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IFSP (early intervention review time)

Posted by on Nov. 9, 2010 at 6:43 PM
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So its that time of year again the IFSP review, Hate them. I always feel bad at the end of the review and want to cry.  I think its because they focus so much on numbers.  What Ethan can and can't do, what percentage he is behind and where we go from here.  They all say how wonderful he is doing and at the same time I hear he is (percentage) behind.  I have learned to hate percentages.  I'm sick of early intervention.  I do have to say it has helped Ethan a lot.  He is 19 mo old walking almost running, ok fine motor but verbal he is not.  He knows alot of signs but that doesn't count.  And oh also doesn't count that he know shoes go on his feet they want him to point to his feet when asked and other body parts.  We focus on so many other things but not the ones they test him on. I just don't get it.  He is doing so good but when he isn't where they would like him to be or test him on something they know he can't do, it frustrates me.

I also have decided though it is nice the therapist come to our house is it too much to ask that they be on time some of the time.  We have a life to, though it seems at times like we don't, between doctors and pt, ot, speech and special ed its crazy.  I also hope that tommorrow doesn't bring news of increased therapy. 

Oh and then the special ed teacher mentioned going to school next Jan 2012 and mom flipped. I'm not ready for him to go to school next year.  The little guy gives and gives and they want more.  It just seems like 2 is too early for school.

Aimee

by on Nov. 9, 2010 at 6:43 PM
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glitterwings
by Member on Nov. 9, 2010 at 6:55 PM

I know how you feel when they tell you everything they're are behind in. It's upsetting to say the least.

VeronicaTex
by on Nov. 10, 2010 at 6:22 AM

I went through that,  too,  when my 17-year-old had someone evaluate her....like at the very beginning, at ARDs I attended at school....even listening to her doctor at a recent checkup...:( .  (I also used to be a bilingual teacher and comparing was inevitable.)   

But these are two very different viewpoints...

I am now homeschooling my sweetpea....I see the progress...I no longer have someone giving me percentages...reminding me from a clinical point of view where she stands in comparison to the rest of the world, even the Down Syndrome world.....

This is what my daughter can do:  She can, with me encouraging her, do many things for herself in the kitchen....helping herself.....freeing me up to take care of myself.....She can, with supervision, pick out what she needs to wear and pretty much dress herself....She has been potty-trained since age 10.... 

She understands English and Spanish perfectly....She can sign beautifully and is approaching the speaking vocabulary of a two year old...(about 300 words)...She recognizes many pictures and will approximate many words....She is saying 3-4 word sentences...She likes to show me how she can say "This is __________.  (She reminds me of a cockatiel I used to have, who would practice words, also... :)   I can actually have "conversations" with her now....We also communicate greatly by touch...and by facial expessions.  She is a comic....She has temper tantrums and is learning to behave properly and for the most part is joyful....She is high-spirited and I in turn, am delighted with her...just for who she is....We have a happy home...a peaceful family life....

She has an amazing memory...She is still the master of problem solving....although she is very much protected from escaping and the house is totally baby-proofed...Her creativity has decreased a little. She takes care of her dollies for her play and is going through the steps of wanting to print.   

We watch Catholic church together for long periods of time during the day....She has grown accustomed to the ringing of bells, Latin and can do the sign of the cross, plus say "Amen" at the appropriate time....

She is my only child....Homeschooling has given me a fresh new perspective . I still have expectations...She still will grow in independence and will increase her vocabulary...There is a lot to look forward to!!!! The learning never ends!!!!!

I have a child with whom I can still cuddle....She will never lie to me....I have a relationship with my child that few moms with teenagers have.....There is so much hope, there is so much to learn...I will be doing academics with her and through speech therapy I am increasing the rapport with her so she will want to work with me.....This should prove to be a wonderful experience for both of us....

I love being alone with my child.....My child....one with whom I am no longer exposed to numbers or charts of where she needs to be....The bond is amazing......There is love and acceptance......

