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Figured it Out

Posted by on Feb. 15, 2017 at 7:10 PM
  • 20 Replies

I figured out why I don't like dd bf. He is a one upper which I hate. Whatever anyone says he can do one better. You had chicken pox? Well, he had them twice. He is also "the best", "famous for", etc for every little thing he does. He also does not like kids which he does nothing to hide. I have a ds9 and a dd 7 so for me that presents an issue. I have had to correct him twice today for the way he spoke to them. DD and I will be having a conversation later, after he goes home. 

by on Feb. 15, 2017 at 7:10 PM
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Replies (1-10):
3Junebabies
by Nina on Feb. 15, 2017 at 7:44 PM
How old is he?
iwashere
by Gold Member on Feb. 15, 2017 at 7:55 PM
2 moms liked this

He's a teen, right? He is probably insecure. One uppers are usually trying to convince themselves of how great they are, not others, despite how it sounds. You can counter his statements gently to reassure him that he's fine the way he is. A little confidence may go a long way with him,

.

RaeMarie
by Silver Member on Feb. 15, 2017 at 8:40 PM

16. 

Quoting 3Junebabies: How old is he?


RaeMarie
by Silver Member on Feb. 15, 2017 at 8:41 PM

Teen or not, confidence or not, I will not allow him to treat my younger kids badly in any way. He says enough about kids to dd and she will dump him anyway. While she claims to never want kids she has a real heart for kids and especially those with special needs. 

Quoting iwashere:

He's a teen, right? He is probably insecure. One uppers are usually trying to convince themselves of how great they are, not others, despite how it sounds. You can counter his statements gently to reassure him that he's fine the way he is. A little confidence may go a long way with him,

.


Ziva65
by Silver Member on Feb. 15, 2017 at 9:28 PM

My oldest son had a friend like that in high school. I knew the kid had family problems and there was a reason for his behavior, but that attitude drove me nuts. For a while I thought maybe I can help him, and tried to guide hm, that didn't work. And he had no manners, I'd hoped my kids would rub off on him, nope. He had no regard for the mom (as she ran off with a boyfriend) and no regard for the dad (who worked long hours out of town), so he ended up living with grandparents. There was most certainly insecurity there, I think his behavior was his way of feeling important.

Needless to say, they're now college sophomores- don't even talk with each other. (Ok with me)

Sad, but you reap what you sow. If that kid doesn't change, he will be losing friends.

f.i.s.h
by Member on Feb. 15, 2017 at 9:31 PM

Is she also 16? I think it'd be worth having a conversation, I wouldn't want anyone talking to my younger kids like that either. Just be prepared that she may be defensive and may not take to heart what you say but at least it'll be in the back of her mind.

RaeMarie
by Silver Member on Feb. 15, 2017 at 10:55 PM

DD is also 16. Thankfully I would be extremely surprised if she became defensive. We just don't have that kind of relationship. She can hate on her siblings all she wants but oh the poor soul that tries it too. She is struggling with the fact that I do not like the boy. It bothers her. Eventually it will overcome her and she will ditch the boy. 

Quoting f.i.s.h:

Is she also 16? I think it'd be worth having a conversation, I wouldn't want anyone talking to my younger kids like that either. Just be prepared that she may be defensive and may not take to heart what you say but at least it'll be in the back of her mind.


RaeMarie
by Silver Member on Feb. 15, 2017 at 10:58 PM
1 mom liked this

Met mom tonight. Don't like her at all. Not one bit. She is very protective of her kids, which is great, but she is a bit too street for me. Talked a big game about how strict she is with her kids and how severe the punishments are. Seems the poor boy plays the role of a parent more than the mom does. She works like 80 hours a week and the stepdad works 60-80. She makes her son responsible for cooking, cleaning, watching siblings (15 mo, 7 and 9), homework, bathtimes, diapers etc. Now I feel bad for the kid. Still don't like him but feel bad for him. That is too much to demand of a 16 yr old. He didn't choose to have 5 kids (oldest sibling is mid 20's and lives in another state) so he shouldn't have to give up his entire childhood to raise 3!

atlmom2
by Susie on Feb. 15, 2017 at 11:06 PM
Oh I can't stand one uppers. A poster here drives us all crazy here who does that too. Rude teens drive me crazy.
3Junebabies
by Nina on Feb. 16, 2017 at 12:02 AM
I think it's just because he's a kid. It's annoying but, he's a kid.

Quoting RaeMarie:

16. 

Quoting 3Junebabies: How old is he?

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