How to get a 5 year old to quit complaining.

[MissElissa21]

My daughter is 5 and all she does all day long is complain. She whines she is hungry, tired, bored, being annoyed by little bro, wants to watch TV, hungry again, not feeling well, hates cleaning, doesn't want to go to bed, hates school, etc etc. She is driving me nuts! I ask her what's wrong, what I can do to make her happy and she tells me what she wants, I comply sometimes and sometimes she gets told no and then the new whines start. "why not, why can't I, what about if I, but ...." I can't take it much longer, I am going to lose it on her, and I know I will feel like a jerk when that happens, but the child does not stop complaining long enough to listen and has an excuse for everything! It's been going on for about 2 years please tell me it's just a really long phase!

[ceciliam]

Sounds like she is looking for attention.

[amyjane22]

My son is 5 and gets a little whiney sometimes. I just tell him that I'll only listen to him and answer his questions if he can ask me like a big boy. It helps.

[MissElissa21]

That's what I think, but short of following her around and yaking her ear off, I don't know how much more attention I can give her! She tells me about everyone at school, all of her friends, everyone in the family, she asks how everyone is related, we have conversations all day long. We play a board game almost every night together and read a bedtime book. We have breakfast and dinner together every day(except when I work). Even when we are talking, she is whining about something. Usually her friends or me doing/not doing something that resulted in her doing/not doing something.

Quoting ceciliam:

Sounds like she is looking for attention.

[MissElissa21]

I do that and it helps for a few minutes, and then she is back to it :( I just hate having to repeat myself every 5 minutes to get her to pay attention to what I am saying and stop complaining.

Quoting amyjane22:

My son is 5 and gets a little whiney sometimes. I just tell him that I'll only listen to him and answer his questions if he can ask me like a big boy. It helps.

[MissElissa21]

Would it be totally childish to talk to her in *whine* all day? lol

[countrygirlkat]

I wouldn't repeat yourself.  Tell her once that she needs to speak with a big girl voice and then don't talk to her or acknowledge her when she doesn't.  She will catch on and will start to do it, but you reminder her goes in one ear and out the other.  If she has to stop and think, "why is mom ignoring me?" the lesson will stick longer when she realizes to get what she wants she has to stop whining. 

Quoting MissElissa21:

I do that and it helps for a few minutes, and then she is back to it :( I just hate having to repeat myself every 5 minutes to get her to pay attention to what I am saying and stop complaining.

Quoting amyjane22:

My son is 5 and gets a little whiney sometimes. I just tell him that I'll only listen to him and answer his questions if he can ask me like a big boy. It helps.

[tweetyfan]

I so feel your pain ....hugs and hang tough

[GaBrIeLlEsMaMa]

lol do we have the same daughter?? My 5 year old is the exact same way! She knows we dont do anything fun on the weekends until her room is clean but she whines alllll weekend long and wont clean because "cleaning is sooooo borring" or "but Im hungry/tired/thirsty/dont feel good" ahhhh it never ends! and no its not attention because she gets one on one time with both dh and I each day and he even takes her shopping with him every weekend just them so I can get the little ones to go to sleep (nobody wants to take a nap when big sis is home, shes just to much fun, so you can imagine what winter break was like..eeeek!)

[MissElissa21]

It's the same! She was supposed to give us 10 minutes of tidying the playroom and instead she complained her way to a nap and then bargained by "cleaning it all" when she got up. Yea, it took her 2 hours and she complained her leg hurt, she was dying of thirst, cleaning is boring, I can't clean because "My body does not like the exercise cleaning requires"<~Direct quote from her right before dinner. I was literally sitting next to her at my sewing table while she was cleaning and I was guiding her through the whole room and she was still complaining about it. I try to ignore her, but then I feel like I am hurting her feelings and making her whine louder, so I talk nicely and she still complains, then we argue and she either gets put on the wall for a time out and I go outside, or, time runs out and she has to get ready for dinner/bed!

Quoting GaBrIeLlEsMaMa:

lol do we have the same daughter?? My 5 year old is the exact same way! She knows we dont do anything fun on the weekends until her room is clean but she whines alllll weekend long and wont clean because "cleaning is sooooo borring" or "but Im hungry/tired/thirsty/dont feel good" ahhhh it never ends! and no its not attention because she gets one on one time with both dh and I each day and he even takes her shopping with him every weekend just them so I can get the little ones to go to sleep (nobody wants to take a nap when big sis is home, shes just to much fun, so you can imagine what winter break was like..eeeek!)

[Midnight-Dream]

Oh lord...My son is 8 and does the same thing....I feel for ya, hang in there,,,