I  will be praying for you....I know how it feels to be where you are...between hope and your own observations of joy and the reality of what a therapist sees....I pray you will take these evaluations with a grain of salt....Never lose hope.....Always look up and beyond ....Cherish every moment you can....There will be far more to be delighted about than what is measurable on paper...:)

jjamom
by Silver Member on Nov. 10, 2010 at 8:32 AM

I remember every time Alex would have a review.  I'd go over everything with them and then after they left, I'd look at it all over again and cry.  Then, I'd put it away and sort of forget about it, especially numbers wise.  I learned that they HAVE to look at numbers, it's unfortunately how they assess and how they qualify him for services), but I learned to look at his growth - what he could do then that he couldn't do a day, week, or month before.

We were lucky that most of our therapists were on-time most of the time.  But, it was overwhelming at times, having PT, OT, Infant Ed, and then ST later on.  We constantly had people in our home, which can be difficult.  But, I was glad that for those early years Alex was in his own environment, his comfort zone.

This is my son's 3rd year of preschool now, and I have definitely had the panic moments where I have thought he's too young for school, too young to ride, the bus, etc.  But, he has absolutely loved school from day one.  He's a very social little boy and loves being around all the other kids and even adults.  He only just started riding the bus this year (my choice) and loves it too.  He gets upset if we miss it and I have to drive him!

Hang in there, I know they are tough.

 

Rayelen
by Member on Nov. 10, 2010 at 8:53 AM
Hang in there. It's the percentages that keep the services coming. I hate hearing them also. My little one just started kindergarten and he loves it and the kids love him. He started school at 2, going 2 days a week(on a bus for 30 minutes each way), then started preschool at 3 which was 4 days a week(on a bus for 5 minutes). The bus ride was a good transition to school. He had a harder time adjusting to school if I took him. He doesn't get to ride the bus to kindergarten as the school is right down the street but he doesn't need the transition any longer.
ajs34
by Member on Nov. 10, 2010 at 7:29 PM

Thank you everone.  It is so nice to be able to talk with people that understand, and have been there.  Today went ok, I lived through it.  Ethan will stay in early intervention till Sept of 2012, then school bound.  The thing with that is he will be on the bus forever, get on the bus at 645 and off at 345, 5 days a week. I might end up picking him up half days when i can that way it will be not so long. Also thinking of sending him to daycare next year once or twice a week for more socialization.  It seems like all of that is so far away but i now how time flies and it really is just around the corner.

Thanks again for everything,

Aimee

helenm4
by Member on Nov. 14, 2010 at 7:28 PM

Focus on his accomplishments no matter how small they may be.  I look at pictures of my little one and I realize that he has come a long way. 

aliciajacinta
by Member on Nov. 15, 2010 at 8:26 AM

This is the time that you need to step up and state as to what you want for YOUR CHILD.If you do not step up and explain or demand what you want for you son,then the people that are doing the IFSP,will do it for you and in the long run will HURT your child. if he knows his signs,points to his feet and other body parts,then make sure that all this documented in his file( and get a copy),the copy is for your records and also if he starts school in 2012,make sure that this information that you have had placed in his records go with him.DO NOT ASSUME THAT HIS THERAPIST AND THE PEOPLE DOING THE TESTS WILL SUBMIT THOSE RECORDS.You need to become a advocate for your child starting NOW.All this records that he has been doing for his IFSP,get copies for your self,open a file for him starting now and keep it until he finishes HS and beyond. The therapist is somewhat your employee,you set the rules about when you want her or him to visit your son,the reason this therapist is your employee in a way,is because IT'S YOUR INSURANCE OR MONEY THAT IS  paying for her or his services.YOU sent the time and WHEN you want him or her to visit.They have to call and confirm  if it is alright to visit  so and so day,NOT WHEN THEY WANT TO COME.The reason you do this and SET your time,is because it's true you do have a family life,but you also have commitments as doctor appoints, shopping,spending time with your family. Age 2 is not too young or him to be enrolled in a special school,my daughter was enrolled at age 5 months in a private school for DS children.It help her alot to be around other children,liked school alot,and when she was ready to attend public school she was ready and no crying out  like other children. Good luck,with your preious baby and if you need any more help,you can contact me thru cafe mom. You said your son will be on the bus like forever,check with your Dist,some will pay you,during the school year,you are called a private contractor.I did that thru out Alicia's School Year,up until she graduated from HS. I did this because the bus would pick her up at 5:30 am and school did not start until 8:30,so to me she had no business being in a bus at 5:30.Find out and become his bus driver.

