Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

"It's OK, she has a dog"....

Posted by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 8:39 PM
  • 12 Replies

Those are the words one of my twins used to tell my mom that it was ok to talk to some woman in a Walmart parking lot.   My mom didn't let her, and couldn't believe that she actually assumed that just because someone has a dog that means they are a good person.   DH and I have told these kids over and over again not to talk to strangers, but it seems they just don't get it and they are almost 11 years old!  They won't, normally, walk up to someone and start talking (thankfully we got them out of that particular habit), but if someone says something to them; no I can't even say them, if someone says something to Ashley, she will practically tell them her life story, with just a little prompting or the right question asked.  Courtney will do just about anything her sister says, sometimes it seems she has no mind of her own.

 I can't seem to get them to understand that there are bad people in the world, people that will use a dog to lure kids in and take them, or claim to have lost a dog; "Will you help me find my doggy?".   They are going into 6th grade, and I don't know what else to tell them, I just can't seem to make them understand that it is not ok to just talk to random people just because they happen to have a dog.   I believe that if someone walked up to those girls and said "I lost my dog, will you help me find it?", they would go eagerly and without question.   

I don't know what to tell them anymore, we've tried explaining, tried to put fear into them, I just don't know what else to do.  I am so afraid that something is going to happen to one of them, all because they want to help, or be nice and they never seem to understand that not everyone is good and means them no harm.

Please, help.  Thank you.

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 8:39 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Mom2Jack04
by Melissa on Aug. 19, 2011 at 8:50 PM

Might have to look around a bit, but i'm sure there are videos and maybe even on youtube about teching them about the potential dangers of strangers

 

SamMom912
by Platinum Member on Aug. 19, 2011 at 9:06 PM

Maybe taking them to a self defense class? I would be helpful for them to see how to react...what to do (may give you peace of mind)  Maybe get a few books from the local library about strangers?
My DS takes karate and for these weeks after that poor little boy Leiby Kletzky was murdered they have been talking about good strangers and bad strangers...

Here is an interesting tid bit that might clue your little ones into not telling too much to people... A few towns over from me there was an ice cream shop... the owner.. a nice man, for 17 years served ice cream to the people in town.. all summer long people would congregate... and small talk like "so, got any fun summer plans? vacations?" was just passing question... and people would answer, going to see my parents in Jersey next weekend... blah blah blah.. for 17 years he was robbing peoples houses based on the little info about vacations and weekends away. 17 years!!!!!

Mystyk_moon
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 9:11 PM


Quoting Mom2Jack04:

Might have to look around a bit, but i'm sure there are videos and maybe even on youtube about teching them about the potential dangers of strangers


Never thought of that, maybe since telling them isn't working it would help to show them.  Thank you

Mystyk_moon
by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 9:16 PM


Quoting SamMom912:

Maybe taking them to a self defense class? I would be helpful for them to see how to react...what to do (may give you peace of mind)  Maybe get a few books from the local library about strangers?
My DS takes karate and for these weeks after that poor little boy Leiby Kletzky was murdered they have been talking about good strangers and bad strangers...

Here is an interesting tid bit that might clue your little ones into not telling too much to people... A few towns over from me there was an ice cream shop... the owner.. a nice man, for 17 years served ice cream to the people in town.. all summer long people would congregate... and small talk like "so, got any fun summer plans? vacations?" was just passing question... and people would answer, going to see my parents in Jersey next weekend... blah blah blah.. for 17 years he was robbing peoples houses based on the little info about vacations and weekends away. 17 years!!!!!

My dad wants them to take karate, they refuse, "it's for boys", I said "I took lessons and if I hadn't gotten knee problems, I would have continued, and I'm not a boy"  they still want nothing to do with it.

I think when they come home tomorrow I will have them read about the ice cream man, it may not be about someone using animals to kidnap children, but it will show them that just saying a little bit can be a little bit too much!

Wyldbutterfly
by Snow Bunny on Aug. 20, 2011 at 9:05 AM

UGH! How frustrating at scary at the same time. I would most definitely look up stories and videos on the Internet.

I know when I was a little girl my parents had family friends. They were a married couple with children. The husband whom I was never comfortable around gave me the willies! He would actually make the hair stand up on my arms, he creeped me out that much. He would always call me Missy Chrissy, Miss America and crap like that.

Many years later I found out why the hair would stand up on my arms and he creeped me out. Turned out he was a child molester and molested his own toddler grand son!

So even people you know sometimes aren't who they seem to be. You can share that story with them too.

That sick pig went to jail for molesting his own grandson. Where he later committed suicide.

elwalters77
by Erica on Aug. 20, 2011 at 6:23 PM

Eeep! I was a very shy little girl, so my parents didn't have this issue. I don't really have any advice, but good luck.

Mystyk_moon
by on Aug. 20, 2011 at 9:29 PM

Thank you so much for the advice and stories, I hope something finally gets the "Stranger Danger" warning to stick

Mom2jngnc
by Stephannie on Aug. 20, 2011 at 10:23 PM

 I really don't know what to say. I've never had this trouble with any of my boys. They even went as far as when a neighbor (who was bent over his garden weeding) said "Hi" to Garrett as he passed on his bike, Johnny screetched to a stop, and screamed back to me "Garrett talked to a stranger" after Garrett said "Hi" back.

I am finding that my niece can be a little too comfrotable with people now that she is over the whole afarid of the world phobia.

 

Chris I have had the same reaction to people. One of them is my nieces Grandfather :( Thankfully my Moms sister also had a 6th sense about her, and had told me when I was young to listen to it. So far so good.

Stephannie, wife to John, Mom to John, Garrett, CJ and Alex
full-time Auntie to Carly-Ann

 
New York Moms
Join us on The New York Moms Group! - - NY Moms Group Mod

lizmarie1975
by Liz on Aug. 21, 2011 at 7:58 AM

Do they have a program in school that highlights Stranger Danger?  I know in my daughter's school they had a whole week dedicated to talking to strangers and the harm that could happen to them.

Maybe you could talk to the administrators in the school & see if they could introduce something like that for the whole school.

Ewa101
by Ewa on Aug. 21, 2011 at 9:10 AM

I remember watching a show on 20/20 about kids responding to inquiries about a lost dog, and the emphasis was on the fact that adults should seek help from adults and not from kids.  Maybe it's possible to find that show and watch it with them.  It is very sad that we have to check the child natural enthusiasm for sharing information about them with others.  On the other hand, as they become teenagers, they will most likely lose the willingness to talk to adults.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)