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how would you feel about a person who.... *eta* *another edit!!* **and again!!!*

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has a child, has a job, and has a boyfriend (not the childs father). when she isnt working, shes with the boyfriend. she constantly drops her kid off either at great-grandmothers or at a babysitter...LIES about having to work just to see "boyfriend" and stays away from the child pretty much completely??

the child is 1.5yrs old...your niece. the girl is your SIL. shes been doing this ever since she met the guy. before she works and after work she is with the guy. only comes home to sleep, while kid is sleeping. gets up "pretends" she got called into work. on her days off she drops kid off wherever she can and goes to be with this guy. poor little girl doesnt understand why her mom isnt around!! she hasnt been being herself, extra fussy.

i feel bad for the little girl :( she got dropped of here yesterday morning at 7AM and didnt get picked up til 7AM this morning!!! why??? so she could "go to florida and mow/do yard work" with boyfriend!!!! she NEVER takes her kid anywhere with her!!!!!

ETA: there's no point in trying to talk to her...she feels shes doing nothing wrong. she thinks she is right about every single thing and everyone is wrong. theres no getting through to her. and sadly the ones watching the baby wont stand up and tell her no!

another edit for the confused lol:: the childs "father" is NOT my brother. i say shes my "sil" because my fiance is her brother. i also dont think shes a "horrible" mother, i do not agree with what shes doing...she did this with the last guy she was "with" but this time its lasting a lot longer...and its sad for the girl.

Another edit:: To get things straight.. *I* am not "enabling" her to do any of this. I stopped watching her child a long time ago after she refused to listen to me (and after she got yelled at by her mom to come back to get her child I told her to take with her!). The grandmother (The baby's great-grandmother) is allowing this..and so is the other babysitter. The child's father is with another girl...he left SIL when she was 6 months pregnant after he told her "if you get pregnant, i wont leave i'll be with you and i wont cheat" well...obvious lie. He with with that girl and she is now pregnant. The father is no better than the mother. She won't listen to ANYBODY about this stuff. The "boyfriend" knows about the child, they've all been around each other. But she always makes excuses as to why she can't bring the kid with her (we're going bowling..ok, put her in a stroller let her watch!) or does things JUST so she CAN leave her (going to the movies)...

by on Apr. 29, 2012 at 3:55 PM
Replies (391-395):
EmoMommyFUFU
by on May. 26, 2012 at 11:18 AM


Quoting Megzboys:


Quoting EmoMommyFUFU:

Call the boyfriend. Let him know that his new girlfriend is a shitty mother. When she comes to you slap her shitless. While she cries tell her whay a piece of yrash she has become and that her baby is going to be a meth user because she abandons him. threaten to call cps if she does not accept motherhood. And then kick her the fuck out of your home and dont let het back in unless she os visoting WITH the baby.


    Ok so the name calling and violence is not going to help in this matter.  Intervention needs to take place and if she still does not see anything wrong with what she is doing, somebody needs to go through the right channels to take her away from her defective mother and let some couple who can't have children adopt her.   Or if someone in her own family wants her that is even better because she will still be with famliy members but will be loved.    Then that defective mom needs her tubes tied.

So...no slapping? :< phooey.

Personal’s not the same as important. People just think it is.” ― Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies
powow65
by kimmy on May. 26, 2012 at 1:34 PM
sadly the child might "hate" the mother when she gets older. :(
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celestegood
by Ruby Member on May. 26, 2012 at 2:47 PM
Sadly, I doubt a good slapping would help.

Quoting EmoMommyFUFU:


Quoting Megzboys:



Quoting EmoMommyFUFU:

Call the boyfriend. Let him know that his new girlfriend is a shitty mother. When she comes to you slap her shitless. While she cries tell her whay a piece of yrash she has become and that her baby is going to be a meth user because she abandons him. threaten to call cps if she does not accept motherhood. And then kick her the fuck out of your home and dont let het back in unless she os visoting WITH the baby.


    Ok so the name calling and violence is not going to help in this matter.  Intervention needs to take place and if she still does not see anything wrong with what she is doing, somebody needs to go through the right channels to take her away from her defective mother and let some couple who can't have children adopt her.   Or if someone in her own family wants her that is even better because she will still be with famliy members but will be loved.    Then that defective mom needs her tubes tied.

So...no slapping? :< phooey.

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celestegood
by Ruby Member on May. 26, 2012 at 3:05 PM
So sad for the kiddos.

Quoting ashleymosq:

Sad thing is that sounds like my SIL. Her dd is now 9 and she has done this ever since she had her. She has 4 kids total, but only has custody of one. She is always trying to find people to watch her dd so she can go off and do what she wants. The last time her dd stayed the night here was the day we had my Shylah's bday party. My niece came over after the party and stayed the night. The next day I had stuff I needed to get done, but it is impossible to get anything done with my niece here. I text my SIL about 11 to come get here. She didn't finally call us until after 5. She had my DH drop her dd off at a store for someone to come get. He didn't just leave her though. He waited until someone showed up. My SIL said that her phone died and the truck broke down. She called us from her phone to tell us to take her dd from the store. The next day she was running all over the place in the truck. It was a Sunday so there wasn't any place open to get the truck fixed and they are always broke so no one to pay to fix it. So yeah. This always happens with this girl. My DH wants to do something to help. We even considered trying to get custody of our niece, but this girl is bad. She lies, she steals, she teaches our DD horrible things. I know this little girl needs help, but we aren't able to give it. He don't want to call CPS, so I don't know what to do. Oh and it is the 9yr old that lies and steals.

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celestegood
by Ruby Member on May. 26, 2012 at 3:06 PM
I agree-they would be better off adopted and wanted than with parents who don't want them. So sad.

Quoting JeanZavala:

I've had a friend like that and I can understand your frustration. Some people just aren't mother figures and doesn't get the concept. In my friends case, she had a baby young and for the wrong reasons. She was a single mother and since the dad didn't want anything to do with her or the child, she didn't either. It's sad to say but some women are better off giving up their kids for adoption so they can have a better home rather than being raised in a broken home with no parents who wants them around. Just my opinion....
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