• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Crying over loosing

Posted by on Aug. 6, 2016 at 1:50 PM
  • 13 Replies
My annoyance for the week. Tori's summer camp has a competition against another camp. Its suppose to be 15 of the best players from both camps. The game this time was basketball. About 3 quartets thru the game toris team was winning by a good amount. The "star*player from the other team caught some kind if attitude. Tori wasn't clear how. His coach pulled him from the game. That resulted in tears from several players from His team and they decided they were gonna just sit. So toris head coach decides to scrap the game turn it into a free throw comp stating from scratch and the win went to the other team along with the trophy.

This annoyed me greatly. I don't care who won or loss but giving in to tears what exactly is the message he is sending.
by on Aug. 6, 2016 at 1:50 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
atlmom2
by Susie on Aug. 6, 2016 at 5:07 PM

OMG, this is why this generation is so whimpy.  They can't deal with any disappointment or reality.  It is so sad.  The everyone wins a trophy or if they can't we will change the rules so they can.  Totally ridiculous.  I never lessened any blow for mine and I tell ya, they can hang with the best of them, and don't need any medications either.  

iwashere
by Gold Member on Aug. 6, 2016 at 6:44 PM
Good Lord. Did they all get participation medals after the free throws. ?
Linagma03
by Bronze Member on Aug. 7, 2016 at 12:17 AM

That is just ridiculous. 

awelling
by on Aug. 7, 2016 at 12:20 AM
This all starts when you let your kid win at candyland everytime.
jaygidmommy
by on Aug. 7, 2016 at 12:21 AM
*losing
TexanMomOf6
by on Aug. 7, 2016 at 12:25 AM
Nope. Bad precedence. What's with all these adults that give in to the whiney kids?

I wonder if the referees at college and pro games will acquiesce to players pouting and whining and let them all play pattycake instead?
romalove
by Bronze Member on Aug. 7, 2016 at 10:44 AM

My daughter was an all star cheerleader starting when she was 7 until she was 13.  The first year they were on an exhibition team, meaning they went to competitions but they were just exhibiting, which was to get them used to the cadence of competition and to get them to show their skills in front of a crowd without the pressure of worrying about winning. 

So the girls did about three of these competitions, and they would get medals at the competitions.  There was always an announcer and they would introduce each level, including the exhibition levels, and give out the awards, with the exhibition teams each getting named and given medals without standing.  Then the teams that were competing would be given their awards, with standing.

We're in the car coming home from one of these competitions and my daughter says, I don't want this medal, I want a place.  We were like....what place, what does that mean?  She says you know, first place, second place, third place, I want a place, not a medal.

At 7 she understood that the medal was meaningless because it was awarded regardless of how you actually did.  She preferred to get third place and have the award have meaning than an award with no meaning at all.

I think she's not alone, and most kids don't want meaningless medals and meaningless wins.  I think it's a mistake to coddle behavior as you've described OP.

Msgme
by Gold Member on Aug. 7, 2016 at 10:56 AM
Thankfully her directors only give medals to kids who deserve them. The comps with the other camp the team gets the trophy. But within the camp it self during tournaments medals gold , silver and bronze are given. Last year she got the gold for running. This year so far she has the gold for football. She caught some hail Mary (lol) and her team won because of it. She was also told by the director she was the best boy in camp. Which is a whole other post lol.

Quoting romalove:

My daughter was an all star cheerleader starting when she was 7 until she was 13.  The first year they were on an exhibition team, meaning they went to competitions but they were just exhibiting, which was to get them used to the cadence of competition and to get them to show their skills in front of a crowd without the pressure of worrying about winning. 

So the girls did about three of these competitions, and they would get medals at the competitions.  There was always an announcer and they would introduce each level, including the exhibition levels, and give out the awards, with the exhibition teams each getting named and given medals without standing.  Then the teams that were competing would be given their awards, with standing.

We're in the car coming home from one of these competitions and my daughter says, I don't want this medal, I want a place.  We were like....what place, what does that mean?  She says you know, first place, second place, third place, I want a place, not a medal.

At 7 she understood that the medal was meaningless because it was awarded regardless of how you actually did.  She preferred to get third place and have the award have meaning than an award with no meaning at all.

I think she's not alone, and most kids don't want meaningless medals and meaningless wins.  I think it's a mistake to coddle behavior as you've described OP.

romalove
by Bronze Member on Aug. 7, 2016 at 10:57 AM

Oh, that's funny.  LOL

Quoting Msgme: Thankfully her directors only give medals to kids who deserve them. The comps with the other camp the team gets the trophy. But within the camp it self during tournaments medals gold , silver and bronze are given. Last year she got the gold for running. This year so far she has the gold for football. She caught some hail Mary (lol) and her team won because of it. She was also told by the director she was the best boy in camp. Which is a whole other post lol.
Quoting romalove:

My daughter was an all star cheerleader starting when she was 7 until she was 13.  The first year they were on an exhibition team, meaning they went to competitions but they were just exhibiting, which was to get them used to the cadence of competition and to get them to show their skills in front of a crowd without the pressure of worrying about winning. 

So the girls did about three of these competitions, and they would get medals at the competitions.  There was always an announcer and they would introduce each level, including the exhibition levels, and give out the awards, with the exhibition teams each getting named and given medals without standing.  Then the teams that were competing would be given their awards, with standing.

We're in the car coming home from one of these competitions and my daughter says, I don't want this medal, I want a place.  We were like....what place, what does that mean?  She says you know, first place, second place, third place, I want a place, not a medal.

At 7 she understood that the medal was meaningless because it was awarded regardless of how you actually did.  She preferred to get third place and have the award have meaning than an award with no meaning at all.

I think she's not alone, and most kids don't want meaningless medals and meaningless wins.  I think it's a mistake to coddle behavior as you've described OP.


Msgme
by Gold Member on Aug. 7, 2016 at 11:04 AM
I was talking about this with madalyn who is a counselor for the pee wees. I was telling her I can sorta see why 4 year olds could need that recognition. Her response was not her kids. She said sometimes she let's them win and sometimes they lose. She won't put up with sore losing or sore winning. She gives out stickers to kids who do nice things. Every kid can get one they just have to do something nice and tell her what that is. She had one kid who said his nice thing was not being mean. He walked away with no sticker cause not being mean is what is expected. So far no complaints from parents.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)