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I lost my baby son Matthew at 21 weeks, im lost and devastated!

Posted by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 2:29 PM
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Hello, im not used to going onto sites like this but Im devasted and lost and really need help.  Is there anyone on this site who has had a late miscarraige whom I could chat to.  On Sat 19th June my waters broke and I went straight to the hospital, they confirmed that my waters were leaking and admitted me, I was 21 weeks pregnant.  On Monday I had a scan and it showed a heartbeat so I thought all was going to be ok.  But Monday night I started getting pains and went into labour.  My beautiful baby son Matthew was born at 11.30am, he was not breathing.  We were totally devasted.  I held him and kissed him.  He looked so like my husband, he had all the same features as his dad.  We buried matthew with his uncle and great grand parents on Wednesday.  Now I am lost and dont know what to do.  We would like to believe that we could concieve again very soon, but Im so afraid.  They think I had an infection and that may have caused my waters to break, but I have to wait for reesults of blood test and tests on the placenta.  Has anyone else gone through this and has had successful pregnancies after?  Please let me know.  Thank you so much xxxx

by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 2:29 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Member on Jun. 27, 2010 at 4:52 PM

I am so sorry about Matthew, that is an unimaginable pain.  Although I cannot commiserate, I will keep all of you in my prayers.  

by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:11 PM

I personally can not relate, but I sat with one of my best friends when she went through this... she was at 26 weeks, and was told (after a target ultrasound) that the baby did not have a spine from the heart up... It was one of the most difficult things I have gone through, and watched her go through. But I can tell you that she has successfully given birth to a son and daughter since then.

I personally have had 2 miscarrages first at 12 weeks and the second at 6, I have given birth to my DD between both losses.

I know this is not an easy time, and I am so sorry for your loss. You will be in my prayers, and if you would like to chat, just add me.

by Member on Jun. 27, 2010 at 9:28 PM

i'm so sorry mama. i too miscarried a little boy at 20 weeks. i had two early miscarriages after that BUT, the good news? i had a healthy, happy baby boy who is now almost one. while right now you're whole world is spinning and you feel like things will never be right again, i promise, in time, there will be happiness in your world. there is absolutely hope for a new pregnancy and a healthy baby. don't give up. don't despair. there will be brighter days ahead, i promise! you're not alone!!

by Member on Jun. 27, 2010 at 10:22 PM

 I am so very sorry for your loss. I cannot even imagine what you are going through. I miscarried at 8.5 weeks and was completely devistated...I will keep your family in my prayers. My friend has misscarried 3 times and has one beautiful baby girl age 2 and is pregnant with baby #2 and doing great! Hang in there, mama!

by New Member on Jun. 28, 2010 at 7:46 AM

Thank you so much for your posts and prayers, its very hard to get through the day at the moment ...  I just keep seeing Matthews little face everywhere I look.  I am trying to be hopeful about the future, please God, I will have a baby in the future but right now it feels like life is not worth living.  Please pray for us and thanks a million xxxx

by on Jun. 28, 2010 at 10:13 AM

I am so sorry for your loss.  You will be in my prayers.  ::hugs::

by on Jun. 28, 2010 at 7:33 PM

Sooooo Sorry for your Loss!!!! What a painful story!! We are all here for you!! XOXO

by Member on Jun. 28, 2010 at 11:45 PM

Oh hun I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I hope and pray that you and your DH are successful in TTC again soon .It is not abnormal to feel "lost"...know that you are feeling exaclty what anyone would be in your position. Don't be afraid to feel upset, allow yourself time to grieve, you will know when it is time to try again. 

Keep your chin up, it is such an unbearable feeling to not have any control over your body, but do remember that God has a plan for all of us, even if we do not understand it. Keeping you and your family in my prayers. Good luck to you. hugs

by New Member on Jun. 29, 2010 at 8:18 AM

I am soo sorry for your loss and understand what you are going through.  I lost a little girl at 20 weeks, she had no heartbeat.  I was induced and gave birth to her, and we buried her on top of my husbands grandfather.   I lost her on Jan 5 of this year, and was just crying about it last night.  I go in and out of periods of beign able to deal.  I know that she is outr guardian angel watching over and protecting us.  We are currently trying to conceive and on month 3 of really trying.  You will get through this.  Message me if you need to.

by New Member on Jul. 7, 2010 at 2:13 PM

hello, im sorry for your loss i went through a similar thing in aprilof this year my waters broke on mon 26 april and i was 22 weeks pregnant my husband took me to hospital where we were admitted we were told that all my waters had gone and there was nothing they could do the baby was going to be born our baby was fine and was still moving around which made it even harder for me sadly on wed 28 april i had to give birth to our beautiful baby girl it has beeen so hard for usthe last couple of months but very slowly we are getting there somedays are really bad but you will find it a little easier with tiime. I know no one can make you feel any better at the moment you just need to stick together and support each other my husband has been my rock and i couldnt have got through this without him. we are just starting to try again but it has stilll only been 10 weeks since we went throught this most devastating experience. message me if you want to chat xxx

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