Differences Between Republicans and Democrats...
Republicans say "Merry Christmas!" Democrats say "Happy Holidays!"
* Republicans help the poor during the holidays by sending $50 to the Salvation Army. Democrats help the poor by giving $50, one buck at a time, to panhandlers on the street.
* Democrats get back at the Republicans on their Christmas list by giving them fruitcakes. Republicans re-wrap them and send them to in-laws.
* Democrats let their kids open all the gifts on Christmas Eve. Republicans make their kids wait until Christmas morning.
* When toasting the holidays, Republicans ask for eggnog or mulled wine. Democrats ask for a "Bud."
* When not in stores, Republicans shop from a catalog. Democrats watch for "incredible TV offers" on late night television.
* Democrats do much of their shopping at Target and Wal-Mart. So do Republicans, but they don't admit it.
* Republican parents have no problem buying toy guns for their kids. Democrats refuse to do so. That is why their kids pretend to shoot each other with dolls.
* Republicans spends hundreds of dollars and hours of work decorating the yard with outdoor lights and Christmas displays. Democrats save their time and money, and drive around at night to look at *other* people's lights.
* Democrats' favorite Christmas movie is "Miracle on 34th Street." Republicans' favorite Christmas movie is "It's a Wonderful Life." Right-Wing Republicans' favorite Christmas movie is "Die Hard."
* Republicans always take the price tag off expensive gifts before wrapping. Democrats also remove price tags off pricey gifts ... and reposition them to make sure they are seen.
* Republicans wear wide red ties and green sports jackets during the festive season. Democrats do too, all year round.
* Most Republicans try, at least once, enclosing indulgent, wretchedly maudlin form letters about their families in their Christmas cards. Public ridicule from Democrats usually discourages them from doing it again.
* Democrats' favorite Christmas carol is "Deck the Halls." Young Democrats' favorite Christmas carol is "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer." Republicans' favorite Christmas carol is "White Christmas." Young Republicans' favorite Christmas carol is "White Christmas."
* Cheapskate Republicans buy an artificial Christmas tree. Tight-fisted Democrats buy a real tree, but they wait until the week before Christmas when the lots lower their prices.
* Democrat men like to watch football while the women fix holiday meals. On this, Republicans are in full agreement.
* Republicans see nothing wrong with letting their children play "Cowboys and Indians." Democrats don't either, as long as the Indians win.
* Republicans first began thinking like Republicans when they stopped believing in Santa Claus. Democrats became Democrats because they never stopped believing in Santa Claus.
lmao
I do have to disagree just 3 points.
1. republicans are not too proud to admit that they shop at Wal-Mart.
2. republicans do not all go all out with Christmas decorating, as many of us are financially unable to be lavish with decor.
3. republicans are not so because we stopped believing in santa. we are republicans because we teach our children the spirit of santa, and the real reason for CHRISTmas.
all of the others were pretty good. not trying to be critical, just trying to make sure the republicans are better represented. :) that is what you were going for, right? :)
Quoting KaMomma:
I do have to disagree just 3 points.
1. republicans are not too proud to admit that they shop at Wal-Mart.
2. republicans do not all go all out with Christmas decorating, as many of us are financially unable to be lavish with decor.
3. republicans are not so because we stopped believing in santa. we are republicans because we teach our children the spirit of santa, and the real reason for CHRISTmas.
all of the others were pretty good. not trying to be critical, just trying to make sure the republicans are better represented. :) that is what you were going for, right? :)
I don't care because I didn't write it. I found it on a website and if you care to know what website I got it from, I will gladly give it to you, if you want to PM me, as there are many more jokes there. hahaha.
Quoting KaMomma:
I do have to disagree just 3 points.
1. republicans are not too proud to admit that they shop at Wal-Mart.
2. republicans do not all go all out with Christmas decorating, as many of us are financially unable to be lavish with decor.
3. republicans are not so because we stopped believing in santa. we are republicans because we teach our children the spirit of santa, and the real reason for CHRISTmas.
all of the others were pretty good. not trying to be critical, just trying to make sure the republicans are better represented. :) that is what you were going for, right? :)
I must agree with all three points! I shop at Wal-Mart, my dad used to take us when I was a kid around the neighborhood to see the lights, and I so believe in CHRISTmas!!!
Well I am a Democrat and I give donations to Salvation Army and Goodwill. I give the pan handlers $5 because Jesus said when you give money to the poor you give it to me, when you clothed the poor you cloth me, when you feed the Hungry you feed me. when you visit those in prison you visited me.
So I feel I know What the season is about and as my children have learned by watch what I do, not by what I say. I do not worry about the Tax Deduction, the Republicans are demanding the receipt from Salvation Army. So much for not letting the left hand know what the right hand is doing. Jesus said if you get your reward on Earth you will not get it in Heaven. It is also said it is harder for a rich man to enter into the Kingdom of Heaven than a camel to thread the eye of a needle.
Dixiecharmer
Charcoal...
- brieri
on Nov. 29, 2009 at 2:52 AM