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need advice, long

Posted by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:04 PM
  • 3 Replies
Kind of a long story but I am running out of options for advice. I have three boys ages 18. 16, and almost 13. I had also been raising my nephew who is 3 1/2. He had been living with me since the day he came home from the hospital. His mom was a druggie, prostitute, who didn't see her own children for months at a time. She got into rehab and cleaned up for a few months and decided she wanted her kids back. He had been mine for almost 3 years. This was his home, we were his family. When he talked about his brothers it was my boys, I was who he thought of when he called for mommy (she was the one that started him calling me mommy), when he said he wants to go home he wanted my house, I had his first steps, his first words on tape, photos of him feeding himself for the first time, and our family photo with him in it on my mantle. I sat up when he was sick, his doctor knew me. All of his memories were with us. In all rights he was my baby. Of course I said HELL NO. My child won't be there until I know this is going to last. A week later she asked for an over night. I allowed it under the supervision of her sister. The next morning I have a police officer and CPS at my door. She had accused my son of sexual abuse. I was floored. I shut the door and told them to come back when they had an arrest warrant or a search warrant. I called a lawyer and set up an appointment. Then came the hard part. I had to sit down and think. I asked myself the hard questions and thought about it as if it wasn't my family. Then I talked to my son and did the same thing. Finally I did the unthinkable I called CPS and asked them to come back and finish the investigation. After they left I packed my family into the van and went to the police station. I told them we wanted the full work up on all of us. Interview, blood and hair samples, and lie detector was scheduled for the following day. Long story short everyone in my home was cleared 100%. I thought great it is over. But the court let her keep my nephew and I no longer had any rights. I was heart broken but there was nothing I could do but wait for her to fall while hoping she would finally be a good mom for her children. Then the worst happened. Yep it gets worse. She watched a girl that goes to school with my 16 year old. She passed it around school and suddenly everyone was accusing him. He was harassed constantly. He finally refused to go to school. He was held back once so this puts him 2 years behind! He refuses to even talk about going back next year or to another local school, our alternative school is a joke (police arr there daily) and online school is expensive (I just can't afford it). I don't want him to drop out and ruin his while life but what other options do I have? He lost family, friends, a child he thinks of as his baby brother, and he was accused of the worst thing you can do. He is withdrawn and wants nothing to do with a social life outside our home. He has major trust issues now. How do I help him move on and get him an education!
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:04 PM
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Replies (1-3):
mother3boys1gir
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 3:04 PM

omg this is horrible, Im so sorry this happened to your family. did you try some counselling? that might help a little bit.

san33
by Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 3:57 PM
We did try counseling but he refused to keep going. I'm working on getting a new doctor and getting it started again. I just don't want his whole life to stop because of something like this.
gdiamante
by Silver Member on Jun. 30, 2014 at 12:56 AM

Lawyer up. You have a slander suit on your hands. 

Lawyering up should have been done the minute the nephew was in your care, to get permanent custody of him.

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