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figured i'd introduce myself

Posted by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 7:44 PM
  • 4 Replies

(this post was written 12/5/09)

Hello. everyone. i just turned 21, i have a 11 month old DD and last night my husband told teh that the "thrill of the chase" was over, and that he was no longer happy and could not be happy again married to me. i feel like my world is falling apart. here are some of my posts in other groups to give you a little background on our issues (i'm including the links so you can view the repilies)..

http://www.cafemom.com/group/42771/forums/read/8835007/should_i_go_see_someone

today my grandparents came out and took me to lunch for mothers' day (yum)...

Paul half ass told me happy mothers' day and didn't even get me a card. i think i may have slight PPD.. but i think most of it comes from feeling unappreciated... i asked him for some cuddle time (i know I'm not getting sex, my shot runs out on Friday and he doesn't want to chance it, even though after my 4 week appointment when the doc told me that we had to use protection or not have sex until i was on BC... then he was like a horny teenager, but now nothing.. he wont even make out with me.) and he said he would be a Lil while longer on the computer then he would spend time with me.... that was at 8:30.... I feel like I'm just the Nanny/chef/maid/chauffeur.. but some times i just want to be his wife.. I'M SICK OF COMING SECOND TO THe COMPUTER!!!!

what do you ladies think, i've tried to talk to him about it, but he doesn't let me finish a sentance, he keeps saying i know i notice more than you think and says he's trying to change, but nothing is changing. I love him very much, but i'm not sure how much longer i can deal with this...

http://www.cafemom.com/group/42771/forums/read/8351119/im_sick_of_going_to_bed_alone_venting

my husband spends all his time on the computer, i go to be every night by myself. last night he didn't even spend time with jasmine. he sat in the back seat of the car with her on the way home from work, but then did nothing but play on the computer.  it seems like I'm a single parent, i understand he works all day and needs to relax but he didn't come to bed until 4AM. he doesn't get up in the middle of the night to feed jasmine (he used to but hasn't in over 3 weeks). he claims he doesn't hear her, but most nights when she starts crying he elbows me to wake me up then puts the pillow over his head.
I understand that I'm home all day and don't have to work so its my job to keep the house clean, but I'm not his slave, he doesn't even rinse his dishes and put them in the dishwasher... i just now got him to put his clothes in the hamper after bitching about it for 6months i never knew what was clean or dirty cuz all his clothes ended up on the floor.    

I'm so upset and pissed   a month ago i asked him to stop playing this stupid computer game he said he would HA that didn't happen.

I'm going to talk to him later when he get off the computer top eat or something

I'm just so lost at what to do, when we first started dating his house was spotless( yes it was only him there but still) he did his own laundry and cleaned up after himself, not if i don't clean up after him he freaks about the house being a mess.

stephanie, 21 mom to jasmine, separated from my DH(his choice not mine). ERF/EH, CIO, non-cosleeping.
yahoo: jasminesmom11209

EPARTY


by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 7:44 PM
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Replies (1-4):
elwalters77
by Erica on Dec. 14, 2009 at 9:03 PM

Well, first, welcome to the group, and I am so sorry to hear that things are not going very well for you.  Hugs sweetie.

Jillysmom
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 9:16 PM

Jasmine, Welcome to the group. Sorry things aren't looking so good right now but don't give up. I was a 21 year old mom of 2 when my 1st husband and I split. I am alot older now  but happy as a I never thought I could be. It will get better.

Dawne98
by on Dec. 15, 2009 at 7:11 AM

I am sorry.....being Married is very hard work I am 37 years old and I have to work at it each day. My dh is not a computer guy but a news man!!!! So I know how you feel but after longs talks my dh told me that is his down time when we gets home from work; I don't like it but I understand it. As for him saying  what he told you....I am sorry just try to talk to him and see if you two can go talk with someone:)

Lisa0626
by Member on Dec. 15, 2009 at 11:58 AM

I am so sorry this is happening to you. I have found out myself that marriage is definetly not easy. You take care of yourself and your daughter first. But, let me give you a website that can help anyone with any situation in a relationship. It takes two to make a marriage work, you can't do it alone, but here it is anyway. www. smartmarriages.com you may find it helpful. Good luck. But don't forget you are an awsome young woman and with or without him you will be fine!

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