star volleyball-made it, tried out for softball-made it. Going to tryout for next level in AGSL this Sunday. Performing at KIeinhans at Mary Seton Hall this Sunday also. I am not trying to toot her horn----just giving a little background. It seems whatever she tries or sets her mind to, it just seems to work out. Now granted, she does put in a lot of effort. She is one amazing kid.
So, automatically, she would be going to our local high school, who offers numerous AP classes and electives and either BOCES or HARKNESS if you want to learn more. It's a great school. My son (who is an average student) goes to our local high school. It's a 2 minute ride if they ever miss the bus, get sick, forget a book, have to be in early or stay after for a sport. No problem.
But, for some moment of me not really thinking ahead (lapse of judgement??), I one day say to my daughter--"hey, why don't you take the test for Nardin?" Not thinking of the actual cost at the time I said it, not thinking of the not close proximity (what if she misses the bus, forgets a book, gets sick, etc.). Her dad and I both work full-time. So, at first, dh was pissed that I even suggested the idea, because by no means are we wealthy--just your average hard-working people. So, she gets the book and works with my husband on testing strategies, etc. Winds out getting 750/800. Whereas the normal average score is 400-450. Auditioned for their orchestra-got in. So, now my husband is a little more on board. Now, he is willing to do anything to have her go. He thinks the name NARDIN will get her a full scholarship-his thinking--pay for high school and we wont have to for college. I told him this is not a guarantee at all.
So, I finally come to my senses a few days ago--what was I thinking>>I told him I do not want her to go to the private school. We pay over $4000/year in taxes and live in the #1 public school district in WNY. Why would we pay over $12k/yr to have to take the same AP classes that she can take at the Williamsville HS? Why would I spend and hour (1/2hr there, 1/2 hr back) in case I need to go to the school (ex-sports practice/games---at her softball meeting, she just got the calendar and EVERY DAY from now til the end of May, there is either after school practice or game--but no problem, because its 2 minutes from my house---but if this was at Nardin, I would be driving an hour after work every day. What about dinner, homework, my son, etc. Dinner would be until after 7. Then there is homework, showers, etc. And the bus for school next year picks her up at 6am, whereas the bus for Williamsville comes at 6:50, but the school is 2 minutes from my house and on my way to work, which dropoff could be 7:30.
What did I do? If I had never even mentioned this idea, my daughter would just be assuming she would be going to our high school down the street, just as her brother is and sister did. I feel terrible that I got her hopes up, but want to tell her that she is going to her school that we pay taxes for, 2 minutes away. Now my husband is opposing my thoughts on this, even though originally he was all against it. He still thinks the Nardin name alone is now her ticket to all that is good, and could not possibly compare to our #1 rated school .
I even called over 5 colleges yesterday and asked them very bluntly: "What does the name of the school have to do with someone getting in with a Nardin name or a Williamsville name in relations to getting into your school?" The answer from every single college was: " We dont look at the name, nor care that your kid went to a private school you paid for -vs- your local public high school." I asked what they do look for. Their answer--and I mean every college admissions office I called was: GPA, SAT, ACT, school involvement, community development, played sports, played instruments, etc. That is the stuff they look for and award scholarships for.
What would you do? What are your thoughts? This has been wrecking havoc--haven't slept in over a week, so stressed about this that if I think about it, I will just start crying, have had major stomach pains. I know in my heart of hearts, my daughter will do just fine at our local high school. But now I have opposition. My daughter is very mature and I think she will understand. I feel bad that she studied for the exam for so long and now I have no desire for her to attend the private school. UGH