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Do you tell it like it is?

Posted by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 2:27 PM
  • 17 Replies

In another group there was a post I read.
This woman's hubby sounded like a total A hole. LOL
I mean, hit her (once and apologised) slept with like 30 other women when they were on a little break from each other. Sounds like he is mentally unstable..(talked about meds he takes for some psych diagnosis he has that didnt fit.. and then another DX.. and nothing is monitored and he sees different Dr's..... and uncontrolled anger  (fist fighting with other guys).  Sounds like he just thinks about himself (bought something the family could not afford and her children had to do without something)

So I read this post and all I could think was HOLY Fin Sh*t this woman needs to leave this guy! She is out of her mind if she thinks he will change then she is dead wrong.

All I can think is her poor children!!!! WTF? They didn't ask to be brought up in a situation like THAT- unstable- unpredictable- unsafe.

And I think she is selfish even for wanting to stay.. I MEAN< think about your children....  she AND THOSE KIDS deserve a better LIFE.

I couldn't even respond... I typed a bunch of things--- but just could NOT bring myself to sound sincere and concerned.. I was just angry. I still am. I mean, this aways comes back to that I had a crappy childhood with a crazy parent (thank goodness my dad took me and left my mom! Which back in the 70's it was unheard of to be a single father--- NO one should raise their kids in a crazy environment) AND WHY does God give people like THIS children when so many good people have fertility issues?!?!

When you read stuff here on CM that kind of makes you mad... do you say something? or are there posts too that you JUST cant respond to???!

by on Feb. 8, 2012 at 2:27 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Mom2jngnc
by Stephannie on Feb. 8, 2012 at 3:53 PM
1 mom liked this

 I don't reply... I usually don't finish reading the sob story.... I have NO respect for women who stay in relationships like that.

SamMom912
by Platinum Member on Feb. 8, 2012 at 4:12 PM


Quoting Mom2jngnc:

 I don't reply... I usually don't finish reading the sob story.... I have NO respect for women who stay in relationships like that.

I can understand that...

Mom2jngnc
by Stephannie on Feb. 8, 2012 at 4:49 PM

 but to answer the inital question, I tell it like it is.....

lizmarie1975
by Liz on Feb. 8, 2012 at 5:32 PM

Honestly, I visit this group and another and there is never any type of drama posts in either so I really have no idea what I would say.

lish2127
by Platinum Member on Feb. 8, 2012 at 5:57 PM

I pretty much stay out of stuff. I am not one to debate or give my strong opinion on stuff. Doesn't matter what the topic is these days everyone disagrees or has something to say. I try to think the best of people because you just don't always know the whole truth, but normally I just don't involve myself. I don't like drama.

I've been in situations with abusive men and it's just not always black and white whether you should leave or not. My grandma stayed...things turned out well. My mom stayed a long time, left, went back, left again, and so on...and thank God she finally got out for good or she probably wouldn't be alive.

Cecelia712
by Gold Member on Feb. 8, 2012 at 10:08 PM

I dont respond to those posts on here.  I like to read the posts for the mom confessions but I have never responded to any of the posts because I think most of them are BS and just given to start drama, and also, when there is already 400+ posts, I doubt I can say anything that hasnt already been said.  Is she wrong for staying if he is that dangerous and risk her kids being hurt? Sure, but then again we dont really know the whole story or if she is prone to exxagerate etc... However, in real life I will give my opinion to someone I  know well enough otherwise I stay out of it.  

Jennifair
by Jen on Feb. 8, 2012 at 10:21 PM

I visit 2 groups on a regular basis. If I know the poster I'll say it like it is cause they know me. But if it was someone I didn't know I do not comment. 

Wyldbutterfly
by Snow Bunny on Feb. 9, 2012 at 5:23 AM
1 mom liked this

I would have had ZERO problems telling her her husband was a douche bag and she was a loser for staying. Followed by something else.

I'm glad your Dad was strong enough to do what he did for you. I wish more parents were as strong.


cowfd
by on Feb. 9, 2012 at 7:49 AM

Online, I try to be calm when I reply - but I tell it like I think it is, doing my best to keep the serious negativity out. So instead of telling her that she needs to "get her and her kids out of there right friggin now, your crazy for staying with that psycho", I would say something more like "An emotionally unstable home can often do more severe damage to children than a physically unstable home. The future lives of those children can be tainted forever by a handful of years in a home where they cannot grow up in a house that they can feel safe and secure in. I hope that you've taken the time to be the best mother that you can be, and think only of your children right now, and what this might be doing to them."


That's my way of softening the "get the f out of there now - you're screwing with the lives of your kids!"  -- which is how I really feel. In person, I would be a bit more blunt, and little more passionate.



JoshRachelsMAMA
by JRM on Feb. 9, 2012 at 7:53 AM
Always
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