Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

---how to spot a liar ---

Posted by on Apr. 14, 2012 at 11:37 AM
  • 4 Replies
  • 458 Total Views

how to spot a liar

Have you ever wondered if someone has lied to you? Whether it be in business or a relationship Maybe they said something that just didn't sit right with you, or it just didn't add up? Be aware of your own motivations, too.

Sometimes liars succeed because we want to believe what they say. "Really? I can earn a million dollars just like that, just because you say so?"
Lying is universal If you want to be a master at lie detection and know how to tell if someone is lying, you must know these universal signs of a liar

by on Apr. 14, 2012 at 11:37 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-4):
by Group Owner on Apr. 14, 2012 at 11:38 AM



Usually when someone is trying to convince you of their lies they will look you dead in the eyes and try to hold your stare without blinking, we know this not to be true considering humans need to blink, this is common among liars. Some do the opposite, they look away, look at the floor, anything but look at you this could be a sign of guilt or embarrassment etc.. You decide. Each situation is different.

Another sign would be if when you are asking them a question like "where did you go today" and if their eyes looked to the right their memory side of their brain they are recalling where they went but, if they looked to the right their creation side of their brain they are trying to make up a story. This is based on if someone is right handed, if they are left handed it will be opposite. ask them to write their name

Where you ever accused falsely of lying? Think back on how it made you feel at the time. A truthful person might act angry at being wrongfully accused . This is because they are trying to defend their pride or dignity. A truthful person might say something like "how dare you accuse me of something like that!" This would be called going on the offensive Somebody who is not being truthful will not try to protect his dignity, they will focus solely on trying to convince you of their lie, A liar may repeat your question back to you,often because it gives them time to think of what they are going to say and also to reassure themselves eg: "was I in town today?"

Liars will sometimes imply answers instead of denying them eg:" did you take the money on the table?" resonse:why would i do that?! This is called going on the defensive .If the person gives you too much information that could be another key sign. A liar usually talks fast to get their lie over and done with, and oftentimes they clear their throat a lot. Be aware of these signs as they are indications of a dishonest person.

Liars touch their face and mouth a lot. This is something that most liars can’t control even if they are aware they are doing it. It is a reflexive psychological response to being untruthful, a symbolic way of stopping the lies from coming out. A liar may place something between you and them like a cup, a phone, a chair. this is to place a barrier between you and them and it gives them reassurance. When someone is being truthful they maybe illustrate their story with their hands to describe what they are saying.

A liar dose not move their hands as much as a truthful person as they would have no belief in what they are saying. A liar will usually purse their lips together it means they are holding the truth in, but this is also a sign of anger, but this is easily separated as you will be able to tell based on the topic of conversation.

A liar is usually fidgety, they move around a lot, cant sit still. If you want to know if someone is lying to you, watch their feet. If they are moving their feet much, if they are shaking their legs this is a clear sign of lying, as they are feeling anxious and want to finish up with the questioning. If they try and change the subject fast or if you ask them a question and they go off on a tangent to an unrelated story that is a sign.Just because the person exhibits 1 of these behaviors does not mean they are lying. If they are exhibiting 3 or 4 of them, chances are they are. Just remember, to think about their normal behavior while you decide if they are lying.

by Group Owner on Apr. 14, 2012 at 11:47 AM

(some language)

Scam School: Detect Lies Like LIE TO ME! - Scam School -pt 1

Scam School: How to Spot a LIAR! - Body Language Cues You Can Detect! - Scam School pt2


by Group Owner on Apr. 14, 2012 at 1:19 PM

Catching Liars 101

The bad news: you’re probably terrible at catching lies.

Whoever you are and whatever you do, decades of research by Paul Ekman suggests you do no better than chance at catching lies.

The good news: you probably can get better.

Recent research by an independent scientist showed that those who used Paul Ekman’s emotion training tools – the kind I use in my classes for lawyers and negotiators – did better at catching lies.