Rosie
VeronicaTex
by on Nov. 15, 2010 at 10:40 AM

Thank you so much for pointing this out...especially to mothers that are new to this....I had a good friend who had adopted a Down Syndrome boy and did this because she was a kindergarden teacher and knew what to expect....and was assertive.

I had NO idea, was only trained to be an elementary teacher of older kids, so I depended on the therapists to take over and do their job....They were good...only one really rubbed me the wrong way when she kept pushing reality in my face when I had such high hopes for my child.....It is always good to have hope....always....

I finally did step up and take over when I saw that public school, at age 16 just wasn't cutting it for her anymore...and that I felt I could do a much better job of one on one. Except for the mentality of a two-year old as far as conduct and cognitive output she was now within the range of something I knew something about.....Besides that homeschooling allows me to have 6-7 more hours with her as my daughter, and not someone who is being prepared for a sheltered workshop or group home.....This is what I feel is best for her....She does not lack in any way of getting an education or being out in public.....She is very much part of a family who loves and appreciates her...but a family that still has hopes that the learning and growth will continue.  :)

Quoting aliciajacinta:

This is the time that you need to step up and state as to what you want for YOUR CHILD.If you do not step up and explain or demand what you want for you son,then the people that are doing the IFSP,will do it you you and in the long run will HURT your child. if he knows his signs,points to his feet and other body parts,then make sure that all this documented in his file( and get a copy),the copy is for your records and also if he starts school in 2012,make sure that this information that you have had placed in his records go with him.DO NOT ASSUME THAT HIS THERAPIST AND THE PEOPLE DOING THE TESTS WILL SUBMIT THOSE RECORDS.You need to become a advocate for your child starting NOW.All this records that he has been doing for his IFSP,get copies for your self,open a file for him starting now and keep it until he finishes HS and beyond. The therapist is somewhat your employee,you set the rules about when you want her or him to visit your son,the reason this therapist is your employee in a way,is because IT'S YOUR INSURANCE OR MONEY THAT IS  paying for her or his services.YOU sent the time and WHEN you want him or her to visit.They have to call and confirm  if it is alright to visit  so and so day,NOT WHEN THEY WANT TO COME.The reason you do this and SET your time,is because it's true you do have a family life,but you also have commitments as doctor appoints, shopping,spending time with your family. Age 2 is not too young or him to be enrolled in a special school,my daughter was enrolled at age 5 months in a private school for DS children.It help her alot to be around other children,liked school alot,and when she was ready to attend public school she was ready and no crying out  like other children. Good luck,with your preious baby and if you need any more help,you can contact me thru cafe mom. You said your son will be on the bus like forever,check with your Dist,some will pay you,during the school year,you are called a private contractor.I did that thru out Alicia's School Year,up until she graduated from HS. I did this because the bus would pick her up at 5:30 am and school did not start until 8:30,so to me she had no business being in a bus at 5:30.Find out and become his bus driver.


AuntGranny
by Group Owner on Nov. 18, 2010 at 5:05 PM

Look at what our kids can do.  I am so proud of what Nathan is able to do!  I am also aware of areas he needs to work on, don't tell me percentages, tell me what we can do together to help him achieve more.

ajs34
by Member on Nov. 19, 2010 at 4:45 PM


Quoting AuntGranny:

Look at what our kids can do.  I am so proud of what Nathan is able to do!  I am also aware of areas he needs to work on, don't tell me percentages, tell me what we can do together to help him achieve more.


Exactly what i think.  Its also what i told Ethan's coordinator.

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