Be respectful of others.

It's simple - be nice to others. It's the most important thing for everyone on CafeMom to remember. Give each other the benefit of the doubt - often things online can be more easily misunderstood. Just because someone has a different opinion than you doesn't make their opinion - or yours! - the wrong one. Try not to take things too personally. Oh, and mean people are not welcome on CafeMom.

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Don't harass, personally attack, or gang up on others.

You can be opinionated and say that your opinion is better or different than another opinion. But don't be nasty about it. Disagree with the opinion, not the person. Don't name-call or try to rally support for your "side".

If you must "vent" your feelings about another CafeMom member, do it without identifying her. Don't use her screen name or any other information that is likely to make her recognizable to other members. If a member blocks you, respect her decision and do not send your friends to bug her.

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Slurs, stereotyping, and hate speech are not tolerated.

Slurs, hate speech and attacks aimed at any race, color, religion, national origin, disability or sexual orientation are not tolerated at all on CafeMom and will be removed. Don't stereotype people. It isn't funny and it isn't acceptable.

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Controversial topics and debate are great, but they should be done constructively. Be prepared for others to agree AND disagree with you and your ideas.

When you post something, especially about a controversial topic, expect that your viewpoints and opinions may be vigorously questioned, challenged, and held up to scrutiny. If having your opinions challenged and being expected to defend your position will make you uncomfortable, please don't post about that topic.

CafeMom tries to be a place where people can express their opinion and practice freedom of speech, even if their message is extremely controversial or of questionable validity. That means that you might feel something is "wrong" and doesn't belong on CafeMom, and we might disagree. We feel that sometimes the best way to defend against ignorant or prejudicial speech is with more speech.

Discussion and debate are not only allowed, they are encouraged. But, if a healthy discussion breaks down into an exchange of attacks and insults or becomes too heated, we will take measures to end the discussion. If the discussion is happening in a group, it's up to the Group Owner and Admins to remove the offending posts, according to the CafeMom Mandatory Group Guidelines and their own group's guidelines.

We are particularly sensitive to members criticizing or attacking the parenting styles or parenting decisions of other members. Use sensitivity when expressing your opinion about the way another member is raising her children.

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Use privacy and security settings to control who you share your posts and photos with.

Familiarize yourself with the extensive privacy and security options available to you on CafeMom. You might be completely comfortable sharing your photos with everyone, but would rather keep your journaling to just your friends, and only want to join private groups. Or, it could be the other way around. Whatever you decide is fine with us!

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Don't post something just to inflame or annoy others.

Posts that are meant to only upset another mom or group of moms have no place at CafeMom. They simply pollute the air and make it a less inviting place for everyone. Sometimes posts and comments are unintentionally inflamatory - and we understand that - but we might still remove the post or comment.

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Don't ask other members for help in the form of money, gifts or donations.

We appreciate the stress on you and your family resulting from financial pressures, however, it is not acceptable at this cafe to ask another member for money, goods or services. Instead, you can suggest that members donate to official charities (like the Red Cross or March of Dimes). We have compiled a list of organizations that provide help for moms in need on the Member Resources page.

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Advertising and promotions are allowed ONLY on your profile page, in Journal posts (flagged for the Marketplace), or in groups that allow advertising. You may not PM or Chatterbox your advertisements to other members unless they specifically request information about it.

Advertising includes:

• Work-at-home businesses
• Products that you are selling (personal or professional)
• Job opportunities
• Charities and charitable causes
• Promoting another website (personal, non-business websites are not advertising)
• Promoting your entry in a contest (e.g,. "vote for my baby in the cutest baby contest on xyz.com!")

CafeMom group promotions are not considered advertisements. However, each CafeMom group can only be promoted in a Journal Post once a day. Each person can promote a maximum of three different groups a day. And each group can be promoted to a member in a PM only once. Group promotions do not need to be flagged for the Marketplace.

Pyramid schemes and cash gifting scams are illegal and posting information about these schemes anywhere on CafeMom is prohibited.

In addition, posts soliciting or advertising the availability of children for adoption are not permitted on CafeMom.

There are many things that members are prohibited from listing for sale on CafeMom. Since we're not really a buying/selling site, we rely on Craigslist's list of prohibited or restricted items. In general it's always safest for you to complete transactions involving money or exchanges on websites that are set up for that - like Craigslist, Ebay, Paypal, etc.

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Be respectful of others when posting any content that is adult in nature. Content that is adult in nature should be flagged/sashed. Nude photographs or images are not allowed. Neither are photographs or images of abortion or depictions of violence.

We all have different thresholds for what we are comfortable seeing and reading. In addition, while CafeMom is a site for moms, moms often have their children around! In order to make CafeMom comfortable for everyone, and so any little ones don't see something that they shouldn't, please adhere to the following guidelines when posting content that may not be suitable for everyone:

Cursing and adult content are prohibited in public areas and allowed - with sashing - in other areas of CafeMom.

The public areas include: avatars, screen names, thought bubbles, profile pages (text and images), journal post titles, group names, group descriptions, group avatars, signatures, widgets, showdowns, non-adult section of polls, answers, and other similar places.

If you post a photo or journal post that is adult in nature, check the box that indicates the image or post is “adult” and may not be suitable for everyone. These items will appear with a warning on the site letting other members know that the photo or post may contain adult content.

There are cases where cursing or content will be so extreme that it will be removed regardless of whether the content is flagged correctly. We're all adults, there's no need to go to an extreme.

Have fun, participate in lively discussions and debates, bare your soul but not your private parts. Nude photographs or images are not allowed, though breastfeeding and birthing photos are permitted as long as they are sashed accordingly. We also allow "nude" pictures of babies under 6 months old - we don't believe that it's a wise idea to post nude pictures of anyone older than that. We also allow the posting of photos/images that may contain nudity, as long as they depict a medical procedure and are intended to spread awareness about breast cancer. Such images must be sashed.

We don't allow photographs, illustrations or other images depicting abortions. We understand the rationale for why moms might want to spread this kind of information, but CafeMom is not the right place to do this. And, it's not the right place to post images of violence either.

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Don't share your personal information or anyone else's information.

Would you give your phone number, street address or anything else to a mom you just met in a cafe? Maybe - if you trusted her or knew someone in common. But you probably wouldn't give it out to someone you knew little about. The same is true online. Don't give out your personal information to anyone else unless you're sure it's safe. And, don't give it out in a public area of CafeMom where others can see it too. It will be removed.

Don't give money to people who ask for it online. While their stories may move you, you have no way of knowing if they are legitimate. We can't verify the identities of everyone on the site and you use the site at your own risk. We urge you to learn and follow best practices for staying safe online.

You should also not share or post anyone else's personal information. Don't repost messages from private groups or messages in public places. If the information was posted in a private group, assume that the member wants it to remain private.

We are not responsible for what happens off the site, even if it was organized on CafeMom. Be careful whom you talk to, whom you trust, and what you do in the "real" world based on what you read online.

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