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Advise please

Posted by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 3:45 AM
Ali
  • 19 Replies

I need advise. Abi is 4 and 1/2. She has been very well potty trained for 1 1/2 years, with very little to no accidents. Anna is 2 years and 3 months, has been potty trained since 18 months. They both still wear diapers at night time because they both have accidents and it makes for way to much laundry.

At naptime Abi pees the bed but Anna doesnt. How do I explain to Abi (who understands a lot for a 4 year old) that it is perfectly OK for her to have accidents while explaining to her why Anna doesnt have them as often? 


by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 3:45 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Bethy16
by Beth on Dec. 18, 2012 at 7:09 AM
Tell her everybody is different. My son wet the bed until he was almost 7.make sure she goes to the bathroom before she naps or sleeps. No liquids after dinner. And you may have to wake her during the night to go. My son was such a deep sleeper he would just not wake up. Now my daughter would not potty train until she was 3 1/2. But when she was ready she literally took the pull up off handed it to me and said I am done. She never had an accident and never wet the bed at night. You may want to talk to your Dr if she is upset and it continues. I know boys and girls are different but it wasn't normal to wet the bed after a certain age. Good luck and just keep reassuring her she is OK just taking a little longer but everyone is different :)
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elwalters77
by Erica on Dec. 18, 2012 at 9:52 AM
Corbin is 7 and still wears good nights pull ups. He even wets the bed through them sometimes. Avery is 3 and wears pull ups to bed. They both wake up dry about 50% of the time. Luckily, Corbin seems to be ok with this. We just let him know that every one is different and in our case, his Daddy wet the bed until he was almost 12. Just let her know that her body might not be ready and that she won't have accidents forever and that it is ok if she does have an accident. Don't compare her to her sister and if she asks tell her that her sisters body is different from hers.
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lovelymomofone
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:04 AM

 I agree with Bethny everyone is different. She is a late bloomer, Leo the late bloomer. Don"t worrie to much about it, She in no time will get the hang of it and before you know it she will no longer be wetting the bed. Best of luck sweetie, And Happy Holidays.

Emschick38
by Ali on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:02 PM
3 moms liked this


Quoting Bethy16:

Tell her everybody is different. My son wet the bed until he was almost 7.make sure she goes to the bathroom before she naps or sleeps. No liquids after dinner. And you may have to wake her during the night to go. My son was such a deep sleeper he would just not wake up. Now my daughter would not potty train until she was 3 1/2. But when she was ready she literally took the pull up off handed it to me and said I am done. She never had an accident and never wet the bed at night. You may want to talk to your Dr if she is upset and it continues. I know boys and girls are different but it wasn't normal to wet the bed after a certain age. Good luck and just keep reassuring her she is OK just taking a little longer but everyone is different :)

I told her that the brain makes this stuff to tell your body to not pee when you sleep but sometimes it takes longer to make enough of it for you to hold it all night. I felt so sad today when we woke up from naptime and she gave me that "why doesnt Anna pee the bed" look. I cant get her to wake up in the middle of the night unless she does it on her own, and we do go to the bathroom when she does wake up. She seemed ok with it tonight when they were getting ready for bed,  She said "So its OK if I pee the bed? and its ok if Anna does?"  I told her it would be ok if mommy peed the bed because sometimes things happen we cant always control. She laughed at me.

jento1
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:26 PM

My daughter is 8 and still wets the bed no matter what I try or dont try.  The issue I have here is that the pull ups (the smallest size goodnites are still too big for her) leak ALL the time and I am desparate to find something to help minimize the laundry.  She is average height but SUPER skinny and right around 38-40 lbs.  She could care less that she wets the bed or wears pull ups and wont lift a finger to help herself stop.  She constantly sneaks drinks past a certain time at night and she flat out refuses to "try" to go potty before bed.  Does anyone know of anything that I can use to help with all the extra laundry???  I have tried trainers in the past but I end up with the same results....wet beds!  Anyone else have an older child that just doesnt care?  How can I help her stop if she doesnt care that she does it in the first place??  HELP!!!  Thanks everyone!

Jennifer

MELRN
by Bronze Member on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:49 PM

I would just tell her  I have to put a diaper on you until you stop peeing when you sleep...simple as that..

I just wanted to comment on one thing I saw on here you should NOT ever wake a child to go to the bathroom this will cause them to have a bed wetting problem LONGER   because what you do is train the BRAIN to go to the bathroom during sleep time....  where potty training occurs is near the frontal left  brain which is an area that  doesnt develope  completely until about age 21  the  potty part is well formed by age 7 and kids who pee the bed after that age are vitems of their parents poor parenting idea like waking them to go to the bathroom just before they themselves go to bed ...bad idea  causes poor brain programming

Bethy16
by Beth on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:49 PM
My ped recommended seeing a urologist. They can ck to see if there is something physically going on and give great advice on what to do. We found out my son wasn't voiding all the way. We worked on him during the day and it finally clicked in. It took a little while but at 8 he finally stopped wetting the bed. I know you said she refuses to go to the bathroom before bed you need to be tough but firm she has to go before she goes to sleep. She is at an age where she is going to want to sleep over friends houses and they will make fun of her if she has a pull up. A lot of praise and rewards. My son had his first sleep over a fwq weeks ago and he is so proud of himself!


Quoting jento1:

My daughter is 8 and still wets the bed no matter what I try or dont try.  The issue I have here is that the pull ups (the smallest size goodnites are still too big for her) leak ALL the time and I am desparate to find something to help minimize the laundry.  She is average height but SUPER skinny and right around 38-40 lbs.  She could care less that she wets the bed or wears pull ups and wont lift a finger to help herself stop.  She constantly sneaks drinks past a certain time at night and she flat out refuses to "try" to go potty before bed.  Does anyone know of anything that I can use to help with all the extra laundry???  I have tried trainers in the past but I end up with the same results....wet beds!  Anyone else have an older child that just doesnt care?  How can I help her stop if she doesnt care that she does it in the first place??  HELP!!!  Thanks everyone!

