my hubby and I are going through our first deployment. We've only been married 8 months and have a 2 month old son. I'm tired all the time and miss my husband.. but understand why he's gone. Does anyone have any advice for a new military wife and new mommy?
trust me i know what ur going threw!! We have been married almost a year ourselves but r going threw our 1st deployment together plus we have a 5 month old.. i was in the Army also at one time and thats how we met but i understand the life style alot! Remember its ok to for u to have weak moments we all do!!! its ok to just take a shower and just cry when u need too! Also dont be scared or affraid to ask for help from people!! I also recommend go and make some friends with other miltary wives on ur post!! It helps sooooo much to be able to talk to someone and them understand what ur going threw!! Deployments are hard on everyone!! Just stay open with ur hubby! Dont lie to him when ur sad but at the same time dont just soak n pitty when talking to him... Hmmm well Im always around so if u need a friend or have a question please feel free to ask me! I dont know everything there is to know bout the miltary and no ones perfect but ill do my best to help u and answer questions for u! Oh yea Im Amy lol!
hi my name is Amber and I know how hard things are. My husband is on his second deployment. With a new baby things must be really hard. For me I suffer from situational depression when my husband is deployed. I reached out to my church and some counseling to get through things. It is help full to me. I have found that the most important thing is having others around that support you. Family and friends are key in getting on with life. Get out of the house everyday and do something. Sometimes when I am really down after just taking the dog for a walk I feel better. Hang in there and your family will be together again soon. Amber
yeah I try to get out on a walk or two with my son everyday, if the weather permits.. the only other time I really get out is to go grocery shopping... there isn't anything to do around here really. I've made friends with a couple of wives, but most of the people I've met around here have been pretty snotty. My parents and my husbands parents both live in germany, which is where my husband and I met. He's taking his R&R there and we're going to Paris for our one year anniversary :) Being away from him is hard, but I try to keep a positive attitude as much as I can. Every day he's gone is another day closer to when I get to see him again! The biggest thing I'm worried about is my husband coming home and our son not knowing him or not liking him.
It may take a little time for your son to take to him. It is hardest on your solder. Having a son who does not respond to him. My experience is that they do take to them quickly when they are that young. Babies can sense the connection and love. It is always hard making friends. I have lived in Clinton, Iowa for seventeen years and I still have a hard time. People change and my husbands unit is not close to me. I do not have many military wives to talk to. Most of my friends do not get it. My family is no help, they are more work than I can handle at times. My three children are why I try to stay active. They need me more now than ever. I do what I can to keep active with them and that in-turn helps me. You should check and see if there any any groups you can join. What are your interests? I try to work out at the gym, take dance classes, and I joined a BTS group. It is good to chat, hope to talk to you soon. Amber
my name is ashley, and hon, i can probably relate more to you than anyone. this is was my first deployment as well.
my husband and i were only married exactly 3 months when he deployed. and i was 5 1/2 months pregnant.
he came home for R&R a week after our daughter was born.
you think having to say good-bye the first was hard, the second time is even worse.
you get used to him being home, and then he has to leave again.
living with family is hard enough as it is, and i imaging living alone is worse.
the way i have been getting through it, is here on CafeMom
our deployment is almost over thankfully.
As a once military Brat and now a military wife I've been through quite a few deployments. The best advice I can give for a new mom and new Military wife is to stay busy. Seriously anything to keep your schedule full is GREAT! Not so full you wear yourself out but busy enough to help the hours go by. Hours turn into days, and days into weeks etc so if you set yourself a routine or schedule and keep busy your time will go by faster. MUCH faster!
Get yourself out there and get involved with your Unit FRG or something. They all know what you are going through and they have tons of helpful advice and suggestions. Plus they always need help with something. Its like cafemom in real life so to speak. You have someone to turn to everytime you turn around if you need it. They have lots of things going on that not only can you help out with organizing but to take your child(ren) to and be able to spend time together.
If you need anymore help.suggestions or have more questions feel free to PM me. Like the other girl said I dont know everything but I might be able to help get you started in some direction...
Have a good night. And Good luck
Frances
Need Advice Please PIOG
- samgirl03
on May. 19, 2009 at 4:37 PM