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sticky Welcome to Holland!

AuntGranny

Apr. 14, 2008 at 9:03 PM by AuntGranny
posted to Raising Children with Down Syndrome

  • 13 Replies
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Thought I would repost this since we have so many new members that may not have seen it before.
 

WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by Emily Perl Kingsley

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability- to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this...

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip -to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

" Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills... and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy...and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ...about Holland.

Reprinted with permission from Emily Perl Kinglsey. 1987 copyright by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved
Written by AuntGranny on Apr. 14, 2008 at 9:03 PM Send AuntGranny a message

Replies:


Mom2AidenW

by Mom2AidenW on Apr. 14, 2008 at 9:25 PM

And the Down syndrome Creed

 

My face may be different but my feelings are the same.

I laugh and I cry and take pride in my gains.

I was sent here among you to teach you to love, as God in the heavens looks down from above.

To Him, I'm no different His love knows no bounds;

It's those here among you in the cities and towns, that judge me by standards that man has imparted, but this family I've chosen, will help me get started.

For I'm one of the children so special and few, that came here to learn the same lessons as you.

That love is acceptance, it must come from the heart; we all have the same purpose, though not the same start.

The Lord gave me life to live and embrace, and I'll do it as you do, but at my own pace.

author unknown

                                                     

                                                                

Group Admin. of Raising Children with Down Syndrome

                                                   p13295s1100726_14-1.jpg picture by slbowli
dellwithtwins

by dellwithtwins on Apr. 14, 2008 at 9:28 PM

I WAS GIVEN THE FIRST ONE WHILE IN THE HOSPITAL AND IT MADE A WORLD OF DIFFENCE FOR ME THANKS ,BUT NEVER SAW THE SECOND ONE TILL NOW I LIKE IT. THANKS , I LOVE THEM BOTH GREAT JOB
lundaylove

by lundaylove on Apr. 14, 2008 at 9:53 PM

ive never seen either but i adore them now. how true they are.

   

Steph. Mom of Preemie Twins. Hoping this baby will go 9 months
Mom2AidenW

by Mom2AidenW on Apr. 14, 2008 at 10:03 PM


Quoting dellwithtwins:

I WAS GIVEN THE FIRST ONE WHILE IN THE HOSPITAL AND IT MADE A WORLD OF DIFFENCE FOR ME THANKS ,BUT NEVER SAW THE SECOND ONE TILL NOW I LIKE IT. THANKS , I LOVE THEM BOTH GREAT JOB


I have probably 25 poems about Down syndrome. I will be glad to share them sometime.

                                                     

                                                                

Group Admin. of Raising Children with Down Syndrome

                                                   p13295s1100726_14-1.jpg picture by slbowli
Andj

by Andj on Apr. 15, 2008 at 10:17 AM

Love that one!!!!!  Here is another one of my favorites enjoy :).

God Chooses a Mom for a Disabled Child

by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a  few by social pressures, and a couple by habit. This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen ? Somehow, I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth; son; patron saint, Matthew."

"Forrester, Marjorie; daughter; patron saint, Cecelia."

"Rudledge, Carrie; twins; patron saint... give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."

The angel is curious. "Why this one, God ? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God.

"Could I give a handicapped child a mother who does not know laughter ? That would be cruel."

"But has she patience ?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it. I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independance. She'll have to teach the child to live in her world and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps, "Selfishness ?  Is that a virtue ?"

God nods. "If she can't seperate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, there is a woman I will bless with a child less then perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word.' She will never consider a 'step' ordinary. When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle and know it ! When she describes a tree or a sunset to her blind child, she will see it as few people ever see my creations.

"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see --- ignorance, cruelty, prejudice --- and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."

"And what about her patron saint ?" asks the angel, his pen poised in midair.

God smiles. " A mirror will suffice."

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Mom with the biggest heart
SanDiegoMaxMom

by SanDiegoMaxMom on Apr. 16, 2008 at 11:41 AM

I love Emily Pearl Kingsley!

She was one of the founders and early writers on.....SESAME STREET

She also co-wrote a book with her son, Jason and his friend called...COUNT US IN
kylesmile1

by kylesmile1 on Apr. 19, 2008 at 9:23 PM

What great information!  Sesame Street was so special to me as a child.  As a mom, the first Sesame Street I watched after bringing my Katy home (I was watching with my then 15 month old, Katy's older sister) and they had a Down Syndrome child during Elmo's world.  I know that they have them on quite often, but this was such good timing for a mom who was a little lost.
 
SanDiegoMaxMom

by SanDiegoMaxMom on Apr. 19, 2008 at 10:53 PM

kylesmile1 on Apr. 19, 2008 at 6:23 PM

I'm glad you liked the info.  So many are touched by the poem and don't realize the amazing woman behind it!
CHERRY_POP916

by CHERRY_POP916 on May. 12, 2008 at 10:26 PM

I never really liked this story! Nor have i ever felt it was at all the same as what my child having DS!
CHERRY_POP916

by CHERRY_POP916 on May. 12, 2008 at 10:31 PM

Oh i love this one! im going to put it on myspace! i have a poem someone sent me i love so much! Here it is!

A meeting was held quite far from Earth!

 It's time again for another birth.

 Said the Angels to the LORD above,

 This Special Child will need much love.

   Her progress may be very slow,

 Accomplishments she may not show.

And she'll require extra care

From the folks she meets down there. 
she may not run or laugh or play,

Her thoughts may seem quite far away,

In many ways she won't adapt,

And she'll be known as handicapped.

So let's be careful where she's sent,

We want her life to be content.

Please LORD,

find the parents who Will do

a very special job for you. 

They will not realize right away

The leading role they're asked to play,

But with this child sent from above

Comes stronger faith and richer love.

And soon they'll know the privilege given

In caring for their gift from Heaven.

Their precious charge, so meek and mild,

 Is HEAVEN'S VERY SPECIAL CHILD.


Quoting Mom2AidenW:

And the Down syndrome Creed

 

My face may be different but my feelings are the same.

I laugh and I cry and take pride in my gains.

I was sent here among you to teach you to love, as God in the heavens looks down from above.

To Him, I'm no different His love knows no bounds;

It's those here among you in the cities and towns, that judge me by standards that man has imparted, but this family I've chosen, will help me get started.

For I'm one of the children so special and few, that came here to learn the same lessons as you.

That love is acceptance, it must come from the heart; we all have the same purpose, though not the same start.

The Lord gave me life to live and embrace, and I'll do it as you do, but at my own pace.

author unknown

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