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I am new here....

Posted by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:11 PM
  • 14 Replies

 but I want to start of on the correct foot.  I am sure some of you felt surprise and some shock when I posted my reply to my life do-over if I could.  Wishing my Mom didn't die or my sister didn't die are too huge for some women to get their minds around. 

I also need lots of prayers.  My life is very complicated at the moment, illness, worry about children starting new careers, DC budget mess which impacts me, the list is long.  I am also a 100%, service connected, permanent and totally disabled female veteran and I am individually unemployable because of my military related disabilities.  (many)  I survived a crash landing in the Air Force, no not a car, it had wheels though.  I had to drive to my Neurologist today which is a 55 mile trip each way, too bad I have to pass the local AF base and the City Airport.  Today, for whatever reason, the pilots where practicing 'touch and goes' which are quick landings and immediate take offs.  If you have ever flown in an airplane, you know that pull when you get up to speed, well imagine aborting that take off within 100 feet, and the pilot has to put that plane down, then up again, all withing one runway length.  It is so stressful to do, worse to watch, but I was buzzing along the highway, my sun roof open, disco blaring from the Bose speakers, dog snoring next to me, then, the very plane I crashed, pulls off overhead.  OMG.  The thunder of the engines, the squeal of the tires, the burnt fuel, this is all happens about 200 feet over my car.  I almost drove off the highway.  I did not realize I was so scared that I bit my hand with my own mouth until my chin was warm with blood.  The wound is okay, but imagine a B-52 that close to my car and all those triggers and reminders and nerves..........

 

Too much....... brb

by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MsBlueBelle
by Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:12 PM

 

MsBlueBelle
by Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:13 PM

 

MsBlueBelle
by Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:19 PM

 I had no landing gear, it would not come down.  I belly flopped her in, my crew of 13 survived with injuries, but I only cared about my crew, nothing for that bucket of bolts.  A rust bucket.  I was almost down, but another pilot left his plane 4 feet onto the active runway and my wing clipped it and we began a roller coaster motion.....I haven't been near a plane since.  I am thankful I am not on an active airspace, rarely an airplane or helicopter will go over my house.  I can tell by the sound of the engines how stressed that pilot is over my house. 

So, I have fixed my hand and swallowed some happy pills, aka 1 mg of xanax, which I am allowed to take.  I also have my 86 pound furry xanax who will not leave my side.  These are the 'oh shit' moments that hit my life.  Please, please, please, do not ever say, "Thank you for your service", because I would never have done it if I had known what was going to happen in my mind 20's.  Too long to answer that question. 

I will be polite, but if I don't get on for a few days or weeks, it is because I am putting myself in time out and I am in my decompression mode. 

Hugs to all.

MsBlueBelle
by Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:22 PM

Yes, one minute and 15 seconds, land and take off.  I am screaming at my laptop, PULL PULL PULLLLLLLL   

just.me.
by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:34 PM

I'm so sorry.  Thank you for your service.

MsBlueBelle
by Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:38 PM

 http://blog.al.com/spotnews/2013/08/birmingham_911_tapes_in_ups_pl.html

These recordings were released today.  Ugh.

sunshinepraying
by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:39 PM

Wow. I can't imagine how horrible it must have been. I think I would break down with the sound of an airplane after all that as well *hugs*

angieluvsolivia
by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 5:13 PM

So sorry for your losses :(  Hugs momma!

momofsixangels
by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 5:16 PM

Sorry for what you have had to go through,Hugs

proudmommy690
by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 5:23 PM
Welcome to the group. So sorry for everything you've gone through.
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