What do you think your children lack because they are being raised by only you?
I get stressed out a lot and tend to lash out at my children. I feel awful about it. Even a trip to the grocery store can be a nightmare for me if my children are in any type of mood. I find myself eating or sitting outside chain smoking when I get stressed. I strive everyday to provide everything for my children, its just soo hard at times. I just end up feeling worn out and stressed out.
I just became a single mom again, about 2 months ago. I've been having a hard time dealing with the reality of it all, although most days, I'm pretty confident and hopeful. But some days it's overwhelming...and it sucks going from being a family to being a single mom of two.
What I think my kids lack? THEY lack nothing. Without them I wouldn't have the strength to stay strong. But my LO certainly misses being around her daddy everyday. SHe sees him every few weeks right now. She'll be 3 in August. She doesn't know what's going on but I bet she's confused. My 8 year old was my ex's step daughter. She, I think, has resentment over the breakup, and I think it'sa against him. SHe's been very portective and understanding with me and I am doing everything I can to make her and her sister happy.
This is going to be a long road. But it's so much better for us in the long run.
Im glad that you have found it in you to embrace being a single mother again. It is one of the hardest things I have ever done. Being single and raising 3 children was not what I had imagined my life being like at all, but I know it was for the best and us, too, will be happier in the long run. My 6 year old blames me when her father doesnt come to get her. My oldest is very sad that her father has never been a part of her life and my yougest, she is just as happy and content as she could be. Her older sister got to know their father better then she did because we split up when she was 7 months. It just makes me sad sometimes. And being alone and having little help is very hard. Idk why I am sharing all of this but I think I just need to get it out somewhere. I am guilty of relying on my 9 year old too much because I have no help. I expect her to help me out more so then the other children and I feel feelings of guilt about it a lot.
I struggle with not getting a mental break when I need one. I also livein an apartment where, I need to take my DD to throw out garbage, get mail, do laundry and that gets to me because sometimes, Id like to be able to throw my garbage out when it is full late at night...LOL Simple things I struggle with. Oh and my on line classes, I struggle because it's ma, ma, mom, mommy, ma every 2 minutes...LOL
I have no Idea what I am doing. I am taking it one day at a time. I am newly single with 2 kids and this is also my 1st time being on my own. I am currently still looking for a job which I have no one to watch my kids to go to said job once I find one. I don' want to work fast food, but that is my last option. You gotta do what you gotta do. I think it's just hard trying not to break down right now from all the stress and being alone and doing and dealing with everything yourself. I don't have any support. and I the little friends I have, I don't want to burden them with my problems.
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