Jennifer


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jento1
by on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:55 PM

Thanks...we have been to her dr several times as well as a urologist and have been assured that she is perfectly healthy.  She knows what she has to do to help herself stop but she just wont do it.  I havent allowed her to go on any sleepovers as of yet but she still wants to go.  The issue I have is the laundry OMG!  I will ONLY buy pull ups when I just need a break and even with them, I still end up washing the sheets because of leaking.  I would LOVE to find something just so I can take a break from having to wash constantly and help with the smell as well.  Not to sound mean but her room REEKS.  What options do I have if the pull ups just dont work and the ones for older kids are still WAY too big for her??  Its SOO hard to find something to fit her with her only being right around 40 lbs that doesnt leak.

Jennifer

Quoting Bethy16:

My ped recommended seeing a urologist. They can ck to see if there is something physically going on and give great advice on what to do. We found out my son wasn't voiding all the way. We worked on him during the day and it finally clicked in. It took a little while but at 8 he finally stopped wetting the bed. I know you said she refuses to go to the bathroom before bed you need to be tough but firm she has to go before she goes to sleep. She is at an age where she is going to want to sleep over friends houses and they will make fun of her if she has a pull up. A lot of praise and rewards. My son had his first sleep over a fwq weeks ago and he is so proud of himself!


Quoting jento1:

My daughter is 8 and still wets the bed no matter what I try or dont try.  The issue I have here is that the pull ups (the smallest size goodnites are still too big for her) leak ALL the time and I am desparate to find something to help minimize the laundry.  She is average height but SUPER skinny and right around 38-40 lbs.  She could care less that she wets the bed or wears pull ups and wont lift a finger to help herself stop.  She constantly sneaks drinks past a certain time at night and she flat out refuses to "try" to go potty before bed.  Does anyone know of anything that I can use to help with all the extra laundry???  I have tried trainers in the past but I end up with the same results....wet beds!  Anyone else have an older child that just doesnt care?  How can I help her stop if she doesnt care that she does it in the first place??  HELP!!!  Thanks everyone!

Jennifer



Bethy16
by Beth on Dec. 19, 2012 at 12:57 PM
I went by the advice of a pediatric urologist. I did everything they told me and it worked. To be honest I slacked on waking him up because I would fall asleep early. Most of the time when they sleep they go into a deep sleep and sleep through the bodies signals to wake up. That's what the Dr told me and my son is totally dry now.


Quoting MELRN:

I would just tell her  I have to put a diaper on you until you stop peeing when you sleep...simple as that..

I just wanted to comment on one thing I saw on here you should NOT ever wake a child to go to the bathroom this will cause them to have a bed wetting problem LONGER   because what you do is train the BRAIN to go to the bathroom during sleep time....  where potty training occurs is near the frontal left  brain which is an area that  doesnt develope  completely until about age 21  the  potty part is well formed by age 7 and kids who pee the bed after that age are vitems of their parents poor parenting idea like waking them to go to the bathroom just before they themselves go to bed ...bad idea  causes poor brain programming


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Bethy16
by Beth on Dec. 19, 2012 at 1:42 PM
Pampers make size 7 diapers. Put those on her. My friends not yet 3 yr old is HUGE! He weighs 10lbs more then my 4 yr old and that's what she uses on him. Or just regular pull ups. Good luck!


Quoting jento1:

Thanks...we have been to her dr several times as well as a urologist and have been assured that she is perfectly healthy.  She knows what she has to do to help herself stop but she just wont do it.  I havent allowed her to go on any sleepovers as of yet but she still wants to go.  The issue I have is the laundry OMG!  I will ONLY buy pull ups when I just need a break and even with them, I still end up washing the sheets because of leaking.  I would LOVE to find something just so I can take a break from having to wash constantly and help with the smell as well.  Not to sound mean but her room REEKS.  What options do I have if the pull ups just dont work and the ones for older kids are still WAY too big for her??  Its SOO hard to find something to fit her with her only being right around 40 lbs that doesnt leak.

Jennifer


Quoting Bethy16:

My ped recommended seeing a urologist. They can ck to see if there is something physically going on and give great advice on what to do. We found out my son wasn't voiding all the way. We worked on him during the day and it finally clicked in. It took a little while but at 8 he finally stopped wetting the bed. I know you said she refuses to go to the bathroom before bed you need to be tough but firm she has to go before she goes to sleep. She is at an age where she is going to want to sleep over friends houses and they will make fun of her if she has a pull up. A lot of praise and rewards. My son had his first sleep over a fwq weeks ago and he is so proud of himself!





Quoting jento1:

My daughter is 8 and still wets the bed no matter what I try or dont try.  The issue I have here is that the pull ups (the smallest size goodnites are still too big for her) leak ALL the time and I am desparate to find something to help minimize the laundry.  She is average height but SUPER skinny and right around 38-40 lbs.  She could care less that she wets the bed or wears pull ups and wont lift a finger to help herself stop.  She constantly sneaks drinks past a certain time at night and she flat out refuses to "try" to go potty before bed.  Does anyone know of anything that I can use to help with all the extra laundry???  I have tried trainers in the past but I end up with the same results....wet beds!  Anyone else have an older child that just doesnt care?  How can I help her stop if she doesnt care that she does it in the first place??  HELP!!!  Thanks everyone!

Jennifer





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