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Moms with Teens Moms with Teens

disrespect

Posted by on Apr. 28, 2009 at 12:22 AM
  • 14 Replies

What do you do when your child is disrespectful, such as talking back, not doing what you ask them to do.  May even scream at you.

Thanks for your opinions.

In His service,

Brenda

by on Apr. 28, 2009 at 12:22 AM
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Replies (1-10):
nymommyof5
by on Apr. 28, 2009 at 1:49 AM
2 moms liked this

Hang in there Brenda...living with and raising a teen is some of the most difficult times of motherhood.  First thing I would say is take a breather and don't get mixed up in a shouting match with your teen. It only makes things worse (been there done that). Second when you have had time to think about what you want to accomplish with your teen set some rules with some real consequences that relate to the situation if the rules arent followed. Third let them know that you respect the fact that they are growing but they must realize that you are still the parent and have the final say. Make it known that you will not tolerate them screaming at you or being disrespectful and that if they want to be treated as an adult then they should act like one.

 

SherriX2
by on Apr. 28, 2009 at 2:29 AM
1 mom liked this

Its very hard for me to answer you because I am still trying to figure this out. My DS & I both have jump in your face, flare up ,bad tempers. My mom keeps telling me its because we are both Tauras's. My dad is also a  Taraus & we faught like crazy when I was a teenager.

I hope a lot of mom's post because I still need to learn.

One thing that needs to stop here is that my ds has started cussing at me, he will tell me you you're pissing me of  and words worst then that.

(I have learned how to control my temper, but that really didnt happen until my early 30's)

 

Click on the groups avatar to go my group


shanlaree
by on Apr. 28, 2009 at 7:19 AM

It depends on how nasty she is being, she has never really yelled at us, she knows that is not acceptable. But she does get a little mouthy here and there. Usually my husband and I will remind her that she is being disrespectful and then take away one or more of her "treasures", her phone, computer, Ipod, TV, car keys... whatever we feel is necessary at the time. We never use empty threats, that only tells her there is no consequences for her actions. She is our first child so we are new to all of this, and we have 2 more girls to go. lol Good luck!

SophiaofLight
by on Apr. 28, 2009 at 10:36 PM

I've just always had this "look" with kids, other kids, my kids. They know if they see it they are in soooooo much trouble. With my teenagers, I just walk in and take out their books (they love to read) and take out the stereo, video games and let them sit in their room and stare at the walls for a while. I've found it pretty effective, they don't like it much.  When they come out they are very sweet.

When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty.

-Thomas Jefferson
tracylynnr67
by on Apr. 29, 2009 at 12:27 AM
2 moms liked this

 

They get one warning and then they start losing privleges starting with their computer time and if they continue, they lose more. About a month ago my 18yo (who is in the 11th grade) wouldn't stop with the attitude at lunch time (he and my 17yo come home for lunch) and when I told him to stop he said "what are you going to do about it?". When he got home from school and found out that the computers had been password protected, that he was not allowed on the XBox or Wii and when he discovered that hiss TV, MP3 player, DVD player and CD player were all missing from his room and that he wasn't allowed to drive anywhere but to work and back he saw what I could do. He hasn't had any more attitude issues since then because he knows that being 18 doesn't exempt him from being grounded.

countrygirl1234
by on May. 17, 2013 at 7:54 PM
1 mom liked this

 i am dealing with the same thing with my 15 year old daughter. She doesn't do what she is told and she uses profound language with yelling and throwing things. I have tried everything, taking things away, grounding her from going out with friends and she still is acting out. I am new at this teenage stage. I know for sure that you have to stick with the punishments and keep enforcing it or they won't believe you and their behavior won't change.

boys2men2soon
by Kimberly on May. 17, 2013 at 9:26 PM
1 mom liked this

Disrespect is not tolerated.   I will not respond to it, I never have and never will.  If I don't like the tone they use, I ignore them altogether...as if I never heard a word. 

Honestly, neither of my sons have ever screamed at me.    If they dared, I would probably very quietly tell them when they can speak like rational humans, I will gladly converse.      My DH on the other hand, would not take it so well... which is likely the reason our sons wouldn't dare. :)




HopesNDreams
by Member on May. 17, 2013 at 9:37 PM
1 mom liked this
I tell them to stop and offer a chance to rephrase or change their tone. Nothing about their 'issue' is discussed until they are speaking appropriately.
luckysevenwow
by Platinum Member on May. 17, 2013 at 9:46 PM
It depends on the situation, it's a hard one to answer.
lucky2Beeme
by Gold Member on May. 17, 2013 at 11:00 PM
1 mom liked this

Mine were sent to their bedroom. They were advised that when they calmed down and could talk respectfully they could come back out.As long as they could control their attitude I would be willing to discuss whatever brought on the disrespectful tone.

We ask our children to do things. They know they will be asked once then told. We prefer to ask and them to do. If they didn't do what was asked then told they lost privileges.

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