Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

I Was Kicked Out Of The Examination Room!

Posted by on Jun. 6, 2014 at 4:22 PM
  • 82 Replies

 

Poll

Question:

Options:


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 0

This week Tereya had a doctor's appointment. Two years ago we crossed a new milestone. Every time I accompany my oldest daughter to her doctor's appointment I am reminded of the moment when her physician asked me to leave the examination room. I remember it like it was yesterday. After entering the examination room, the Registered Nurse (RN) asked Tereya and me how we were doing. We replied we are doing well.The nurse proceeded to take and record her vital signs (vs)--weight, height, and blood pressure. Shortly after, the Pediatrician entered the room. We engaged in a brief conversation before he provided a comparison of last year's vital signs and this year's vital signs. He stated, "She has maintained her blood pressure and weight which is wonderful". He stated, "It is very hard for many to do whether they are young or old".  He then he said, "Now it is time for you to wait in the waiting room".

I was shocked and in disbelief. My response was "Why do I have to wait in the waiting room? He went on to say that she is at the age where she may have some private issues that she would like to discuss with me, in private. I replied, "She is only 13 years old. I remember my mother being in the doctor's office with me until I was 17 years old. He said, "I know, but that was then and this is now. It's the law. You also know, that whatever we discuss I cannot discuss it with you unless she gives me permission to do so. As I sat in the waiting room, I wondered what they could possibly be discussing. I knew they would discuss topics such as education, sex, drugs, alcohol, school and extracurricular activities. However, I wanted to know specific questions. Before we left the office he informed me that once Nyasia turns 10, I will no longer be able to access her electronic medical records (emr) via their portal. I will have to go to the medical records department present my ID, prove parental status and then request the records. I quickly replied, "Are you kidding me"? Does she pay for her insurance? He laughed and said I did not want you to be surprised. So I decided to tell you today. I understand why they feel this is necessary, but it is such an inconvenience.

When Tereya and I left the doctor's office I asked her and her response was "stuff". She proceeded to say, "That's between me and the doctor". Eventually she told me that she gave the doctor permission to tell me what they discussed. I told her thank you, but I trust that if it was something serious, I hope you would feel comfortable enough to tell me yourself. I love my both my girls so much. I realize she is growing up and a part of me does not want her to grow up. However, she will be leaving for college in 2 years and she has to learn to do things for and by herself.

 Do you recall the first time your child's pediatrician asked you to leave the room? What was your reaction?

Luv_N_Me

by on Jun. 6, 2014 at 4:22 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
BGarcel
by Member on Jun. 6, 2014 at 4:47 PM
1 mom liked this

Mine are not yet old enough. But I remember when he asked my mom to do so. She threw one of the biggest fits I've ever seen out of her. I'm definitely not going to react the same way she did.

atlmom2
by Susie on Jun. 6, 2014 at 4:56 PM

Mine never asked me to leave.  Heck I went with my dd when she was 18 before college and they didn't care.  I think if the kid doesn't care, why doesn't it matter.  Heck my 23 yo had me go with her once when she has having some ear issues. 

Luv_N_Me
by New Member on Jun. 6, 2014 at 4:59 PM

I am a hands on parent and I want to know if soemthimg is wrong with my girls. When I stated that to their physician he said well if she does not tell you herself then you will never know because I can't tell you. If it's a life altering situation then I would have to tell you and I would encourage your daughter to tell you. Otherwise you will never know.

My mother stayed in the examination room with me until I was 17. I even recall her staying in the room with my younger sister until she was 17 years old and we are 11 years apart. I was shocked because she was so young. I thought I had a few years before I had to vacate the examination room.


Quoting BGarcel:

Mine are not yet old enough. But I remember when he asked my mom to do so. She threw one of the biggest fits I've ever seen out of her. I'm definitely not going to react the same way she did.


trosemomof3
by on Jun. 6, 2014 at 5:00 PM
Me oldest is 13 and I've never been asked to leave
Luv_N_Me
by New Member on Jun. 6, 2014 at 5:02 PM

I agree. If the child doesn't care it should not matter. I am 36 years old and this year I had my mother accmpany me to the doctor's office. lol

Quoting atlmom2:

Mine never asked me to leave.  Heck I went with my dd when she was 18 before college and they didn't care.  I think if the kid doesn't care, why doesn't it matter.  Heck my 23 yo had me go with her once when she has having some ear issues. 


BGarcel
by Member on Jun. 6, 2014 at 5:03 PM
2 moms liked this

I think laws on this differ from state to state.

But if the child does care, then you have to leave or the physician is obligated to not render service.

EyEmTuRtLe
by Bronze Member on Jun. 6, 2014 at 5:08 PM

It sucks and you're not alone. Novemeber 1st, 2012 when we changed insurance companies I was told point blame I have no say. 

My DS is now 16 and has to give me permission to even call the doctor to get him in. If we show up and my DS says that he didn't want to be there I get spoken too. I have next to no say over what vaxs he gets. I have zero access to his medical records and all other documents without his permission.

Damn HIPPA law really screws over the parents of minors. I don't expect to be allowed to be in ALL of my DS's appts but I sure as hell want to have a say in shots and whether he needs to have certain exams done like eye exams or a chiro appt. But nooooooo I have no say. An it pisses me off.

cybcm
by Bronze Member on Jun. 6, 2014 at 5:14 PM
3 moms liked this
The age of medical consent is 14 here.

I don't WANT to be in the room. I want my kids to have the best medical care possible, and if my presence hinders their confidence to speak about any issue then why would I want to be in there?
Luv_N_Me
by New Member on Jun. 6, 2014 at 5:21 PM

When she told me she gave the doctor permission, I declined the the gesture. I agree with you. I also want her and her sister to have the best care. I want her to know she can talk to her doctor if at anytime she felt like she could not talk to me. 

Quoting cybcm: The age of medical consent is 14 here. I don't WANT to be in the room. I want my kids to have the best medical care possible, and if my presence hinders their confidence to speak about any issue then why would I want to be in there?


Luv_N_Me
by New Member on Jun. 6, 2014 at 5:33 PM

I reside in NYC. I can still make her appointments. However, I ma limited in what I can do. For example, my youngest daughter Nyasia seems to have several allergies. Every year we find out she is allergic to something. As a result of these allergies, her skin has suffered tremendously. Now we need to see a dermatologists. So normally, I would log into the patient portal to print a copy of specific documents from the medical record such as the progress notes stating newly diagnosed and confirmed allergies, lab results and current medication list in 5 minutes. I need these documents prior to her visit. Once my daughter turns 10, I will no longer be able to do this. I would have to submit a written request for the records and sometmes it takes 5-7 business days to process the request. This is such an inconvenience.

I work in a Managed Care Organization and its very difficult to obtain patient medical records.

Quoting EyEmTuRtLe:

It sucks and you're not alone. Novemeber 1st, 2012 when we changed insurance companies I was told point blame I have no say. 

My DS is now 16 and has to give me permission to even call the doctor to get him in. If we show up and my DS says that he didn't want to be there I get spoken too. I have next to no say over what vaxs he gets. I have zero access to his medical records and all other documents without his permission.

Damn HIPPA law really screws over the parents of minors. I don't expect to be allowed to be in ALL of my DS's appts but I sure as hell want to have a say in shots and whether he needs to have certain exams done like eye exams or a chiro appt. But nooooooo I have no say. An it pisses me off.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN