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Why are you doing this?

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 1:29 PM
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Feel free to post anounomously but I would love to know, and Im sure others would too, what made you choose to do the love dare? How did you find out about it? What are you hoping to get out of this? Does your spouse know?

by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 1:29 PM
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Replies (1-10):
RomansMommy0108
by Member on Jan. 15, 2012 at 1:34 PM

Ill go first. Im Kat, age 22, married for 2 years, we have 2 children ages 3 and 4 months. Ever since the birth of our youngeest, DH and I have been quite distant, emotionally, physically, sexually. I long to have our connection back, I feel as though the distance will only grow unless we try to change it. DH also has a porn habit that was never an issue before, but has become one for me now. Mostly because it seems to be porn instead of me rather than occasionally and in addition to me as it always used to be.

I found this dare through the movie Fireproof. It came on a local channel one night, and I watched it, I had seen it in the video store several times and always wanted to see it. It spoke to me like "wow, thats my life, I am her( we even have the same name Katherine..odd)" So I have decided to do this.I hope to reconnect, in every way a couple should, to have a stronger more honest bond, and to deal with our communication and porn issues.

kikitty
by Group Owner on Jan. 15, 2012 at 10:22 PM

 Well, a few years ago we heard about the movie Fireproof, and watched it together. Seriously, it's one of the FEW movies that have moved me to tears... and the ONLY one that has because I can relate to the characters!

 We were given the book by our in-laws that same year, but it's just sat on a shelf since then.

 I'm doing this because my marriage is in serious need of help. I am hoping that this can not fix our problems, but at least contribute to a better marriage.

 He is a serious drinker, and in the past abused drugs, not to mention he's heavily addicted to pornography. He's never happy, and I just hope that this can bring him some happiness, and hopefully this can help bring him some sort of happiness, and show him that someone loves him enough to stick with him regardless of his faults.

RomansMommy0108
by Member on Jan. 16, 2012 at 8:59 AM

I hope it works for you! Its always hard dealing with someone with addictions. If you dont mind me asking how did you realise he had a porn addiction and not just a habit? What day are you on? Day 3 for me

Quoting kikitty:

 Well, a few years ago we heard about the movie Fireproof, and watched it together. Seriously, it's one of the FEW movies that have moved me to tears... and the ONLY one that has because I can relate to the characters!

 We were given the book by our in-laws that same year, but it's just sat on a shelf since then.

 I'm doing this because my marriage is in serious need of help. I am hoping that this can not fix our problems, but at least contribute to a better marriage.

 He is a serious drinker, and in the past abused drugs, not to mention he's heavily addicted to pornography. He's never happy, and I just hope that this can bring him some happiness, and hopefully this can help bring him some sort of happiness, and show him that someone loves him enough to stick with him regardless of his faults.


sirhc31979
by Member on Jan. 16, 2012 at 9:29 AM

I started doing the Love Dare with my SO to see if our relationship is "true".  We are not yet married, but live together.  We have had our ups and downs and in the past couple months we have been doing really good and seem to be getting ready to take it to the next step.  I wanted to work through the Dares to reassure my self that this is what I really want in life.  I went through a really long, drug out divorce with my past relationship and never want to do it again.

RomansMommy0108
by Member on Jan. 16, 2012 at 3:13 PM


Quoting sirhc31979:

I started doing the Love Dare with my SO to see if our relationship is "true".  We are not yet married, but live together.  We have had our ups and downs and in the past couple months we have been doing really good and seem to be getting ready to take it to the next step.  I wanted to work through the Dares to reassure my self that this is what I really want in life.  I went through a really long, drug out divorce with my past relationship and never want to do it again.

I think your smart for doing it as a preventative!


sirhc31979
by Member on Jan. 16, 2012 at 3:14 PM

Thanks!  How are your Dare's coming along?

Quoting RomansMommy0108:


Quoting sirhc31979:

I started doing the Love Dare with my SO to see if our relationship is "true".  We are not yet married, but live together.  We have had our ups and downs and in the past couple months we have been doing really good and seem to be getting ready to take it to the next step.  I wanted to work through the Dares to reassure my self that this is what I really want in life.  I went through a really long, drug out divorce with my past relationship and never want to do it again.

I think your smart for doing it as a preventative!



RomansMommy0108
by Member on Jan. 16, 2012 at 5:02 PM

Pretty good, today is Day 3 for me. So I got him 4 cocacola glasses ( he collects them) from the dollar store, they are shaped like soda cans, and really cool, I also got him a twix as he was saying yesterday how much he wanted one. He was so excited when i surprised him with the gifts and it was great for me to see/make him so happy :) Also havent spoken negatively for 3 days wich is a BIG DEAL lol.

How are your dare's?

Quoting sirhc31979:

Thanks!  How are your Dare's coming along?

Quoting RomansMommy0108:


Quoting sirhc31979:

I started doing the Love Dare with my SO to see if our relationship is "true".  We are not yet married, but live together.  We have had our ups and downs and in the past couple months we have been doing really good and seem to be getting ready to take it to the next step.  I wanted to work through the Dares to reassure my self that this is what I really want in life.  I went through a really long, drug out divorce with my past relationship and never want to do it again.

I think your smart for doing it as a preventative!




2ndtimemom605
by New Member on Feb. 10, 2012 at 11:30 AM
I wanted to try it,to see if it could help my marriage,but,I'm too resentful to start it now.I'm so unhappy.My DH is inconsiderate,emotionally abusive,controlling,and never satisfied.He criticizes everything,my housework,how the kids are dressed,how I do things,etc...I'm also tired,I'd love to ask for a break from cooking once in a while,without being scared of being called lazy,or being told "I don't want to be a wife",I'm just not motivated to put any effort into our marriage at this moment.
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momtoeight
by New Member on Feb. 25, 2012 at 9:04 PM

I am doing it because I want the best marriage possible.  I watched the movie and was led to do it.  My husband is not a Christian and doesn't believe any of this.  But, I know that if I stay with it he will have to see the change in me.

sirhc31979
by Member on Feb. 29, 2012 at 4:31 PM

My SO does not believe in the church or religion either.  It made some of the dares difficult to do, but stick with it.

Quoting momtoeight:

I am doing it because I want the best marriage possible.  I watched the movie and was led to do it.  My husband is not a Christian and doesn't believe any of this.  But, I know that if I stay with it he will have to see the change in me.


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