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Smarter Living: Dealing with family during the holidays

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Many of us are wrapping up gifts, packing up suitcase to travel to be with family...a good thing, a thing we all are craving these days after our world has shaken been, again. But even sometimes, family can be tough to deal with.

Mamajamma writes: "I love my family. I do. Even their flaws. But we see each other at the holidays, those flaws are magnified. I try my best to deal with arrogant behavior or kids who are spoiled or those relatives that just sit there and expect the rest of us to wait on them...but it's tough. What's the best way to deal with the not-so-great parts of family gatherings?"

First and foremost, we love our families. Period. That isn't in question, but sometimes scurrying around to get stuff done while others don't lift a finger or tackling a kid who has less-than-stellar manners and demands you to do things, well, it can take the joy out of the most joyous time of year.

The main idea is to adjust your expectations. People don't change overnight. Be prepared mentally. If your mother-in-law tends to hand out nagging comments, tell yourself this year isn't going to change, but maybe have a internal game where you guess how many she doles out. Or that 12-year-old who has never heard the word "No?" Have him help you, give him little tasks to keep him busy.

These ideas won't change the behavior of folks, but at least it can help you control how you react to them. Ahead of time, plan a mantra to keep your own emotions in check when your Uncle John goes on Uninformed Political Tirade #12 of the day.

Are you gathering with family this holiday season? How do you handle tricky situations with your family?

Š saw 

by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Replies (11-20):
by Platinum Member on Dec. 19, 2012 at 3:03 PM
I would love for me&fam to see each more than every once in awhile! And close quarters are fun for a short vacay!
by Kira on Dec. 19, 2012 at 3:25 PM
Nope mine is about 5 hrs away but they act like they don't care about us so we won't be seeing them
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 3:25 PM

We always have get togethers in a very large house. Everyone has a chance to escape lol. 

by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 3:30 PM

No gathering...if I'm not really up to it...I may just stay in...

by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 4:02 PM
Just one.
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by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 4:06 PM
When my sister comes all bets are off lol. It really helps if I make meals ahead and freeze them because I know she won't help me so it makes a world of difference to make less work for me.
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by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 4:26 PM
My family is usually ok. I decide in advance that I'm not going to be frustrated by certain things, and try to take the good for what it is.
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by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 6:19 PM

my mother keeps changing the day she's coming up to visit and then my dad on xmas day

by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 6:52 PM

Yes we are!

by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 8:51 PM

 Im pregnant .. so i have a get out of jail pass this year .. even if im rude and i stay in the bathroom so i dont have to be around family .. no one can get mad !!!!

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