More good news: you may not need to catch lies, but just emotions and cognitive overload.

My specialty is negotiation. For me, that means getting what you want. And getting what you want often depends on information, emotional management, and creativity. So you really want to know if you’ve got the kind of emotions that will help you and others reach a deal that benefits you. That’s why emotion recognition matters even if you don’t get better

What do you really want? Do you really want to catch liars?

Sometimes you really do: when I was an associate independent counsel, that was a key part of our job. Did White House officials lie about searching Bill Clinton’s passport files? If they lied, the lie itself was a crime.

What is a lie?

Let’s start with Paul Ekman’s definition. Paul Ekman is the inspiration behind Fox’s Lie to Me and its scientific advisor. That picture where “Dr. Lightman” is looking at facial expressions in a faraway land: that’s Paul Ekman’s body and a real photo with actor Tim Roth’s face!
Paul Ekman defines a lie as: “one person intends to mislead another . . . deliberately. . . .” This definition excludes times when you, the victim, might not get the truth, but the other person didn’t intend to keep information from you.”
Ekman also limits the definition by saying that lies aren’t lies when someone has permission to mislead another, such as actors in a play.

So, whether I want to catch lies or get at the truth, how do I do it?
There are several different ways people have tried. Many of these ways simply don’t work.
There are three kinds of methods that seem to work.

Method 1 that works: working with scientific clues.

One set of methods depends on working with clues that scientific study suggests makes it more likely that a person is lying. Notice that I say more likely. As Paul Ekman teaches, it is Pinocchio’s error to think that there is any clue that always means that someone is lying.

Best science of method 1: facial expressions

In Paul Ekman’s work, he has identified the clues that show up most often when people lie. The number one clue involves very fast changes in the face. These changes reveal concealed emotions. Seven basic emotions each tend to trigger certain sets of muscles in the face. So, the upturned lips and the pushed up cheeks (which make the crow’s feat) reveal a felt smile. (Without that eye movement, you have a felt smile, but no real enjoyment).

Microexpressions, Subtle expressions etc.

Paul Ekman developed an elaborate research method to identify every set of facial movements. He called this the Facial Action Coding System. If you’re really interested, you can learn it from Paul’s manual, a self-study guide with many videos. Or, like me, you can learn in a week long class with Erika Rosenberg, a co-author of the latest book by Paul Ekman on facial expressions and another scientific advisor to Fox’s Lie to Me.
Microexpressions are full expressions of emotion that happen quickly. They happen as fast as one frame of video – 1/30 of a second. The theory: the emotional part of the brain automatically triggers the facial muscles, but the controlling part of the brain clamps down to mask them.
Subtle expressions are slower but only trigger some muscles associated with an emotion. For example, you might just notice the lower lip roll under in a subtle sign of anger.

Other clues to deception

The other sets of clues to deception include body movement, verbal style, voice, and verbal content. I also teach about these clues in my workshops on lie detection.

How can I learn?

If you only have an hour, invest in Paul Ekman’s microexpression training tool. in If you have two hours, invest in the subtle expression training tool. You should also read Paul Ekman’s two popular books, Telling Lies and Emotions Revealed.
But, if you really want to learn, there’s no substitute for a live training. At a live training, you get the full version of the best scientific method: Identify clues, consider hypotheses for the clues, test out the hypotheses. For example, if you’re a lawyer and you ask someone about drug use in a deposition, you may see a sign of sadness. That’s step one. But why is the person sad? You might think they are sad about wasting their lives on drugs. But it might be that the person lost a loved one to drug use. In the third step, you try to get at that information. And that third step is its own science and art: how to ask?

Directly or indirectly

And, if you’re a negotiator, you may just need to know the true feeling. In one picture from my study at Harvard of real estate negotiations, a student said she was confident but showed fear on her face in less than a second. That’s good to know: she might be willing to move way down off her asking price.

To get started, click here to register for an upcoming training.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)